Added: 3 years ago
From: MyOwnStickFigure
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  • Your cute, please live! 

  • i know what you mean by the "full" feeling. i associate that full feeling with memories of being heavier and weight gain...i've never been fat or anything but i have weighed more than id like. i guess that we bulimics don't want any negative feelings especially associated with food and our image.

  • you are so strong

    you can do this

  • whenever i want to puke i lay on my bed, put a pillow over my face, listen to the radio and cry and scream. :P it really works! you're really an inspiration, keep fighting!

  • looking back on this video i can see so much of your progress you have made <3 im very proud of you my dear <3 your incredable

  • i just wish i was skinny thats y i do it...the only ting that prevents me from doin it most times is my teeth!

  • I can totally relate to all this... I find it really helping to go on camera aswell in these cases! I actually felt like this earlyer today.. and I managed to keep the food in... And yeah... i think its a better idea to wait until your in control before you go to the bathroom!

  • A good friend of mine is fighting bulimia and I'm trying to figure out what I can do to help her. These videos really help me understand what she is dealing with, and I hope that she will overcome this disease. I hope you will too. I wish you all the best.

  • I have to say, I admire you so much. I wish I'd seen this video an hour ago, before I made the mistake to giving in to the feeling of fullness by purging and taking my lax. However comforting and strangely relaxing it was to do, I still wish that I somehow had the strength you displayed in this video.

  • i wish i could have been there with you...keep fighting! you're so strong and i'm so proud of you!

  • i just want to hold you :(

    i know you can beat this..

    day by day.. i will be here to support you

  • this really helps a lot. you have incredible willpower!

    Next time I feel the need to purge, I can remember your vid, cuz It's shown me It really isn't worth it.

    thanks for giving me some hope

  • Perhaps you can try to form new memories with being full?

  • when i can get over the old ones, yes, you bring up a brilliant idea to master

  • It is good to know someone else has a tormented mind (well not nice for you at all, but I just mean others will get comfort from identifying with it) So thank you for being so brave to film these things. Your prayers are so encouraging as well. I don't know if you prayed for me after my previous video comment, but if you did - it worked. I am much stronger now and I will keep you in my prayers too.

  • I do not suffer from an eating disorder but am intrigued in a strange way by it. Although I'm hearing the same things from different people in their videos, I don't understand it. I want to know why there is so much self-destruction. Why it's so hard to overcome and eat. I wish you well on you road to recovery and sincerley hope that you win your fight. Let the beauty of nature inspire you and remember that you are part of it as well. 'Tis the season of life and renewal. Best of luck to you.

  • I think it's wonderful you want to learn about this, especially since you don't suffer it. It's really great of you to take interest into learning. Education is everything. One may never understand the true nature of addiction but I can tell you that food or lack of is the drug of choice to someone with eds. I'd recommend you study more about the brain in order to understand addictions. It will give you major insight to how one can self-destruct and not think twice of it or somehow "enjoy it"

  • The feeling of fullness was completely UNBEARABLE for me before...I can completely relate to you! It was like an 'eject' button being pushed every time I ate something, whether it was broccoli or ice cream or whatever... Just keep in mind, that you are SO strong in that you can resist that 'eject' button!!! The feeling does go away when you get more used to eating....Stay strong!! ((hugs))

  • Hey..

    The feeling off fullness is one that i did have problems with initally in my recovery. Now...i am stuffed every night, like you, i am eating healthy food (for me, its veg) so its not going to do any harm being inside me :) Slowly...very slowly the urge to get rid of the food will go. Of course i still get days when i don't feel great with my weight, but i never act on it.

    You'll come through good, i KNOW you will..

    Sarah&hearts;

  • Hi sweetie, hang in there. You're in my thoughts and my prayers.

    Is there some place you can go after you eat that will make it next to impossible for you to throw up?

  • good video!!!

  • GOD! i know exactly how u felt!am struggling with this shit..each day i really suffer!..thnx for ur video it's helping me not to do that anymore

    xo xo

  • You have realy loveley eyes.

    and, your cute when you yawn =]

    x

  • Hey hun, if you don't mind..would you post some pics of you growing up?

  • No, I won't do this. This would be the most triggering thing I could ever do. I don't look at or touch them. Just being honest.

  • I agree. I have the same thing.

  • okay, then please don't.

