Monkey Dust: Crap Parents - Scottish Guests

[1CasuConsulto]

a quote from the video we all just watched

[Emmz33fromCP]

lol at the bit where the baby says: I`m gonna rip yer fuckin heid oaff!

[Spjungen]

what does he say? world's biggest ponts?

[kittykollar]

@Spjungen Worlds biggest Ponce...... "An individual who attempts to fake having intelligence, class, or culture"

[vacantplanet]

im gonna rip yer fookin heed off

[Sivvussa]

"Or, as I'll be shortening it to when I get older: 'Steve'!" XD

[jakixs]

I wish I could talk like that

[ImBoyCryWolf]

"see you. I'm gonna fuckin have you, pal"

I just cracked up. Heartily.

[Elberiver11]

Is that really a BBC program? Wow, i am surprised they air such bad words hahaha

But i like these Scottish accents :)

[TheXand19]

@Elberiver11 They're Glaswegian accents :(

[alski695]

@TheXand19 Scottish

[TheXand19]

@alski695 Glaswegians *are* Scots, albeit the worst kind. Wretched weegies.

[alski695]

@TheXand19 They're Irish

[TheXand19]

@alski695 Eh, no. Gtfo. Glaswegians come from a lil place called "Glasgow". Though yes, they are too sullied by the Irish to be counted as proper Scots.

[alski695]

@TheXand19 Irish / Nordish...fact

[TheXand19]

@alski695 Lol, there's been next to no Viking influence in Scotland, not even in shitty Glasgow. The weegies have a fair amount of Irish in them, hence why they have that fucking retarded Protestant/Catholic thing going on and an interest in that even greater shithole Northern Ireland.

[cmomofilm]

@TheXand19 "there's been next to no Viking influence in Scotland" lol, read a history book.

[TheXand19]

@cmomofilm I did and it tells me that mainland Scotland was never settled by Vikings. Scotland is a mix of Britons, Gaels and Picts so it's eminently Viking and Viking influence was barely felt here.

[lyris1]

>> A joke is not graded on the way the joke looks,

Tell that to Tex Avery and Bob Clampett... I'm sick of the way animation has gone down the shitter. The fact that something's animated shouldn't be an excuse for it to look crap.

[Cainus44]

@lyris1 Writing > Animation. If I want to look at pretty pictures, I'll go to the fecking Louvre. If I want to hear a witty animated joke, I'll watch Monkey Dust. Point is you're still being a pretentious cunt, dismissing good humour because you don't like the art style, and whipping out your shrivelled little dick for everyone to see and ruin it for them. Fuck off and go back to wanking at whatever the fuck you wank at, wanker.

[lyris1]

@Cainus44 I would, but your mom didn't like it.

[Cainus44]

@lyris1 I'd imagine she wouldn't care since she's laying six feet under in a Roscommon cemetery, but if you art cunts do have some crazy fetishes I suppose. It's only a natural a shrivelled prick goes into a shrivelled hole, eh?

[lyris1]

@Cainus44 Ouch, I hope that isn't actually true. In any case, your wit and unique insults are outstanding. Maybe you should write for Monkey Dust?

[Cainus44]

They're from Edinburgh. That explains it.

[flyingpancakes82]

0:01 <- Click here to avoid adverts :)

[whaddefuxx]

"see you! I'm gonnae fuckin' have you, pal!"

[wookywooky91]

luuuuv eeettt!

[Spjungen]

XD I fuckin' love the scots man.

[lyris1]

@xxpoisenandkissesxx It's telling that you thought my criticism was that the animation is unrealistic. The BEST (in my opinion) animation is unrealistic - if you want realism, pick up a video camera.

My problem isn't the lack of realism - this is just completely amateurish. I could draw something like this and I don't consider myself to have any drawing talent.

