"Eternity" is by far the biggest of the dumb ideas in the bible. Too lazy to quantify something? Slap a lil infinity on it to fix it up.
In the face of eternity every good or bad action becomes inconsequential. Hmmm, maybe the bible is saying our lives are pointless. That would explain the sky-daddy's gleeful exuberance towards slaughter and indifference to suffering.
@misterdeity Example: There's a planet Sprog 1 billion light years from Earth that, let's say, God doesn't know about. There is a resident on this planet, Zork who is about to be killed by a Splink. God is powerless to save Zork's life because he doesn't know he exists. QED.
@kenotube That's just more of not being all knowing. He could still be all-powerful in that circumstance -- he could have saved Zork's life had he known. He just didn't know. But that again is a failure of knowledge, not power. BTW, isn't it fun pretending we could know anything about any of this?
@misterdeity Well, that was my point. He could have saved Zork's life, had he known. But since he wasn't all knowing, he didn't have the power to save his life; hence, he is not all-powerful, if he is not all-knowing. And yes, it is fun pretending. Although, I think it would be a terrible burden to be all-knowing or all-powerful.
@kenotube Being all-powerful, he could travel back in time and save Zork once he finds out. But the larger point is that speaking of a Being who is "all-powerful" or "all-knowing" means absolutely nothing in the context of a personal being. These are merely concepts attached to the idea of God to make Him more palatable -- to assuage our fears, and lift our hopes. God needs to be all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-good to do that. But as a friend says, "pick any two."
I think the point kenotube tries to make is that all-powerfulness logically necessitates all-knowingness. After all to be able to do something, you need to know how to do it. The problem with this thought is that logic doesn't need to apply to all-powerful imaginary beings, as the literature overwhelmingly shows.
@misterdeity of course an all powerful being could deliver an edict to not allow killing. Zork would be saved. A circumstance that allows all powerful to exist, without all knowing existing. To me that seems to be a simpler rebuttal. Oh but then again there is the pesky free will thing.
You asked Jesus into your heart....but you are NOT saved...because when you are truly saved a Supernatural event takes place....the dead Spirit that was alienated from God becomes alive to God. They become born again as the old saying goes. They realise how LOST they were they are THANKFUL to God for saving them...they LOVE God will all their heart. Their Blind eyes are opened. So you said some prayer? God is not fooled. You mock God and do NOT have the faith that comes from God.
The god he's mocking, would that be the one who ordered the genocide, infanticide, incest, rape, murder, slaughter of firstborns, stoning non-virgins, homophobia, and racism?
That god? Cause that god is an asshole and deserves to be mocked always.
@pele1281 Well, you should mock while you can then.....because you won't be laughing in hell. God is not mocked what a man sows he reaps. Gods standard is way, way above YOUR standard. You comment on Gods righteousness. He doesn't owe you ANYTHING. YOU turn your back on God of your own choice. God has given you FREEDOM to do so. God is merciful and the Old Testament shows the standard it takes to be sinless.... The new -God Grace....the judgement we deserve was put on Jesus.
@JMMCL16 I can't help it if God transform me. I can't create a Supernatural event! But I did have a very similar experience when I left religion -- realized how lost I'd been, was thankful to be free of religion, loved my new perspective and the tools to access supernatural claims, and my eyes were open! Before that, I did everything you said with great sincerity (when I was deeply religious) and got no supernatural transforming event. Your God is sleeping on the job! Good thing Jesus covers me!
@misterdeity Jesus does not cover you. Sorry, you don't really know Jesus - you may have read the Bible - but you are right God did not transform you by his Spirit. If he had....you would have known!
@JMMCL16 So then, what is someone like me supposed to do? I used to be a true believer (very hardcore), I looked into it using my brain and the reasoning skills God gave me, and now I simply can't look myself in the mirror and say that I believe some guy (who may be pure legend) was God. If it's all about what you believe, and I simply don't (and can't or won't force myself to lie and say that I do), what am I supposed to do?
@BlueEnigma34 Just take a look at one of my music videos - Don Moen....or Michael W Smith....watch what happens when people worship the God they KNOW. Hindus, Muslims....they do not have that worship of the Soul....because they have head knowledge only. Also, preachers can go in to India or Africa and preach via a trnaslator about Jesus - the Power of God and the Gospel convicts people right where they are. How does that happen in any other religion or any other name but by the name of Jesus
@JMMCL16 I'm not seeing any Hindu or Muslim preachers going to Africa or India or anywhere else for that matter... I read the gospel, why am I not converted on the spot?
@JMMCL16 You are so naive to think that kind of thing only happens in Christianity. Mormons, Jehovah's Witnesses, Muslims, Jews, etc... all have that kind of thing happen. In fact, Islam and Mormonism are both growing faster than Christianity. Furthermore, only 1 in 7 people in the world is a Christian. You are simply uninformed and have a very provincial view of the world. This is exactly how Christianity survives -- keeping people ignorant of other ways.
He covers my sin - yes, because I have genuinely acknowledged my sins, I have asked Jesus to be my saviour and vowed to follow him. Yes, I still fail, but I know God see's my failings and loves me because I love him. Jesus said we need to be BORN AGAIN - its a spiritual birth, God makes a change deep in our spirit, when we sincerely seek him.
@JMMCL16 Well, how can I sincerely seek someone I don't believe exists? Again, it seems you want me to lie, which would just be another sin. Why aren't my doubt and insincerity just two more sins that Jesus' death will cover if you're right?
@misterdeity Jesus has covered ALL sins - for those who ask him to do so. You do not know he exists, because your eyes are blinded to the spiritual, the amazing thing is, your eyes can be opened by Gods Spirit - it does take a step of faith, but God will meet you in that step. Honestly. Doubt is understandable, but when we see OUR sin, the way WE have messed up this world, with our Sin - when we ask God to open our eyes to HIS purity, holiness and justice - then we say Amazing Grace!!!
@JMMCL16 I fully acknowledge that if your God exists, He created me sinful and because of that I am a sinner (I don't know how I could be anything but when He's stacked the deck like that). And I've asked Jesus to cover my sins if He exists. But I can't honestly say that I belief something if I don't. And if I'm continuing to sin by being faithless, why isn't that covered -- it's just another sin? Does God not want me to be honest? If I don't believe the Jesus story, what am I supposed to do?
@misterdeity He hasn't stacked the deck like that....we stack the deck like that...with every lie and every spiteful word or deed - yes we are human and fallen and deeply flawed and I admire your honesty in admiting that you do not believe in the Jesus story. That is where God does step in. When we are at that point when we can honestly say "Yes this is me, I AM a sinner, but I don't believe" if you are open God can and will show you as I CANNOT, that he is real. It is a supernatural thing.
@JMMCL16 Of course He's stacked the deck. I am born into sin in your word view. I didn't CHOOSE that, He did. This is another immoral part of your belief system. We are all paying the price for someone else's sin (Adam -- who, btw, never existed. The Earth isn't 6,000 years old, and death has been going on for billions of years). I have always been open to being wrong about God's existence, but so far God has shown me nothing. And the Jesus story is simply unbelievable.
@misterdeity Adam paid for his sin....you must pay for yours. You either belong to God or satan. You are either going to hell and then to the Lake of Fire of to Heaven. You ARE aware of right and wrong. You are without any excuses. Jesus offers you Life in heaven, and peace on this earth.....which path will you choose?
