Ellen Degeneres Here & Now 2

[Krissy123K]

i have severe severe ocd (obsessive-compulsive disorder) and was extremely offended by that section of this sketch.. i realize it's just a joke and i have admired ellen from the very begining of her career, but you have no idea what it's like to live with such *extreme* stress like that every moment. i still LOVE ellen for her homour.. just not that joke! (haha watch her every day yet) p.s. ADD sucks! lol

[LaiChuenFai]

Good show.

[Velocity98]

21 people didnt procrastinate like us, they just made this their chore to dislike, how lame

[TheBlackcats11]

Way back when I was a baby / toddler my mom recorded this on the VCR  ( remember this was 2001 / 2002 ) and now we found it in the garage and are watching it almost every weekend ! LOL

[The1JAYJAY]

Decided to avoid studying by cleaning my place and watching this while I did it.

[abeille1217]

pop in the tape? lol geez this isn't that old, & she's talking about a VHS!

[Joy4anplay]

is it peeeaaassss?

lmao

[MashkaZelandiashi]

And also a disturbing.... gah I want to memorize the whole show.

[MashkaZelandiashi]

20 people have bad mouse aim.

[falcon20106]

Ellen is so hilarious.

[Elphenor333]

One of the best moments of laught of my life!! Just love it

[FHKJF1]

who the fuck disliked????

[socialbutterfly218]

"A disturbing new study finds that studies are disturbing"

[InesCena]

ive watched this easily like, more than 50 times

[emmXD13]

a disturbing new study finds that studies..are disturbing  lol XD

[RuthieJey]

I hate that both of the top comments are the same thing, but one has poor grammer :(

[hnm3246]

@RuthieJey I hate that you can't spell "grammar"  : )

[hnm3246]

@RuthieJey  I hate that you can't spell "grammar" : )

[RuthieJey]

@hnm3246

ahh, damn! mind you this was spelt at like 4 in the morning.

[hnm3246]

@RuthieJey  spelt? Now you're just being silly!

[littlechrisbigkiss]

when i was a kid we just had crazy people

[GraceMartini]

"There were no survivors. And Next, find out which candy bar helps you lose weight!"

[Duma39]

You know I heard on the news that there are pygmies on Paxil now since they all got cable. :-P

[the1calledchaylarose]

Thumbs up if you have TBD:)

[CaptivatingMusic]

"Also, a disturbing new study finds that studies are disturbing."

OMFG! I LOVE THIS WOMAN, SHE IS SO FUNNY!

[frostyh81]

I've almost memorized every thing she's said cause I've watched this so many times. :)

[lunahare2200]

Damned Audience, they're so much louder when they laugh

[hgirlrocks]

Haha XD Ellen rocks! :) she is sooo funny XD

[singrgrad2008]

"Is it peas????"

[yoghurtLady]

too busy disorder LOL

[eeks97]

20 people are offended by procrastination.

[chantelephone1]

Lol I'm totally procrastinating by watching this right now hahaha

[YoungDaVinci91]

4:36 "Are you sad?"

[RenegadeQueen]

this comedy stand up got me through a very rough patch in my life. luv ya Ellen!

[50MJ1958]

did anyone notice she drifted off from the video to help with procrastination to commercials

[milwanevidencee]

@50MJ1958 that's the point haha

[anujchandkapoor]

Please come to Singapore .... Ellen You are just awesome...

[514lindy]

Thumbs up if you procrastinating by watching the video....

[heromaly]

@514lindy Ha ha, yeah I am. I'm abo

[Raziel354]

Ah Ellen, where would we be without your comedy? -random guy answers- "watching NBC news" O_O. -Jumps off bridge- Daaaaammmnnnn yoouuuuuu.... -hits water-.

[MoreThanJustSkinDeep]

the waitress she told to get her sandwich made 19 accounts to dislike this video

[doubleAAbattery7]

"A disturbing new study finds that studies are disturbing..."