[seasider1962]

lyris1 get off your fat lazy arse, and produce a work of genius, rather than carping at the greatest programme thats ever graced our screens, The man was dying of cancer, and he had so many ideas to get out before his death, the comedy is the genius, he didnt have any time left to nitpick like some lazy useless tosser like yourself

[lyris1]

@seasider1962 Bollocks. "Well, can you do any better?" is the most useless defense in the book. When I produce work that is of this poor quality, you know what I do? Chalk it up to experience, don't release it - especially not through a professional outlet.

[Cainus44]

@lyris1 It's just the animation style, you dumb shit. If it bothers you that much, don't watch it. The point is the fucking joke. If someone tells you a joke, do you criticize him for his humour, or for what he's dressed in when he tells it?

[lyris1]

@Cainus44 Insulting my intelligence because I made a valid point. Nice. In any case, your analogy is bogus. Television, most of all animated television, is a VISUAL medium. If you can tolerate the fact this looks like shit, great! But don't tell me I'm stupid just because I can recognise that it's crudely made.

Following your example, a poorly lit, shaky-cam student film is the equal of a well photographed, expertly graded one?

[Cainus44]

@lyris1 Your example is poor, justifying my insulting of your intelligence. A student film is actually graded on numerous things, including film quality. A joke is not graded on the way the joke looks, and even if it was, the quality of the writing more than makes up for it.

The fact that it is crudely made is irrelevant. You point it out shows that you are waving your dick around, wanting everyone to know you're a pretentious art cunt.

[lyris1]

@Cainus44 Ah, if only that were actually true.

So, your point is that the visuals don't matter, and that the important part is the humour? In that case, this would surely be better off being a radio show.

[Cainus44]

@lyris1 Unfortunately not all humour transfers well without visual aid. The quality of the visual aid is generally irrelevant though as long as the writing is good. The writing is good, and writing will always be more important than art.

[Cainus44]

@lyris1 If you wanna show your shriveled art dick somewhere, shove it elsewhere.

P.S. You've got a video with poorly-rendered Japanese chibi shit on your profile. Hypocrite.

[lyris1]

@Cainus44 PS: Last time I checked, "Amateurish" wasn't a style.

[Excalibur32]

haha "im going to rrrip ya fookin 'ed off!"

[hotelmario510]

'Oh, that's better, he's crawling towards him!'

'I'm gonna rip yer fuckin; heid off!'

[JD1010101110]

earn as babies glaswegians are psychos!

[lyris1]

The comedy might not be bad, but the animation is utter garbage. Why are there so many untalented people somehow getting their chicken-scratch drawings on TV?

[xxpoisenandkissesxx]

@lyris1 the animation doesnt have to be crazy realistic and detailed, on monkey dust theres all types of animation styles, thats what makes it so great :)

[SylkkLillith]

Hahhahah xD

[thehegarty87]

steve

[tonyppe]

It's Ricky Gervais!

[Softrockman]

Rather confusing ..... presents from Edinburgh and yet Aly and Stuart are obviously wee bairns from Galsga tenement blocks, or rather apartments as they are referred to nowadays.

[fionndan]

@Softrockman I noticed that too. Although of course noone should take this too seriously - its an animated comedy ! - the accent confusion might speak of an sadly common ignorance and indifference to Scotland in ' Britian's ' media. Typical.

[cooljules19]

@fionndan i disagree, i believe the difference in accent is deliberate. its a cultural statement. The parents are "civilised" and overly-friendly. But the babies have a glaswegian accent to symbolise how aggressive they are. I find it a very funny statment, as its based on truth

[gordonw01]

@cooljules19 That's not a Glasgow accent.It's definitely a east of Scotland accent.

[AjayiMark]

@cooljules19 And how do you back up this claim of Glaswegians being "aggressive". I'd quite like to know as you sound like a bit of an intellectual..

[cat110max]

wtf why are there ads on this channel

[GLORD99092]

Terrible Scottish accents, ive been to Scotland and sounds alot better than that,

quality ending, lol!

[TheOnComingStorm121]

Is it just me, or does that baby remind me of Charlie Brooker?

[Jcahalane]

Is that the actor from Limmy's show?