@JMMCL16 You're not hearing me. I asked Jesus into my heart. I'm covered. If He is real, I'm saved. I think it's a totally immoral story -- the idea of putting one man to death for all of our sins and for the sin we didn't even commit, but was simply attached because some man (who didn't even really exist -- Adam) partook of a metaphorical piece of fruit some 6,000 years ago. BTW, if you believe in the Adam and Eve story, how has all this death been going on for billions of years?
Respond to this video... Continued........and as it is a Supernatural spiritual God - he needs to reach into our flesh and blood bodies and this is why Gods SPIRIT is on the earth. If you ARE open, to REALLY know the truth and you ASK God to show you, BECAUSE you cannot of yourself believe you NEED that evidence of Faith, then God will MOVE through his SPIRIT. He will open your eyes. Are you ready to see?
@JMMCL16 I've been ready for 20 years. But do you realize that people of every other religion believe the same thing about their God -- the Mormons, the JWs, Muslims, Jews, 7th Day Adventists? You can't KNOW anything this way. What if God came down, proved that He was God with all kinds of miracles so that no one could doubt. Then, what if He told you that you needed to join His one true faith -- Islam? Would you dump your faith in Jesus?
@jacksawild You may have a heart attack, or get hit by a car.....you may not have the chance to do a last minute confession. Plus, God knows the heart and he will know how genuiine you are. Today is the day of Salvation. Tomorrow may be too late. What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world, but loses his soul.
@JMMCL16 My problem with that is that you are messaging me on a computer, which I presume belongs to you even though JC was quite clear that to follow him you should sell your possessions and give the money to the poor. It's difficult to listen to someone who ignores the parts they don't like. Mtw 19:21 Lk 12:33
@jacksawild Uhhhh?!!!! Possessions should always come secondary, but I think JC would approve of my USING the computer to pass on the gospel.. I go into the world and preach the gospel....from my laptop. Pretty Good Idea. I am sure God would be very pleased!
If you asked Jesus to be your Saviour as a joke - then God knows that! He knows our hearts......people only see the outside. We are all good at putting on acts, but God knows the truth and he sees what no one else see.
@JMMCL16 But I don't believe the Jesus story. If I said I did, I'd be lying and he'd know that too. This way, i've done what He said to do and should be covered if you're right. Yes, I'm doubtful and insincere. But those are just two more of my sins that Jesus' death is supposed to cover, right? Why does he cover your sins and not mine?
GOOD QUESTION! God made satan as LUCIFER the highest ANGEL in heaven. Magnificent he wanted to rise ABOVE God. He rebelled against God and a third of the angels went with lucifer who now fallen....became satan and the fallen angels demons. If people don't want fellowship with God......at all.....then you take all the God out (all that is the best and most beautiful)and you HAVE hell. Without God...at all it is just that.
@JMMCL16 1. If God knew Lucifer would do that, why create him? 2. After He rebelled, why not just annihilate him? 3. If you're all-good and all-powerful, you can surely make a nice Earth-like place for people who don't want fellowship with God (because they disapprove of the genocide, killing of homosexuals, non-virgins, ect... you know, people of good taste and high morals). Or, just annihilate them. Why raise them from the dead just to torture them forever? Again, just sick stuff you believe.
@misterdeity God does know....but he allows the weeds to grow up along with the Wheat. If a farmer sees weeds growing in his fields....should he risk ruining the wheat to get rid of the weeds? NO. He waits until the harvest comes and separates - the weeds from the wheat. God knows those that LOVE him, that Seek him. He knows the Sheep from the Goats. I don't know all the answers - but God is JUST, Fair and true. I trust in him - but are YOU wheat or weed? Time is ticking.
@JMMCL16 Not a good analogy. God is all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-loving. There should be no weeds in the first place. If there are weeds, He messed up. Second, you don't know all the answers, but presume to tell me about things which you can't possibly know? You don't trust God. You trust people who lived 3000 years ago and didn't know anything about the world we lived in -- they thought the Earth was 6,000 years old, for heaven's sake! You offer ignorance and nothing more.
@misterdeity OK if there should be NO weeds, then what are you? You do not believe in God - though his creation is all around you. You Sin, but think that God should be Just - and let sinners into heaven - or at least let them have PART of him in some kind of existence, not realising that only where God is, is there LIFE, beauty, peace, joy...all those things come from God and the Sun shines on the Good and the Evil (at present), but when they die, the Soul goes to HELL or Heaven.
@JMMCL16 God didn't have to create HELL. Nor did He have to create anyone He knew would end up there. He knows all, remember. If you had the choice, would you create someone knowing that they're going to spend eternity being tortured and suffering endlessly? How do you not see that as sick? These are disgusting beliefs, and you're making God look like the biggest ass who ever existed. If there is a God, you're mocking him so much better than I ever could.
@misterdeity You call God unfair. But what does God owe you? He has given you life, he has actually entered this earth and suffered as a human, to take on himself the Sin - that JUSTICE demmands a price for. Sin, must be accounted for. Should murderers go to heaven? Paedos? Rapistis? What about Liars? Big lliars, small liars??? Should thieves go to heaven? Where is the line drawn - sin is sin - only through Jesus do we receive full pardon. We just have to accept. Gods Gift, FREE.
@JMMCL16 God owes me everything if he created me. Just like I owed my daughter everything -- that's the job of a father. Do you have kids? Would you treat your kids like God treats us? Can you imagine offering your kid a gift and then telling them that if they don't like or want it, you'll torture them forever? Again, your idea of God is sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. Then on top of that, He orders genocide, the murder of homosexuals, non-virgins, etc.. Sick, I tell you. SICK!!!
@misterdeity When we are truly sorry for our Sins, big, small, whatever....if we acknowledge that we are full of faults, pride, hatred.....unforgiveness....than God can Step in, change us, takes the sin from us - these things are SPIRITUAL, do understand you need to be talking to God, not me. I do believe in Christ Jesus, without doubt, because within my Spirit and in my life I have the evidence. You must seek for yourself. I can tell you, if you seek with all your heart you WILL find. God.
@JMMCL16 Been there. Done that. I've even said the prayer asking forgiveness and welcoming Jesus into my heart. . So I'm covered. I'm saved. Don't worry about me. I don't believe in God or Jesus, and I did it completely as a joke, but I've said the prayer and I'm forgiven. So, if you're right, God will forgive me and let me into heaven just like you. No worries, mate!
God made man. He did wish he hadn't bothered - once he saw how they murdered, raped, caused mayhem...worshipped sticks and stones. But he had made man...with a free will. He could have just made robots if he wanted something which will OBEY without thought. We were made for fellowship with God. Literally Gods offspring. BUT...man became seduced by sin and satan...turned his back on God. Let me ask YOU a question. Have you got your back to God? He didn't make hell for people. NO.
@JMMCL16 Well, why did God make Satan & allow man to become seduced? Clearly, Satan was not needed for free will, since God obviously had free will before he created Satan, right? And what about Heaven? There will be no Satan there. Will we have free will, or will we just be robots? And what if people just don't want fellowship with God? Why not create a nice place for them to hang together. That's the loving thing to do. Torturing them forever is just pure evil. Why can't you see that?
@JMMCL16 "once he saw" ??? you know you're talking about a supposedly omniscient all knowing being right? And if he didnt make hell for people, who'd he make it for, squirrels? (mmm bbq rodent). Cause since he made everything, he made man, and a hell for them to roast in (supposedly).