[TheMonstertruckman]

the reason im watching this is procrastination..

[musicismycrack]

@TheMonstertruckman hahaha me too



[ernotw]

Love Ellen!

[TheChika303]

"Is it peas?!"

[shethewriter]

I'm procrastinating....

[kbar2009]

I love her sense of humor. It's not obnoxious or malicious like most you see from other comedians.

[marthabeezy]

"also a disturbing new study finds that studies are disturbing" lmfao<3

[DorisHenrique]

I love how she actually talks about things that relate to others lol

[acciodoublestuff0202]

is it peas??? haha i love her

[loreliz4]

chris rock said that same thing WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO JUST BEING CRAZY !! DID WE JUST THROW AWAY CRAZY !! lolz

[snappingrubberbands]

i thought it was really funny and i have A.D.D, see the prob...........hey did i leave the oven on?

[EeyoreGirl8]

...is it peas!?

[ttqueenbee]

I hve A.D.D and i found it funny so wats the problem

[HiImLyssa]

we were talkin about procrastination and the waitress overheard us and she said "I have a problem with procrastination too!" I said "really? get my sandwich."

[DaAlzki7852]

The reason why women have a hard time being comedians and not supported!? The A.D.D joke!!!

[constance11able]

For realll lol

[WaterzEdge]

19 idiots have no sense of humor.

[81musicmaster]

i love ellen but i didnt like her joke about A.D.D.

[jestman5]

@81musicmaster You have ADD, so what? get over it... it's just a joke

[RascalFlattsgirl2]

lol i am laughing so hard I am crying!!! god i love you Ellen!! lol

[TheHarmonygrace]

"Is it peas?" LOL

[SummerSunshine1988]

I agree with her about the "crawl" on the news!

[noffekha]

When I was a kid, we just had crazy people :DDDDDDDDDDDDD

[Jeffieboi]

Woo hoo @ Survivor reference!

[melissamary819]

Nevr wathed her b4 yesterdy. Now i hooked

[theaterstar89]

i quote this sooo much:-)

[rafonkey94]

"you had to hate sumthin bad enough... to git up and walk that five feet=w=" xD thats my favorite part cuz thats how lazy i am d:

[LadeezANDgentz]

and i said really? get my sandwich!

LOL

[sherylcoo]

how can 19 people hate this??!!!

[nazerdawud23]

really get my sandwhich

[MadMadigan77]

@crasy4dolly yeah seriously im 13 and i find it funny!!

[narutolll]

PURE GENIUS. One of my favorite commedians.

[nibaa44]

luv ellen shes a goddess!!! :D

[BritneyBitch6789]

" a disturbing new study shows thats studies are... disturbing"

[xsmokexthatxkushx]

really? get my sandwhich...

[yuetching]

OMg_she is hilarious~~x =P

[relelo10]

" No! I say to that! NO!"

[1ninato]

ahh man

I think her comedy is too old for me =/

[Crazy4Dolly]

@1ninato How can it be to old for you ?? are you 5 ?

[cbsdis]

"When I was a kid.

We just had CRAZY PEOPLE.

that's all!

JUST CRAZY PEOPLE!!"

[MyNileyLover]

No i say to that no! I said no too that's right!

What about madonna's left foot what happened?...are you sad do you get stressed?

[xtian615]

does anyone know what that shampoo commercial was?

[christinecharles]

@xtian615 it was herbal essences

[143koolpunk]

"Really?.....get my sammich"

[MrCapone105]

hah im watching this to ease my nerves before i get my teeth ripped out tomorrow!

thanks YOU Ellen

[AddAngel]

"Also a disturbing new study finds that studies are disturbing." :)) they really are...

[scarredbanner]

Flying nun.. Julie Andrews.

[gymnastgirlflips]

I said "Really? Get me a sandwhich." hehe.

[Retroillusion]

"IS IT PEAS??"