[fionndan]

@Jcahalane It sounds nothing like him.. Was that the only person with a Glasgow / Strathclyde accent that you know of?

[Jcahalane]

@fionndan I live in Wales, of course it is.

[fionndan]

@Jcahalane haha. ahh awright. Im really gald to hear that Limmy's message reaches out past the Tweed and Solway and down to our cousins in Wales. He is a prophet. Is his show big in Wales?

[Jcahalane]

@fionndan Not really, probably because you can only watch it on BBC Scotland but I've been tryin to spread the word. More people need to turn off their quiz-coms and see his show.

[fionndan]

@Jcahalane Only on BBC Scotland ? Hmm.. I hadn't really thought about that when I was watching it here (in Scotland). Its annoying that...when shows that are made here are only broadcast here. But then shows made in England are broadcast to Wales, NI and Scotland. Less money is spent on shows produced in Scotland than money collected here through licence fees. Thats the BBC for you.

[Jcahalane]

@fionndan Depending on how well it was received, they might still show it around the country. I hope they do, it's not as if an English person's gonna turn on Limmy's Show and have a nervous breakdown at the sight of a Scotsman.

[fionndan]

@Jcahalane Its all part of the prevailing British ideology that what is English is normal, default, mainstream - and what is Welsh, Scottish or Irish is not, and therefore can only in exceptional circumstances be granted a seat at the table of normality. Thats just one reason why I will be voting for independence from Westminster on SNP on May 6. Sorry to bore you with a bit of politics. Its everywhere at the moment. :)

[Softrockman]

@fionndan, none so blind are those that cannot see .... now is that a quote about SNP supporters following Alec (Pied Piper) Salmond and his deviant clan, following his logic 95% of north sea oil and gas belongs to the Shetland Isle who in turn want their own independence from Scotland, talk about being led up a blind alley.

[heartandsoul1988]

@fionndan lol after recent events in regards to voting have you now realised it does

not matter who you vote for

[MrSoprano0125]

yee fackin deead!

[000JMTIZZLE000]

Oh yea, that would be fucking MAGIC.... wheres private Othello? hes in the toilet with a broom handle RAMMED up his ass.... x'D

[mikeycrimbo]

that is so damn funny rofl

[gazereths1982]

ya fuceen deed!

[93102926614]

i just love monkey dust!

[redman8903]

or as i'll be shortening it too later... Steve

[patrickbenjy1]

ahh scots

[Evalesco1]

since when did the BBC start gaining revenue from advertising? This is rediculous

[mert1875]

The BBC, more specifically its commercial subsidiary BBC Worldwide, is allowed to gain advertising revenue from foreign broadcasts. Has been for ages.

[garylssk]

you're an idiot...i bet you don't complain when they take the piss out the Irish or Americans or even some English...

[MustNotRead]

bonnie: eh? Monkey Dust is one huge mockery of British culture. you shouldn't be so sensitive.

[Spjungen]

Yeh pretty much everything on it is a parody of some aspect of the UK.

[ilias900]

Best I've seen since Southpark.

[heliumtrophy]

See yew, I'm gunna rip yer fuckin' heed, yer fuckin' deed.

[Dessan01]

Or... as I'll be shortning it to when I'm older... Steve LOL

RIP Harry Thompson (the voice of the baby and also the co-creator of Monkey Dust)

[burnzgotshot]

its a shame they stopped making monkey dust after Thompson died.

[Dessan01]

Thompson was the only one pushing for it really -The BBC thought MD would be different and controversial at first, it would give BBC3 the kick-start it needed, but eventually they just got too many complaints and didnt think it was worth it anymore. After Harry Thompson died the repeats got fewer and far between until eventually they just pretended it had never happened.

Look at the shite they show on BBC3 4 years later

[burnzgotshot]

The only thing the bbc seem to have going for them nowadays is mock the week.

[Dessan01]

lol even that isn't my cuppa tea to be honest!

[angryafghan]

Top Gear?