@JMMCL16 It's people that share such a deluded view of the universe and underestimate the magnificence of it, how we (the undilluded) believe that it really came in to being (dare I say evolved), what's in it and how it's constructed that sometimes make me wish that I did believe in a God. This is due to the fact that when I hear your misguided pontifications I am filled with a desire to pray for you to come to your senses!
@JMMCL16 It's people that share such a deluded view of the universe and underestimate the magnificence of it, how we (the undiluted) believe that it really came in to being (dare I say evolved), what's in it and how it's constructed that sometimes make me wish that I did believe in a God. This is due to the fact that when I hear your misguided pontifical ideologies, I am filled with a desire to pray for you to come to your senses!
@khaughey66Sorry, but I don't think its deluded to believe that such a magnificent universe....was CREATED by intelligent design, rather than IT JUST WENT BOOM and then came together.....and you know.....kangaroos turned into lions......apes came down from the trees and started talking,......fish came out of the water and started walking.....you know the song? That is deluded.
Jesus is Lord. God is not mocked, whatever a man sows he reaps. God is watching, God is listening.....one day every knee will bow, every tongue confess that Jesus is Lord. You may laugh at Phelps, but you need to look at yourselves. Judge yourself, lest ye be judged......
@JMMCL16 What do you mean, "God is not mocked"? Of course He is. But He's mocked most by those who say He is as He's represented in the Bible -- a genocidal, homophobic, misogynist pig. But I'm happy to join with the Jews and Christians in mocking God. They've done such a good job!
@misterdeity God ultimately is not mocked.....in that....what we sow we reap. To life eternal in heaven, or destruction in hell. Christians are not perfect...but they have accepted Christ and are on a path, not that they are perfect...but through Christ they become perfected in him. Those who are not christians, those who reject Christ and mock the Free gift of Forgiveness...they too are not perfect BUT they are on a road to hell.
@JMMCL16 That's the best you've got? Really? Threats of Hell AGAIN?!!! Jesus Christ, you've got to offer something better than that. Your God is so petty that if someone doesn't believe someone else's version of what happened 2-4,000 years ago, He's gonna torture you forever? Why would anyone want to be a part of that? That's just sick, and people who worship such a Being are mentally ill. Why can't you see that? If you're going to believe in God, why not a loving God instead of that asshat?
@misterdeity Its not a threat of hell, its the reality of a hell....we are ALL destined to go to. We chose and still choose things that are called 'sin' (old fashioned word, still true). Jesus came to this world as Godman - because we were unable to help ourselves. He has done everything he can to STOP us going to hell. But people like yourself...still belittle God, mock him, blaspheme...you see...you are no different to any other sinner. Your only hope is Jesus. But it is YOUR choice.
@JMMCL16 Well, it's your God who set this whole thing up in the first place. I'm born with original sin -- through no fault of my own. And He supposedly knew whether or not I was going to burn before I was born. Why allow a being to come into existence knowing that being is destined to be tortured for all eternity? What kind of sick MoFo does something like that? This is the God you worship? This sick, sadistic, torturer of beings? Why would you do that and want others to do it as well?
Dear Mr. Deity. About the camel, the reason is that the scriptures, being palimpsests, made it kinda hard to translate, specially since there are three languages involved, so there are a lot of mistranslations. The arameic word for camel also means rope, and that makes a lot more sense... well as much as you can expect from a fairy tale written by superstitious people in the middle of the desert.
Love these series! I get most of the references and jokes (i think), but what did "reaching for the H" mean here? Heroin? Hydrogen..? I get the feeling im way off lol. Big fan from Norway
@misterdeity Rev: 21:8 I think... More interestingly are the verses that talk about "The Book of Life" Like it's a guest book. "Sorry we don't see your name here.... Mr...." "Pat Robertson; I'm a close personal friend of Jesus." "He says he's never talked to you before in his afterlife." "This has to be a mistake." (Sorry - stuff just pops into my head and I have to say it.)
@stevenmatthewbritz - By all means, please, correct us with your correct idea of who god is. Have you even bothered to read the immoral nonsense that was cobbled together to constitute the Bible? Your arrogance is laughable.
@stevenmatthewbritz its a satire, and people who preach and claim they know what God is like, seriously... Its kind of pointing out some of the completly assine things religious people says. And oooo I do not think the makers belive in God. Its a satire, grasp the point, they make fun of stupidity... I am not bashing religion, but take its easier for a camel to pass threw the eye of a needle than a richman get into heaven. So does that mean that everyone on TBN wont be in heaven???
@stevenmatthewbritz As opposed to all the accurate portrayals of who "God really is"? How do you know who god really is? So far no one can agree. What an asine statement.
@stevenmatthewbritz The funny thing is this guy (steven) here claims and is cocksure he knows "who God really is". Empirical evidence? Humbug! I'm certain his sole basis for "knowing" is a 2000 y/o hodgepodge of stories perpetrated by a misogynistic, homophobic, and genocidal "God".
@ourabouras John the Baptist was (allegedly) sent ahead of Jesus, a "fore runner," if you would, announcing the coming of the Messiah, clearing the path for the Lord, etc. etc. He was also beheaded, so if you look closely, you'll see lots of head & neck type gags in this episode. :)
(And don't blame your mom for not sending you to bible school; the info tends to come in handy from time to time, but the delivery... *shudder* Let's just say that "close-minded" doesn't come close to covering it.)
Mr. Deity, I know you have a perfect plan, a perfect schedule, and that it's very ... "human," of me to ask, but, isn't it about time for you to release a new truth?
I can't convert souls without new information from 2,000 years ago.
@k7leetha You are correct. I had hoped to have a new episode up by now, but I have been terribly ill for some time now. I will get one up asap. Thanks.
@misterdeity Come on, that's no excuse! You're the Deity; didn't you film "Mr. Deity and the Wrong Number" and "Mr. Deity and the Woman" while self-describedly sick as a dog?
@misterdeity In your own words, "If you don't get your drug, you start acting crazy." I've actually considered praying for you to get better...or would that be for the Deity to make himself better?
Actually, "Mr. Deity and the Wrong Number" was one of my favorite performances. You underestimate yourself :-)
You know, I can't help but notice that John is much calmer in this episode than in "Mr. Deity and the Baptist." Understandable, given the circumstances.
As an aside, I'd love to perform that "Amy's Song" for YouTube (maybe think of it as advertisement for the show?), if that's at all realistic. . .
@carriepoppy You said, "Amy is hot." I think every time someone says that, he must donate $5 to Mr. Deity. ;) You're contributing to his general anxiety. He's married to Amy. He's the one that must suffer your ceaseless ogling. Shame! ;)
my deity is awesome and he is hilarious. even as a christian I enjoy his stuff as much as enjoyed kevin smiths dogma. the difference is for me its cool coming from smith because he is a christian.
@AtheistinFundyLand That's exactly what I was going for -- that classic British tone (Monty Python to the hilt). They're definitely at the top of my comic pantheon (with Woody, Bob Newhart, etc..).
@BMHurley Alright, now calm down. This is comedy folks. I could have just as easily said US intelligence. Don't take it personally. And the French definitely resisted (some of them). They were just a little too late, and they smelled bad. ;-)
I loved the oxymoronlist, and also all the surreptitious head/neck gags;but "Chester's roasting on an open fire"? That Christmas carol is now 1000X improved!
ATTENTION EVERYONE! Pardon the expression but "Jesus Christ!" I make a simple joke about atheist not having holidays and everyone loses their freaking minds. Save your emails, IT WAS A JOKE!!!!!! .......This is why its so hard to "come out" about being an atheist! Everyone is so damn touchy. ----- My sincere apologies to Mr. Deity for this turning into such a huge debate on your otherwise wonderful page. I learned my lesson about posting stuff. ---Dragonguise.