  • ♥

  • hey cutie... i'm glad you were able to overcome it this time! each time you do, makes you a bit stronger. keep it up!

    xoxox

  • i think its so good to talk through it, because really, others help us with a lot. i have learned that others are a big support in my life, instead of shying away from people. so awesome on that, and on everything! you're doing so good! dont give up!! you're right- recovery is a long process and you're making a difference by fighting it today! i admire you!

  • you're so awesome. it takes a really strong person to talk himself through an urge rather than act on it...that's maturity right there. inspiring as always <3

  • Thank you again for your candor and bravery. It was inspiring to watch you move from complete panic to empowerment as you talked your shit out, so to speak. Luv you!

  • I think it is a great idea for you to just lay and process for a while when bulimia's urges are that powerful. I am so incredibly proud of you! You are amazingly strong. *hugs*

  • cuddles x

  • good job sweetie. I hope you made it all the way to digestion. But if not, oh well, you always have the next meal you can work on. every little step is a positive one towards recovery. Sending love to you.

  • Thank you love, so much. For the record - I would never post a video like this if I purged after, I just couldn't bring myself to do that and mislead people. I always post info in the INFO box for the movies in case someone can't view the video for whatever reasons, HUGS

  • Another success - I'm so happy for you! You are showing everyone that they CAN fight ed urges, and that empowers them as well as you. If you were full, you were full of GOODNESS, and that makes a huge difference too. You are stronger than you know.

    (Ps: There wasn't any broccoli in your teeth :)

  • It was actually seaweed and there is a big chunk that's very visible on one part of the video ... some on my lip before I lick it too lol Cindy, my Lemon, I hope you got my emails and phone message.

  • Sweety I will be back,.,. I deleted my account someone was really being rude.. But I will be back

  • stay strong and keep fighting!

    <3

  • Keep on being strong Johnny! You can do it, you are already on your way! Im rooting for you! Love

  • Also another positive thought behind feeling full is to be thankful for the ability to feel full.

  • Very interesting, I am not at a point in my recovery where I can accept that and it's safer for me not to focus on full but rather focus on food more as medicine to help heal me along my recovery and sustain life. Your prespective will really benefit me once I am at that point, Thank you!

  • Great to have made a video as soon as you heard bulimia's annoying voice. Keep up the fight, you are so much stronger than all of those compulsions, OCD, bulimia, anorexia... who needs 'em??

    Enjoy the sunshine, sunshine!

  • You can do it! That's good just focusing on abstinence from it, one meal at a time.

    I gave in to that feeling yesterday, just enough to get rid of the full feeling. Still felt sickish and somewhat guilty afterward, tho I only do it maybe 2 or 3 times a year so that was my mental argument for doing it. An hour ago I felt almost as full but resisted this time.

    Progress, not perfection.

    *hugs*

  • Progress not perfection = brilliant, YES! Hugs. Slips don't have to turn into cycles and they do NOT take away from your progress. You have worked your ass off in recovery and it's natural to have a downslide every so often, it's part of recovery. Life isn't a bowl of cherries, sometimes we find worms along the way.

  • hang in there. you can make it through this. fight the urges and you will win over the bulimia. talking does help make it through the urges. typing the urges away helps sometimes as well.

  • You are just even cuter with broccoli in your teeth! This video was incredible..Your strength is soooooo inspirational-i purged last night and i wish i had seen this before as it has really empowered me today! Purging is not an option anymore, you know? I wish i was there-id have grabbed your hang and dragged you out into the beautiful sun..... xoxox

  • Last night is over and like I just told someone above - it doesn't take away from any progress. Shit, I struggled daily with multiple purging and that doesn't take away from all the hard work I'm doing with anorexia, bulimia and orthorexia (and bdd, ocd, shopping addiction). I'm glad this vid empowered you, come back to it at anytime! Broccoli kisses to you!!! smirk

  • fight johnny fight!!

  • You can do this Johnny!!!! You are a strong human being, and I applaud you for being so open about having hard times..

    Keep up the positive thinking, you will have a beautiful day! Yay!!!!

    Love Selma

  • wow!you been doing abs?

  • lol funny you noticed, yes actually... i have been working out per request of my physical therapist and also to help support my muscles, body and overall health as i restore weight and recover. when i look healthier in the body i will show you what hard work can do : ) what i've earned

  • Hang in there Johnny, fight the urge to purge. I've been in the same situation you have, and I know it's not easy to do. Tough it out darlin', you're well on your way to recovery =)

  • i m so sorry that u r going through all ofthis.. BUT KEEP POSTING.. you are helping yourself and others by making these vids...

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