[cbsdis]

"I find that if you don't press PLAY right away.....

....

.

..

Something's on TV."

[BlackPhenix69]

Man do i ever LOVE Ellen, but seriously, the t.v. and remote bit is a lil over used by comedians....not too mention parents who bitch about the old days....

[steph1232009]

Im meant to be finding info for a science test tomorow, writing an essay due tomorow, studying for a maths test tomorow... Oooo ellen on youtube... :D

[RAINintoTEARS]

HER FACIAL EXPRESSION!!! LOLLLL love ellen, no other comedian does that as well or even at all! i got this on dvd

[sphmusak]

"I said, really?.... get my sandwich"......

[live2smile26]

hahah she cracks me up.

waiter: I have a problem with procrastination too!

ellen: oh really? get my sandwich!

lol.

[opthalmologiclinsee]

She has hosted both the Academy Awards and the Primetime Emmys.

[jdubMAD1]

Is this Justin Bieber?

[amaliefuckingwhitta]

@jdubMAD1 go die.

[pushherinthesnow]

@PrincessaSophie That is my favorite line! Cracks me up. She's awesome.

[thetwiparamore]

We had just crazy people!

And they getcha right away! Are you sad?

NO I SAY TO THAT!!!! NO!!

What about Madonna's left foot. WHAT HAPPENED??!!

Goes back to commercial.. Are you sad, do you have stress?

Is it peas?

There were no survivors, then NEW CANDY BARS THAT HELP YA LOSE WAIT!

[KillerQueen4691]

Fake it!

[corey246]

"she gotta go!"

[avatarfan08]

"a disturbing new study shows that studies are disturbing."

[PrincessaSophie]

"Really? Get meh sandwich!"

[lalalilmiss]

yess its peas!! haha

[TSuperbrainable]

ELLEN IS JUST THE BEST... :'D

i love her, she is a great person.

[Ilkamy]

Attention deficit disorder...

...when I was a kid we just had crazy people too... ;-)))

This is so amusing...

[HarryBentleyComedy]

gotta love the disturbing study bit :)

[69BrittanyJoy]

Really, get me a sandwhich XD ahahahaha

[ayashadini]

People eat bugs and marrying strangers for money. LOL. gotta luv that one!

[themusicguy12]

A disturbing new study shows that studies are disturbing

xD

[sugarychocobot]

I'm procrastinating now :D

[coolnerd92]

lolz ""is it pee's?""

[streetsmarts990]

lol "really? get mah sandwich" xD

[clearlyqueer]

haha!!! turn on the captions and at 5:30 look at what it says: "and it's a crawl down there to God..."

[fanniemaeflippers]

Hahahah! I am procrastinating just watching this! Ellen rocks :)

[ThinkinAboutHim4]

Wow!!! When you turn the Captions on... They're soo wrong. Lol

[ThinkinAboutHim4]

"There were no survivors...And next, Which candy bar helps you lose weight! :), Still to come is an asteriod headed towards Earth. But first, where to find the cheesiest pizza in town! :)... Also, a disturbing new study finds that studies are disturbing"

Gotta love Ellen! :)

[kmmc0]

6:10 hahah it's so true!

[rulOza]

she rocks!

[stubborn444]

I noticed that the part when she talks about watching the news, and then the news crawl and writing opinions on polls (5:30), is the same as Jerry Seinfeld's in one of his routines. wondering who came with it first.

does anyone know when this aired?

[katjandana]

were all crazy now

[ThunderButt31]

IS IT PEAS?

[blueyedemo6]

lol i love her! shes hilarious

[Browneyes221996]

When I was a kid, we had 6 minute long commercials telling us how delicious cigarettes and alcohol were

[IndoorSwimingPool]

I can't stop laughing! I love Ellen! Ahhah!

[uberlac]

"Is it peas?!"

[xxMan0nnxx]

'when I was a kid, we had just crazy people, that's all..' love it!!!