@dragonguise Yeah, what the hell were you thinking? ;-) You must know, however, that Atheists are incredibly knowledgable (more knowledgable about the Bible than believers, as a recent study showed), so if you say something, you better be ready to back it up. 'Cause they will turn on you like Judas at the last supper.
@dragonguise I just got in on this thread, but you can imagine how touchy we atheists can be over the topic of holidays and assumptions Christians make about our attitudes and what we do for the holidays. for my own part, I "throw out the Baby Jesus, but keep the bathwater." In other words, I do all the pagan wintery solstice kinds of things, but leave the religious crap out.
Another great episode, and I love how you intro'd John! LOL But one question has been burning (no pun intended) in my mind, and that is, did you stop making episodes of "Words"?
@misterdeity Mr Deity starts with calling him "John," but almost everyone in the New Testament is called John, aren't they?. The thing is, a lot of the jokes in this piece are based on John the Baptist, and as a Bear of Very Little Brain, I missed all those cracks about losing heads, etc. until the second run through.
Eye of a needle, the name of a small door in the gates of Jeruzalem. Used after the main gate was closed to enter the city. Very difficult to get a camel through it.
I noticed something about being an atheist, you loose a lot of holidays! LOL
St. Valentines day, St. Patrick's day, Palm Sunday, Passover, Good Friday, Easter, Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Halloween (not sure about that one), Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, and the biggie, Christmas. That pretty much just leaves Independence Day, and my birthday............ Are there any atheist holidays?
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Putting a camel through the eye of a needle stems back to the times when cigarette companies put product placements in all media.
dangerouslytalented 1 week ago
"Eternity" is by far the biggest of the dumb ideas in the bible. Too lazy to quantify something? Slap a lil infinity on it to fix it up.
In the face of eternity every good or bad action becomes inconsequential. Hmmm, maybe the bible is saying our lives are pointless. That would explain the sky-daddy's gleeful exuberance towards slaughter and indifference to suffering.
Thanks for the vids, btw.
tubeturds 3 months ago in playlist Mr. Deity Season Four
The Deity that is going rouge. fantastic!
phroney 5 months ago
You can't be all-powerful without being all-knowing.
kenotube 5 months ago
@kenotube How do you know? Are you all-knowing?
misterdeity 5 months ago
@misterdeity Example: There's a planet Sprog 1 billion light years from Earth that, let's say, God doesn't know about. There is a resident on this planet, Zork who is about to be killed by a Splink. God is powerless to save Zork's life because he doesn't know he exists. QED.
kenotube 5 months ago
@kenotube That's just more of not being all knowing. He could still be all-powerful in that circumstance -- he could have saved Zork's life had he known. He just didn't know. But that again is a failure of knowledge, not power. BTW, isn't it fun pretending we could know anything about any of this?
misterdeity 5 months ago
@misterdeity Well, that was my point. He could have saved Zork's life, had he known. But since he wasn't all knowing, he didn't have the power to save his life; hence, he is not all-powerful, if he is not all-knowing. And yes, it is fun pretending. Although, I think it would be a terrible burden to be all-knowing or all-powerful.
kenotube 5 months ago
@kenotube Being all-powerful, he could travel back in time and save Zork once he finds out. But the larger point is that speaking of a Being who is "all-powerful" or "all-knowing" means absolutely nothing in the context of a personal being. These are merely concepts attached to the idea of God to make Him more palatable -- to assuage our fears, and lift our hopes. God needs to be all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-good to do that. But as a friend says, "pick any two."
misterdeity 5 months ago
@misterdeity Yes, I see your point. I guess that's why you play God and I just watch.
kenotube 5 months ago
@misterdeity
I think the point kenotube tries to make is that all-powerfulness logically necessitates all-knowingness. After all to be able to do something, you need to know how to do it. The problem with this thought is that logic doesn't need to apply to all-powerful imaginary beings, as the literature overwhelmingly shows.
arpakyna 4 months ago
@misterdeity of course an all powerful being could deliver an edict to not allow killing. Zork would be saved. A circumstance that allows all powerful to exist, without all knowing existing. To me that seems to be a simpler rebuttal. Oh but then again there is the pesky free will thing.
firehorse14701 4 months ago
Barbecue! Perfect!!!!! (she says, as she sits in the middle of Texas...)
NotMuchNU 5 months ago
Looks like God does a problem...But God made the problem aka: " Deity" unless he's what he's cracked up to be!
Davesn2u 5 months ago
These sketches are absolutely brilliant! Keep 'em coming!
Sh33un 6 months ago
You asked Jesus into your heart....but you are NOT saved...because when you are truly saved a Supernatural event takes place....the dead Spirit that was alienated from God becomes alive to God. They become born again as the old saying goes. They realise how LOST they were they are THANKFUL to God for saving them...they LOVE God will all their heart. Their Blind eyes are opened. So you said some prayer? God is not fooled. You mock God and do NOT have the faith that comes from God.
JMMCL16 6 months ago
@JMMCL16
You're amusing.
The god he's mocking, would that be the one who ordered the genocide, infanticide, incest, rape, murder, slaughter of firstborns, stoning non-virgins, homophobia, and racism?
That god? Cause that god is an asshole and deserves to be mocked always.
pele1281 6 months ago
@pele1281 Well, you should mock while you can then.....because you won't be laughing in hell. God is not mocked what a man sows he reaps. Gods standard is way, way above YOUR standard. You comment on Gods righteousness. He doesn't owe you ANYTHING. YOU turn your back on God of your own choice. God has given you FREEDOM to do so. God is merciful and the Old Testament shows the standard it takes to be sinless.... The new -God Grace....the judgement we deserve was put on Jesus.
JMMCL16 6 months ago
@JMMCL16
You are the most self-righteous person I've ever encountered. Isn't pride a sin?
pele1281 6 months ago
@JMMCL16 The old testament shows how much mercy you can expect as well, which is not much.
Can you say flood?
rynther 1 month ago
@JMMCL16 I can't help it if God transform me. I can't create a Supernatural event! But I did have a very similar experience when I left religion -- realized how lost I'd been, was thankful to be free of religion, loved my new perspective and the tools to access supernatural claims, and my eyes were open! Before that, I did everything you said with great sincerity (when I was deeply religious) and got no supernatural transforming event. Your God is sleeping on the job! Good thing Jesus covers me!
misterdeity 6 months ago
@misterdeity Jesus does not cover you. Sorry, you don't really know Jesus - you may have read the Bible - but you are right God did not transform you by his Spirit. If he had....you would have known!
JMMCL16 6 months ago
@JMMCL16 So then, what is someone like me supposed to do? I used to be a true believer (very hardcore), I looked into it using my brain and the reasoning skills God gave me, and now I simply can't look myself in the mirror and say that I believe some guy (who may be pure legend) was God. If it's all about what you believe, and I simply don't (and can't or won't force myself to lie and say that I do), what am I supposed to do?
misterdeity 6 months ago
@JMMCL16 Whoops. Should have read, "I can't help it if God didn't transform me."
misterdeity 6 months ago
@JMMCL16 how many other religions claim to bring salvation? how am i supposed to know that yours is the one that really does?
