How To Get A Guy To Notice You While You're Having Sex With Him-- from The Onion News Network ONN

[bs4e]

"ohh good questions" LMAO

[PS3GRIMREAPER91]

I always thought too much eye contact was bad or awkward.bow there saying they don't do any,that's kind of dumb "is he thinking of me flduring sex?" Really who do you think he thinks of,his mother?? Wtf are you thinking,guys always think if there too small even when there in bed with a woman/man what ever your into,atleast that what i always think "i think i might need an extension for this one" but hey,I'm self-conscious about my small sick,at least that's how i see it.

[ambermosley84]

wtf lol

[Ruffles2811]

Are they forreal??? Lmbo

[dfpuma92]

LOOOL stupid americans

[TrollFromOuterSpace]

Is this seriously the only way for you to get views? To steal other channel's videos? Wow.

[winnabego]

"hey where did that ball come from?!"

[LocoGroove]

Hahaha amazing! This is why I love the Onion

[bimms84]

dude... i lost interest as soon as those girls starting yapping

[Nuluix]

i lol'd hard

[iiTrySoHard]

Who this new girl sitting on my dick?

[soha33]

Take your child to help you look for work day, lol..

[Reguba24]

@soha33 I think that was the funniest part haha!

[LiViNgFeAr12]

obviously this is fake

i mean firstly, u cant say fuck on national tv, ans secondly it just says stuff that wouldnt be on tv

[joey8on]

@LiViNgFeAr12 no shit



[LiViNgFeAr12]

@joey8on now i knw wut it is now, i nvr watch the onion be4 lol

[CygnusTheif]

@LiViNgFeAr12

its the onion, its supposed to make fun of real news reports

[LiViNgFeAr12]

@CygnusTheif ohh lol well i nvr watched the onion

and the only comments i saw were ppl askin if it was fake lol

[LiViNgFeAr12]

oh yeah

while i'm getting nailed in the ass, ill walk to the kitchen and whip up a batch of cookies.

[thadea]

solid advice

[Choppaaah]

1:11 "Who's this new girl sitting on my DICK???" hhaHAhAHah

[SmittySmitha]

Not cool to steal videos...

[ecaep42]

this is my new news network :)

[Kidcar16]

Is this a joke? LMFAO

[katiebird317]

@Kidcar16 It's The Onion for Christsakes..Google it.

[MrSammccarthy]

o my god, they shhow this on national T.V.? i gusse this a serious problem in mondern day society

[AlexEXE]

@MrSammccarthy It's fake, smart one.

[LocoGroove]

@MrSammccarthy You're a serious problem in modern day society. Idiots should be shot.

[kennethx978]

2:00 - Sex and you never have to leave the kitchen! Is this not the greatest compromise for a woman or what?

[jlr2347]

marry me?

[kibaz143]

wtf?

 xD

[sabreforever556]

i find this video difficult to masterbate to....

[jmoneyboy08]

@sabreforever556 not me i jus blew my load on the screen

[d3t0x08]

#lol

[Hinjin95]

Just some of the news reels on the bottom:

Spiders named the # 1 thing you do not want to explode out of welts on your body

1 in 3 Americans believe Obama has personally scattered garbage on their lawns

Majority of doctors admit they spend every waking moment thinking about all the genitals they have seen

[GetinTheVanUPSB]

1:51 = win

[rhcp4565]

I'll just stick to the fucking

[mlcoo17]

"and when he comes you can have a fresh cookie ready for him" LOL I'll have to run this idea by my girlfriend.

[Richierich1285]

@xXTheVirus  lol yeah i though so

[VicRoseMusic]

ahhahahahaha!

[RastaSaur]

Who's this new girl sitting on my dick? XD

[G1b23]

heheheeheheheheh :)

[blue30r]

Was this shit really on tv?

[skater4circa940]

how would you not notice if you were having sex with someone?

[Samiam108642]

Ask him to open a jar and compliment him on how strong he is xD

[PlanetRoxas]

onion! XD

[elvis316]

If you don't understand this is a joke, please return to your Justin Bieber/Gaga videos. Believe me, it will be extremely funny to you in 20 years.  So save this now, and put it on your calendar.

[ShadowN1nja11]

Im confused..... it almost sounds like the people running the show are gay, and Im sure you don't trow the f bomb out there on t.v, I somewhat think this video is a prank or something.....

[CarlosJulio20]

@ShadowN1nja11 you can say fuck on cable :)

[XxRoFuSxX151]

cookies and sex . . . a real bad bitch

[EnamoredWolf11]

Lawl..?

[bigryan991]

whos this new girl sittin on my dick!

[waterdragon1908]

wait, that was a joke right?

[Rakehell007]

lol this is weird xD

[Godvida]

okay when i fuck a girl i dont notice her...wtf am i doing? fucking the air?

[acdc601234]

Totally worthy of s*turday n*ght l*ve

[MrABCore]

What...The...Fuck...

[warning208]

is this a joke?

[PalardyDirt]

designated next friday as bring your child to help you look for work day.. haha

[0515524847]

that is so stupid & funny LOL Are the people really leading that rush hour type life when the only place where they can get a decent conversation is while having sex LOL !!! People get a grip. Prioritize your life Relationships demand time. About time you start giving that shit to them. peace out.

[SkittlesNTwix]

"How do I know a guy is into me when he ejaculates?".....That'd be....when he cums inside you.....DUH

[unitedcheerstar]

lmao...... this shit is hilarious.. <3 i could not say all that shit on tv lol...

[exonerator]

LOL

[Richierich1285]

wtf their fucking i think hes into her

[69Darkwings69]

"Whos this new girl sitting on my dick?" I lol'd

[maile321]

here's a clue........if you have to come up with ways to get a dude to pay attention to you while your doing him then you shouldn't be doing him. No bracelet or hot meal is gonna make you more than a piece of ass to someone who is concentrating on coming and nothing else #getitogether

[nugibassemand4ever]

.....this is just......fucked up



[JML689]

this is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo stupid, if a guy is fucking you ofcourse he notices u, duh

[54356789]

@JML689 ...I hope you're faking that ignorance. I really do.

[iLuv2sing365]

ok now i have to watch this show

[Ks50calkilla]

onion news FTW!!!

[RcRABS]

that was pretty damn funny!

[grangarian]

this is a joke right?

[vad3r101]

All The Ladies Gotta Do Is Sukk Us Up N Well B More Than Happy. Thats The Key 2 A Healthy Sex Life!

[trapizoid]

This is a big bullshit..

[princeofpersia042390]

lol um, the fact that they are fuckin a chick is the part where we are noticing you. unless we are in a relationship with you and fucking, dont fuckin talk to me while i'm laying the pipe. just lay back and enjoy. don't cockblock yourself ladies.

[djgizmoe]

Great satire of crappy women's mag advice pablum...

[aznbcu2006]

Wow. I need to post this on mlib

[gdosic]

I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes.

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...??

[getoutofthematrix]

You just started some motherfuckin star wars.

[elvis316]

@getoutofthematrix men love a confident woman they can blow their load into.

[hawkacutioner]

@elvis316 true that. I purposely look for a hot receptacle to fill 'full-filled' each day.