[MegaSpeedyGonzalez]

prozac as an advertisement ?!

[steviegb]

"you won't find a pigmy on Paxil".... Genius

[MsDanElena]

Is it peas!!!!! LMAO!!!!!

[coconutsprinkles]

TBD= TOO BUSY DISORDER

lmao:)

[dickielabia]

It could be the most deadly thing in the world and you may be having it for dinner, we'll tell you what it is tonight at 11.

Is it peas?

LMAO!

[guitarismypassion11]

Your so right that's so funny!!

[cabronaloca101]

i luv how she can be funny without cussing. soo refreshing.

[twink1ebug]

@cabronaloca101 ...and without being remotely offensive or caustic.

[Midwaythrough]

Omfgosh

[danicassoff13]

omg i fucking love her

[Divecchio317]

If you don't press "play" right away, somethin's on....

[Inahzi13]

"I have a problem with procrastination too,

Really ? Well get mah sandwich" LOL

[ZooTycoon223]

also, a disturbing new study finds that studies are disturbing.

[Koda924]

WTF?!?! Carlos Mencia stole from her too? OMG who DOESN'T he steal from?

[ylvira]

"Yes, I have all those thigs, I'm alive!" That is so true.=)

[nowhereman012]

This is one of the best stand up routines ever. Her transitions are amazing and the way she wraps around the procrastination idea is phenomenal. You can tell she actually put tons of work into this set.

[macantr]

IS IT PEAS?? lol

[Havixus]

What about madonna's left foot?!

[mmasny]

I don't know.

[CdnStargazer]

"That woman in the shampoo commercial... she's happy. She's too happy. I fell for it, I bought the shampoo. I... I gotta tell you, I was shampooing for a good half hour and I never got that happy. I... finally just had to fake it you know, cuz I had to get out of the shower."

ROFL

[mildred7]

oh my god the impression of the judge killed me hahaha cause theyre actually that corny in commercials..

[SECRETSLOVE700]

Is it me or Ellen looks different in this video ? But she still look great :>

[SuperPandas]

News reporter's emotions bit was the best.

[SuicidalMickeyMouse3]

Ugh procrastinaltio. I really should do my English homewrok. Eh, Ellen's more important!

[brenzkrieg]

hahaha amaaazing talk :D i so agree with it!

[pepperfs]

I am soo procrastinating I should be going Xmas shopping and then the gym but I'm stuck here watching Ellen lol.

[XxThereIsAGodxX]

yea i should be doing homework even though i'm on christmas break. :(

[SuicidalMickeyMouse3]

haha me too

[LeDiskoLove99]

"It could be the most deadly thing in the world and you may be having it for dinner! We'll tell you what it is tonight at 11."

Hahahaha I love how she says "Is it peas?"

She has the best facial expressions.

[Pam4Rob]

lol that was my fav part too.

[laurieheartsdcx]

"You're not gonna find a pygmy on Paxil, I'll tell you that right now."

[MONIQUEIJ]

i love her lol

[hihihibi]

"really, get my sandwich"

lmao i love ellen she's hilarious

[orlisbetteskid]

"Also a disturbing news study finds that studies are disturbing"

LMAO.

[ctbcs]

lmfao!

[analyzeee]

hahaa she is so cute

[unprofessionalemail]

I think Ellen gets the short end of the stick. She is hilarious and alot of people tend to hate on her, and perfer other comedians. I think she's fantastic.

Also, I like how she mentioned a flying nun. "Flying Nun", the greatest record lable ever.

[LivBird8]

........................ is it peas?!

[YankeeDoodlePoodle]

and i dont have to go right now LOL

[JRodFilms]

ellen is corny, but not as corny as caroline rhea, jesus!

[HausOfMigi]

Does anyone else hear that dumb bitch laughing the entire time thru all the vids?? the girl laugh is hilarious.