BlueEnigma34 6 months ago
@BlueEnigma34 Just take a look at one of my music videos - Don Moen....or Michael W Smith....watch what happens when people worship the God they KNOW. Hindus, Muslims....they do not have that worship of the Soul....because they have head knowledge only. Also, preachers can go in to India or Africa and preach via a trnaslator about Jesus - the Power of God and the Gospel convicts people right where they are. How does that happen in any other religion or any other name but by the name of Jesus
JMMCL16 6 months ago
@JMMCL16 I'm not seeing any Hindu or Muslim preachers going to Africa or India or anywhere else for that matter... I read the gospel, why am I not converted on the spot?
BlueEnigma34 6 months ago
@JMMCL16 You are so naive to think that kind of thing only happens in Christianity. Mormons, Jehovah's Witnesses, Muslims, Jews, etc... all have that kind of thing happen. In fact, Islam and Mormonism are both growing faster than Christianity. Furthermore, only 1 in 7 people in the world is a Christian. You are simply uninformed and have a very provincial view of the world. This is exactly how Christianity survives -- keeping people ignorant of other ways.
misterdeity 6 months ago
@JMMCL16
What a silly mythology you believe in!
ZelphKinderhook 6 months ago
Super good Dudes! Love your stuff!
TDKinTOKYO 7 months ago
He covers my sin - yes, because I have genuinely acknowledged my sins, I have asked Jesus to be my saviour and vowed to follow him. Yes, I still fail, but I know God see's my failings and loves me because I love him. Jesus said we need to be BORN AGAIN - its a spiritual birth, God makes a change deep in our spirit, when we sincerely seek him.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 Well, how can I sincerely seek someone I don't believe exists? Again, it seems you want me to lie, which would just be another sin. Why aren't my doubt and insincerity just two more sins that Jesus' death will cover if you're right?
misterdeity 8 months ago
@misterdeity Jesus has covered ALL sins - for those who ask him to do so. You do not know he exists, because your eyes are blinded to the spiritual, the amazing thing is, your eyes can be opened by Gods Spirit - it does take a step of faith, but God will meet you in that step. Honestly. Doubt is understandable, but when we see OUR sin, the way WE have messed up this world, with our Sin - when we ask God to open our eyes to HIS purity, holiness and justice - then we say Amazing Grace!!!
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 I fully acknowledge that if your God exists, He created me sinful and because of that I am a sinner (I don't know how I could be anything but when He's stacked the deck like that). And I've asked Jesus to cover my sins if He exists. But I can't honestly say that I belief something if I don't. And if I'm continuing to sin by being faithless, why isn't that covered -- it's just another sin? Does God not want me to be honest? If I don't believe the Jesus story, what am I supposed to do?
misterdeity 8 months ago
@misterdeity He hasn't stacked the deck like that....we stack the deck like that...with every lie and every spiteful word or deed - yes we are human and fallen and deeply flawed and I admire your honesty in admiting that you do not believe in the Jesus story. That is where God does step in. When we are at that point when we can honestly say "Yes this is me, I AM a sinner, but I don't believe" if you are open God can and will show you as I CANNOT, that he is real. It is a supernatural thing.
JMMCL16 7 months ago
@JMMCL16 Of course He's stacked the deck. I am born into sin in your word view. I didn't CHOOSE that, He did. This is another immoral part of your belief system. We are all paying the price for someone else's sin (Adam -- who, btw, never existed. The Earth isn't 6,000 years old, and death has been going on for billions of years). I have always been open to being wrong about God's existence, but so far God has shown me nothing. And the Jesus story is simply unbelievable.
misterdeity 7 months ago
@misterdeity Adam paid for his sin....you must pay for yours. You either belong to God or satan. You are either going to hell and then to the Lake of Fire of to Heaven. You ARE aware of right and wrong. You are without any excuses. Jesus offers you Life in heaven, and peace on this earth.....which path will you choose?
JMMCL16 7 months ago
@JMMCL16 You're not hearing me. I asked Jesus into my heart. I'm covered. If He is real, I'm saved. I think it's a totally immoral story -- the idea of putting one man to death for all of our sins and for the sin we didn't even commit, but was simply attached because some man (who didn't even really exist -- Adam) partook of a metaphorical piece of fruit some 6,000 years ago. BTW, if you believe in the Adam and Eve story, how has all this death been going on for billions of years?
misterdeity 7 months ago
Respond to this video... Continued........and as it is a Supernatural spiritual God - he needs to reach into our flesh and blood bodies and this is why Gods SPIRIT is on the earth. If you ARE open, to REALLY know the truth and you ASK God to show you, BECAUSE you cannot of yourself believe you NEED that evidence of Faith, then God will MOVE through his SPIRIT. He will open your eyes. Are you ready to see?
JMMCL16 7 months ago
@JMMCL16 I've been ready for 20 years. But do you realize that people of every other religion believe the same thing about their God -- the Mormons, the JWs, Muslims, Jews, 7th Day Adventists? You can't KNOW anything this way. What if God came down, proved that He was God with all kinds of miracles so that no one could doubt. Then, what if He told you that you needed to join His one true faith -- Islam? Would you dump your faith in Jesus?
misterdeity 7 months ago
@JMMCL16 I'm going for a life of sin followed by a last minute deathbed conversion. So long sucker.
jacksawild 7 months ago
@jacksawild You may have a heart attack, or get hit by a car.....you may not have the chance to do a last minute confession. Plus, God knows the heart and he will know how genuiine you are. Today is the day of Salvation. Tomorrow may be too late. What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world, but loses his soul.
JMMCL16 7 months ago
@JMMCL16 My problem with that is that you are messaging me on a computer, which I presume belongs to you even though JC was quite clear that to follow him you should sell your possessions and give the money to the poor. It's difficult to listen to someone who ignores the parts they don't like. Mtw 19:21 Lk 12:33
jacksawild 7 months ago
@jacksawild Uhhhh?!!!! Possessions should always come secondary, but I think JC would approve of my USING the computer to pass on the gospel.. I go into the world and preach the gospel....from my laptop. Pretty Good Idea. I am sure God would be very pleased!
JMMCL16 7 months ago
@JMMCL16 I see your "I am sure God would be very pleased!" and I raise you Jeremiah 13:15. And I call.
jacksawild 7 months ago
@JMMCL16
Slow down there big guy. We know you love your religion, but you're forgetting the 11th commandment:
THOU SHALT KEEP THY GOD TO THYSELF.
Also, you ARE aware that pretty much every religion on earth claims to have the "one true path" to salvation... right?
pele1281 6 months ago
If you asked Jesus to be your Saviour as a joke - then God knows that! He knows our hearts......people only see the outside. We are all good at putting on acts, but God knows the truth and he sees what no one else see.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 But I don't believe the Jesus story. If I said I did, I'd be lying and he'd know that too. This way, i've done what He said to do and should be covered if you're right. Yes, I'm doubtful and insincere. But those are just two more of my sins that Jesus' death is supposed to cover, right? Why does he cover your sins and not mine?
misterdeity 8 months ago
GOOD QUESTION! God made satan as LUCIFER the highest ANGEL in heaven. Magnificent he wanted to rise ABOVE God. He rebelled against God and a third of the angels went with lucifer who now fallen....became satan and the fallen angels demons. If people don't want fellowship with God......at all.....then you take all the God out (all that is the best and most beautiful)and you HAVE hell. Without God...at all it is just that.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 1. If God knew Lucifer would do that, why create him? 2. After He rebelled, why not just annihilate him? 3. If you're all-good and all-powerful, you can surely make a nice Earth-like place for people who don't want fellowship with God (because they disapprove of the genocide, killing of homosexuals, non-virgins, ect... you know, people of good taste and high morals). Or, just annihilate them. Why raise them from the dead just to torture them forever? Again, just sick stuff you believe.