[AlxEllis]

LOL

[sprinterboy315]

Haha!! Gotta love it.

"It's the fucking jock"!!

[ShitMovies2000]

Oh come on, take a joke.

[madeinlarne]

"im gonna fuckin 'ave you pall" lmfao

[AnimeMusic99]

Oi BBC will you please just bring out Monkey Dust Series 2 & 3 on dvd already please!!

[rubberduckzilla]

lol peadohunter was awsome

[zombiekid16]

This is brilliant, because you know its true, DEEP DOWN :p

[Sionny]

Love this video :L

"oh piss off."

[dogmatix15]

it was the fucking jock and his fucking skirt!!!!!!!!

[killtie15]

-"that's better, Luke, he's crawling towards him"

-"aim gonna rrip yur fakin heed of".... rofl

[adisize]

It's "look" not "luke"

[cupofcustard]

You haven't read Trainspotting have you?

[adisize]

no, I haven't actually although i am a big reader. I understand train spotting is written i dialect... but the capitals made me assume they thought it was a name. If it is a reference to the film i have missed then, alas i am wrong.

[roastie4]

lmfao hahahahaha

[laughstomuch]

can any one recognize the who does the babies voice it sounds familiar

[catzblu999]

Just like Russell Crowe. Fightin Round the World

[Domitov06]

erm.....how?

[bbctimecommanders]

art and cuilture that's something new for scottish people

[MonkeyWrench4269101]

see, even as babies scots are bad!

[holymonkey3]

the woman at the beginning who was crying is from one of the timmy and daddy episodes.

[youcutmelegoff]

years ago my grans funeral was in london and when down there my brother got pissed and asked some guys if they wanted to play pool. they freaked out cause they could understand him. they just saw a pissed Scot holding a pool cue and jabbering at them.

[FODASSEZOR]

"Oh great,i've been bought a present by the world's biggest ponce"

[hoglad]

Oh, God...  This is just too good!

[Coffeecrab]

Mate you think you're pure smart because you can threaten strangers on the internet,but guaranteed you couldn't say that to my face.

[killqboyz]

i loled for an hour

[JitneyTV]

This is priceless!!

[Coffeecrab]

Sorry what was that, Jock?

[RafaElGaffer]

Calm down there Taggart.

[80rockforever]

rofl

[toleodor]

I'm sorry but pink and leather kilts should be illeagal, nothin says I'm a gimp faster than a black leather kilt. Tomake things worse at every award show some guy in a leather kilt shows up.

[LippyProductions]

this isnt really funny at all..

[ASithTheyCalledEmo]

Monkey Dust was a brilliant satire of our society, not another pointless comedy show like "lab rats" I saw last night.... just what the fuck WAS that?

[hinkyponky]

Absolute genius - truly British humour - at least it's not Friends - cool stuff

[strawberryfields1982]

About as funny as the aids virus!0*s

[augmorning]

When did Britain lose the ability of sarcasm? This is bad, American Bad, as in, how do you say it? Oh, yes, this is "Shiite". Congrats, you suck as much as we do, sleep tight, "Wankers".

[alewisuk]

The sketch isn't aiming to be sarcastic - so fuck knows what you're on about. All that is shite is this post.

[brightlights456X]

steve

[angelicMisha]

Aww Monkey Dust was brilliant, they've gotta repeat it, awesomeness!

[Tcheuchter1]

It's in the "Genes", Pal. The Scots must be the only race that calls somebody "Pal" then want tae Rip yer Heed Aff

[creeshywabster]

awright mate

[EuropeanCannon]

Which is itself a racist remark. Well done, pal. Ye've won yersel a coconut.

[Rhynome]

Oh, I say chaps, why not just settle down and have a jolly good cup of tea?

[creeshywabster]

feck off

[DoctorDodge]

first comment that refers to the vid:

thank you BBC for putting up one more great sketch! that baby is brilliant: "i'm a fucking embarrasment!"

[UncleKennybobs]

True story.