misterdeity 8 months ago
@misterdeity God does know....but he allows the weeds to grow up along with the Wheat. If a farmer sees weeds growing in his fields....should he risk ruining the wheat to get rid of the weeds? NO. He waits until the harvest comes and separates - the weeds from the wheat. God knows those that LOVE him, that Seek him. He knows the Sheep from the Goats. I don't know all the answers - but God is JUST, Fair and true. I trust in him - but are YOU wheat or weed? Time is ticking.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 Not a good analogy. God is all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-loving. There should be no weeds in the first place. If there are weeds, He messed up. Second, you don't know all the answers, but presume to tell me about things which you can't possibly know? You don't trust God. You trust people who lived 3000 years ago and didn't know anything about the world we lived in -- they thought the Earth was 6,000 years old, for heaven's sake! You offer ignorance and nothing more.
misterdeity 8 months ago
@misterdeity OK if there should be NO weeds, then what are you? You do not believe in God - though his creation is all around you. You Sin, but think that God should be Just - and let sinners into heaven - or at least let them have PART of him in some kind of existence, not realising that only where God is, is there LIFE, beauty, peace, joy...all those things come from God and the Sun shines on the Good and the Evil (at present), but when they die, the Soul goes to HELL or Heaven.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 God didn't have to create HELL. Nor did He have to create anyone He knew would end up there. He knows all, remember. If you had the choice, would you create someone knowing that they're going to spend eternity being tortured and suffering endlessly? How do you not see that as sick? These are disgusting beliefs, and you're making God look like the biggest ass who ever existed. If there is a God, you're mocking him so much better than I ever could.
misterdeity 8 months ago
@misterdeity You call God unfair. But what does God owe you? He has given you life, he has actually entered this earth and suffered as a human, to take on himself the Sin - that JUSTICE demmands a price for. Sin, must be accounted for. Should murderers go to heaven? Paedos? Rapistis? What about Liars? Big lliars, small liars??? Should thieves go to heaven? Where is the line drawn - sin is sin - only through Jesus do we receive full pardon. We just have to accept. Gods Gift, FREE.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 God owes me everything if he created me. Just like I owed my daughter everything -- that's the job of a father. Do you have kids? Would you treat your kids like God treats us? Can you imagine offering your kid a gift and then telling them that if they don't like or want it, you'll torture them forever? Again, your idea of God is sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. Then on top of that, He orders genocide, the murder of homosexuals, non-virgins, etc.. Sick, I tell you. SICK!!!
misterdeity 8 months ago
@misterdeity When we are truly sorry for our Sins, big, small, whatever....if we acknowledge that we are full of faults, pride, hatred.....unforgiveness....than God can Step in, change us, takes the sin from us - these things are SPIRITUAL, do understand you need to be talking to God, not me. I do believe in Christ Jesus, without doubt, because within my Spirit and in my life I have the evidence. You must seek for yourself. I can tell you, if you seek with all your heart you WILL find. God.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 Been there. Done that. I've even said the prayer asking forgiveness and welcoming Jesus into my heart. . So I'm covered. I'm saved. Don't worry about me. I don't believe in God or Jesus, and I did it completely as a joke, but I've said the prayer and I'm forgiven. So, if you're right, God will forgive me and let me into heaven just like you. No worries, mate!
misterdeity 8 months ago
God made man. He did wish he hadn't bothered - once he saw how they murdered, raped, caused mayhem...worshipped sticks and stones. But he had made man...with a free will. He could have just made robots if he wanted something which will OBEY without thought. We were made for fellowship with God. Literally Gods offspring. BUT...man became seduced by sin and satan...turned his back on God. Let me ask YOU a question. Have you got your back to God? He didn't make hell for people. NO.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 Well, why did God make Satan & allow man to become seduced? Clearly, Satan was not needed for free will, since God obviously had free will before he created Satan, right? And what about Heaven? There will be no Satan there. Will we have free will, or will we just be robots? And what if people just don't want fellowship with God? Why not create a nice place for them to hang together. That's the loving thing to do. Torturing them forever is just pure evil. Why can't you see that?
misterdeity 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 "once he saw" ??? you know you're talking about a supposedly omniscient all knowing being right? And if he didnt make hell for people, who'd he make it for, squirrels? (mmm bbq rodent). Cause since he made everything, he made man, and a hell for them to roast in (supposedly).
WhisperShift 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 It's people that share such a deluded view of the universe and underestimate the magnificence of it, how we (the undilluded) believe that it really came in to being (dare I say evolved), what's in it and how it's constructed that sometimes make me wish that I did believe in a God. This is due to the fact that when I hear your misguided pontifications I am filled with a desire to pray for you to come to your senses!
khaughey66 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 It's people that share such a deluded view of the universe and underestimate the magnificence of it, how we (the undiluted) believe that it really came in to being (dare I say evolved), what's in it and how it's constructed that sometimes make me wish that I did believe in a God. This is due to the fact that when I hear your misguided pontifical ideologies, I am filled with a desire to pray for you to come to your senses!
khaughey66 8 months ago
@khaughey66Sorry, but I don't think its deluded to believe that such a magnificent universe....was CREATED by intelligent design, rather than IT JUST WENT BOOM and then came together.....and you know.....kangaroos turned into lions......apes came down from the trees and started talking,......fish came out of the water and started walking.....you know the song? That is deluded.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
In all technicality, John the Baptist was somewhat akin to today's hellfire preachers. He wasn't quite the same thing, but he came close.
stitch99 8 months ago
Jesus is Lord. God is not mocked, whatever a man sows he reaps. God is watching, God is listening.....one day every knee will bow, every tongue confess that Jesus is Lord. You may laugh at Phelps, but you need to look at yourselves. Judge yourself, lest ye be judged......
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 What do you mean, "God is not mocked"? Of course He is. But He's mocked most by those who say He is as He's represented in the Bible -- a genocidal, homophobic, misogynist pig. But I'm happy to join with the Jews and Christians in mocking God. They've done such a good job!
misterdeity 8 months ago
@misterdeity God ultimately is not mocked.....in that....what we sow we reap. To life eternal in heaven, or destruction in hell. Christians are not perfect...but they have accepted Christ and are on a path, not that they are perfect...but through Christ they become perfected in him. Those who are not christians, those who reject Christ and mock the Free gift of Forgiveness...they too are not perfect BUT they are on a road to hell.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 That's the best you've got? Really? Threats of Hell AGAIN?!!! Jesus Christ, you've got to offer something better than that. Your God is so petty that if someone doesn't believe someone else's version of what happened 2-4,000 years ago, He's gonna torture you forever? Why would anyone want to be a part of that? That's just sick, and people who worship such a Being are mentally ill. Why can't you see that? If you're going to believe in God, why not a loving God instead of that asshat?
misterdeity 8 months ago
@misterdeity Its not a threat of hell, its the reality of a hell....we are ALL destined to go to. We chose and still choose things that are called 'sin' (old fashioned word, still true). Jesus came to this world as Godman - because we were unable to help ourselves. He has done everything he can to STOP us going to hell. But people like yourself...still belittle God, mock him, blaspheme...you see...you are no different to any other sinner. Your only hope is Jesus. But it is YOUR choice.
JMMCL16 8 months ago
@JMMCL16 Well, it's your God who set this whole thing up in the first place. I'm born with original sin -- through no fault of my own. And He supposedly knew whether or not I was going to burn before I was born. Why allow a being to come into existence knowing that being is destined to be tortured for all eternity? What kind of sick MoFo does something like that? This is the God you worship? This sick, sadistic, torturer of beings? Why would you do that and want others to do it as well?
misterdeity 8 months ago
This is the Phelps family's God.
Wittgensteinism 9 months ago
Dear Mr. Deity. About the camel, the reason is that the scriptures, being palimpsests, made it kinda hard to translate, specially since there are three languages involved, so there are a lot of mistranslations. The arameic word for camel also means rope, and that makes a lot more sense... well as much as you can expect from a fairy tale written by superstitious people in the middle of the desert.
jonnyqh 10 months ago
lmao "Wow...good lawyer."
Burning0Lilac 11 months ago
Hahaha...great stuffs...
mykegoh 11 months ago
lol decapitation jokes
deathman1021 11 months ago
"And what would happen to all the good people who just don't believe?"
"Barbecue."
bogartnumbertwo 1 year ago
Love these series! I get most of the references and jokes (i think), but what did "reaching for the H" mean here? Heroin? Hydrogen..? I get the feeling im way off lol. Big fan from Norway
Ridabu 1 year ago
@Ridabu In America, the show faucets have either an "H" or a "C" for hot and cold. Get it?
misterdeity 11 months ago
Comment removed
Ridabu 11 months ago
@misterdeity Ah, i knew it was right in front of me. I even checked urbandictionary and everything :) Thanx
Ridabu 11 months ago
Great Job! You know "If" he is out there its got to go something like that......
seeker6789 1 year ago
you guys are great!:) i'm posting your stuff all over my sites.
diesect33 1 year ago
So Larry is Uranus?
Sabohaque 1 year ago
"dying", "cutting edge", "lose my head", "stick my neck out", "head of the pack", "light-headed".
LOL :D
rwandrall1 1 year ago
"But they get used to it." ... "two seconds later you're reaching for the 'H' " ROFL!!!!
DerkaSherpaDerka 1 year ago
"But they get used to it." ... "two seconds later you're reaching for the 'H' " ROFL!!!!
DerkaSherpaDerka 1 year ago
Completely warped idea of who God really is. Terrible video.
stevenmatthewbritz 1 year ago
@stevenmatthewbritz It may be a warped view of who God is -- but it's directly from the Bible.
misterdeity 1 year ago
@misterdeity Rev: 21:8 I think... More interestingly are the verses that talk about "The Book of Life" Like it's a guest book. "Sorry we don't see your name here.... Mr...." "Pat Robertson; I'm a close personal friend of Jesus." "He says he's never talked to you before in his afterlife." "This has to be a mistake." (Sorry - stuff just pops into my head and I have to say it.)
korusi 11 months ago
@stevenmatthewbritz - By all means, please, correct us with your correct idea of who god is. Have you even bothered to read the immoral nonsense that was cobbled together to constitute the Bible? Your arrogance is laughable.
MaitreyaRocket 1 year ago
@stevenmatthewbritz Yeah, no, he pretty much got it exactly right.
Maphysto 1 year ago
@stevenmatthewbritz its a satire, and people who preach and claim they know what God is like, seriously... Its kind of pointing out some of the completly assine things religious people says. And oooo I do not think the makers belive in God. Its a satire, grasp the point, they make fun of stupidity... I am not bashing religion, but take its easier for a camel to pass threw the eye of a needle than a richman get into heaven. So does that mean that everyone on TBN wont be in heaven???
ASexyChef 1 year ago
@stevenmatthewbritz As opposed to all the accurate portrayals of who "God really is"? How do you know who god really is? So far no one can agree. What an asine statement.
newcoyote 10 months ago
@stevenmatthewbritz The funny thing is this guy (steven) here claims and is cocksure he knows "who God really is". Empirical evidence? Humbug! I'm certain his sole basis for "knowing" is a 2000 y/o hodgepodge of stories perpetrated by a misogynistic, homophobic, and genocidal "God".
gemulikeit 9 months ago
Fuck you godaddy advert.
Tehtog 1 year ago
Re: John not getting his phone to synch with the tablet... was the 'voice in the wilderness' mainly just saying "Can you hear me now?"
DragonSporks 1 year ago
i totally missed the whole john "fore runner" bit due to my lack of bible school, thanks mom. could someone help me out?
besides that this was a perfect episode i couldn't stop laughing
ourabouras 1 year ago
@ourabouras John the Baptist was (allegedly) sent ahead of Jesus, a "fore runner," if you would, announcing the coming of the Messiah, clearing the path for the Lord, etc. etc. He was also beheaded, so if you look closely, you'll see lots of head & neck type gags in this episode. :)
(And don't blame your mom for not sending you to bible school; the info tends to come in handy from time to time, but the delivery... *shudder* Let's just say that "close-minded" doesn't come close to covering it.)
DragonSporks 1 year ago
just what is a "region of reprimand" anywayz?
ZachsMind 1 year ago
I love his face when he says "I was thinking about burning them forever in a lake of fire" at 2:25
Cerberus889 1 year ago
mr deity has such a nice, warm and soothing voice :D
j0hnnytamb0rine 1 year ago
I think I am suffering fatal withdrawals. Need more cowbel...err deity!!!
jwissick 1 year ago
Mr. Deity, I know you have a perfect plan, a perfect schedule, and that it's very ... "human," of me to ask, but, isn't it about time for you to release a new truth?
I can't convert souls without new information from 2,000 years ago.
k7leetha 1 year ago
@k7leetha You are correct. I had hoped to have a new episode up by now, but I have been terribly ill for some time now. I will get one up asap. Thanks.
misterdeity 1 year ago
@misterdeity Come on, that's no excuse! You're the Deity; didn't you film "Mr. Deity and the Wrong Number" and "Mr. Deity and the Woman" while self-describedly sick as a dog?
ianmathwiz7 1 year ago
@ianmathwiz7 Exactly! And those are my least favorite performances. The next episode needs a healthy Deity. I'm nearly there. Patience.
misterdeity 1 year ago
@misterdeity In your own words, "If you don't get your drug, you start acting crazy." I've actually considered praying for you to get better...or would that be for the Deity to make himself better?
Actually, "Mr. Deity and the Wrong Number" was one of my favorite performances. You underestimate yourself :-)
ianmathwiz7 1 year ago
@misterdeity - You do have "forever" to work with ... Take YOUR time ...
MaitreyaRocket 1 year ago
You know, I can't help but notice that John is much calmer in this episode than in "Mr. Deity and the Baptist." Understandable, given the circumstances.
As an aside, I'd love to perform that "Amy's Song" for YouTube (maybe think of it as advertisement for the show?), if that's at all realistic. . .
ianmathwiz7 1 year ago
Somehow I just juxtaposed Kazzzo's "masturbating" reference and rwandrall1's "head" references. I feel dirty.
AtheistinFundyLand 1 year ago
I only got all the "head" references after hearing it a second time...WIN !
rwandrall1 1 year ago
Hmmm, masturbating or Palin's Alaska...If I had to pick one evil.
Ok, I've made my choice.
Back in five minutes.
Kazzzo 1 year ago
@Kazzzo Bwahahahaha!
AtheistinFundyLand 1 year ago
Amy is hot.
carriepoppy 1 year ago
@carriepoppy You said, "Amy is hot." I think every time someone says that, he must donate $5 to Mr. Deity. ;) You're contributing to his general anxiety. He's married to Amy. He's the one that must suffer your ceaseless ogling. Shame! ;)
AtheistinFundyLand 1 year ago
@AtheistinFundyLand Yes, well, you may notice Amy isn't in this video, making mine the meta-joke of the century.
carriepoppy 1 year ago
@carriepoppy :D Very subtle!
AtheistinFundyLand 1 year ago
@carriepoppy You wouldn't happen to be the same Carrie Poppy who played Ms. Psyche in Mr. Deity and the Psych exam, would you?
ianmathwiz7 1 year ago
@ianmathwiz7 The rumors are true.
carriepoppy 1 year ago
@carriepoppy Great, I'm honored. You did a great job, btw. Do you know of any possibility of you appearing again at all?
ianmathwiz7 1 year ago
@ianmathwiz7 If it is His will, Ian.
carriepoppy 1 year ago
@carriepoppy lol. Maybe if we fill up His voicemail with requests, he'll finally grant it.
ianmathwiz7 1 year ago
my deity is awesome and he is hilarious. even as a christian I enjoy his stuff as much as enjoyed kevin smiths dogma. the difference is for me its cool coming from smith because he is a christian.
glennjridge 1 year ago
@glennjridge And supercool coming from me because I'm an Atheist?
misterdeity 1 year ago
So, tomorrow is 2011. I'm assuming we get a new episode. I need my fix. :)
AtheistinFundyLand 1 year ago
@AtheistinFundyLand Coming soon.
misterdeity 1 year ago
@misterdeity Yea! Hoorah! Woohoo! Yippee! Yee-haw! w00t!
...
OK seriously: I like your show. :)
AtheistinFundyLand 1 year ago
"Chester's roasting on an open fire" Haha ... lmao
otherwisesaid 1 year ago
Oh no - I only get paid in AUD :(
adamw100 1 year ago
"Johnny, Johnny, Johnny...what can we do with Johnny? ....4 Runner!" That's absolutely brilliant!!
rkkrah 1 year ago
God's Archie Bunker.
granddad2002 1 year ago
@misterdeity maybe i am insane with a touch of Alzheimer's but i don't understand the whole forerunner joke....
am i in the wrong place....
here i was, thinking that i could relate ; )
azmanabdula 1 year ago
@azmanabdula
John The Baptist is considered to be a forerunner of Jesus.. Must have sucked to end up with his head on a plate just because he drove a Toyota. :)
mitua604 1 year ago
@mitua604 LMAO
thanks man...... i appreciate that......
azmanabdula 1 year ago
Palin's Alaska. :-)
Underlings 1 year ago
Best episode since Mr D and the Planes.
crocswsocks 1 year ago
Brian, you are a genius!
MAR4168 1 year ago
As part as my 12 step--er, I mean 13 step--program, I am obligated to tell Tom Vilot he did an awesome job as Johnny, um, John.
AtheistinFundyLand 1 year ago
"Well, they get used to it" reminds me of "She turned me into a newt! [uncomfortable glances] I got better."
AtheistinFundyLand 1 year ago
@AtheistinFundyLand That's exactly what I was going for -- that classic British tone (Monty Python to the hilt). They're definitely at the top of my comic pantheon (with Woody, Bob Newhart, etc..).
misterdeity 1 year ago
So "French resistance" is an oxymoron? You wouldn't find it so funny if the USA had been occupied by the Nazis.
BMHurley 1 year ago
@BMHurley Alright, now calm down. This is comedy folks. I could have just as easily said US intelligence. Don't take it personally. And the French definitely resisted (some of them). They were just a little too late, and they smelled bad. ;-)
misterdeity 1 year ago
...Palin's Alaska... XD
I loved the oxymoronlist, and also all the surreptitious head/neck gags;but "Chester's roasting on an open fire"? That Christmas carol is now 1000X improved!
DragonSporks 1 year ago
I really am not headless. Not yet, anyway ....
tvilot 1 year ago
ATTENTION EVERYONE! Pardon the expression but "Jesus Christ!" I make a simple joke about atheist not having holidays and everyone loses their freaking minds. Save your emails, IT WAS A JOKE!!!!!! .......This is why its so hard to "come out" about being an atheist! Everyone is so damn touchy. ----- My sincere apologies to Mr. Deity for this turning into such a huge debate on your otherwise wonderful page. I learned my lesson about posting stuff. ---Dragonguise.
dragonguise 1 year ago
@dragonguise Yeah, what the hell were you thinking? ;-) You must know, however, that Atheists are incredibly knowledgable (more knowledgable about the Bible than believers, as a recent study showed), so if you say something, you better be ready to back it up. 'Cause they will turn on you like Judas at the last supper.
misterdeity 1 year ago
Comment removed
BrianEdwardAshmore 1 year ago
@misterdeity Hahahahahaha, that one just made my day xD
Also, pretty practical interpretation of that verse.
BrianEdwardAshmore 1 year ago
@dragonguise I just got in on this thread, but you can imagine how touchy we atheists can be over the topic of holidays and assumptions Christians make about our attitudes and what we do for the holidays. for my own part, I "throw out the Baby Jesus, but keep the bathwater." In other words, I do all the pagan wintery solstice kinds of things, but leave the religious crap out.
ChuckyJesus666 1 year ago
So many good quotes in this one! Lots of "head" references. Pure awesomeness.
NorwayRichard 1 year ago
I love the John the Baptist joke at the end
allister2357 1 year ago
Another great episode, and I love how you intro'd John! LOL But one question has been burning (no pun intended) in my mind, and that is, did you stop making episodes of "Words"?
chrlpolk 1 year ago
@misterdeity Mr Deity starts with calling him "John," but almost everyone in the New Testament is called John, aren't they?. The thing is, a lot of the jokes in this piece are based on John the Baptist, and as a Bear of Very Little Brain, I missed all those cracks about losing heads, etc. until the second run through.
CoyoteAussie 1 year ago
They just keep coming
another classic from Mr D and the tream
gerard1875 1 year ago
Poor John...a life of eating locusts and honey in the desert, then beheaded....I hope he doesn't read this...Great episode, MrD!!!
Manifestatheist 1 year ago
This one was brilliant. Barbecue :D
lagerbaer 1 year ago
Eye of a needle, the name of a small door in the gates of Jeruzalem. Used after the main gate was closed to enter the city. Very difficult to get a camel through it.
klaasb 1 year ago
Great episode, but I don't get the "forerunner" joke.
TKnightcrawler 1 year ago
Wow, I just realized that in the episodes Mr D's beard is black.
katarnant 1 year ago
LOL I hate to say it took me a minute to get who John was. Then Mr Deity said "fore-runner" and I lost it. Well freeken done!
shotwench2210 1 year ago
The makeup in this one needed blending.
Lirit331 1 year ago
Another masterpiece.....nice finishing line!
Hereticbooks 1 year ago
See, that's why I always ask about the severance package before I take the job.
*rimshot*
poetdesmond 1 year ago
666 likes 0 dislikes. Creepy.
whitehiliter 1 year ago
hey, I just noticed that 666 people like this episode...
ianmathwiz7 1 year ago
I noticed something about being an atheist, you loose a lot of holidays! LOL
St. Valentines day, St. Patrick's day, Palm Sunday, Passover, Good Friday, Easter, Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Halloween (not sure about that one), Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, and the biggie, Christmas. That pretty much just leaves Independence Day, and my birthday............ Are there any atheist holidays?
dragonguise 1 year ago