In The Know: Has Halloween Become Overcommercialized?

[Deoxysdog]

Wonderful satire of Christmas. 10/10!

[675frank]

Frightening away demons is a reason for the season! 

[dedem1315]

@ Gnostic2030 ...You realise the Onion is a comedy site, not a news one.

[Gnostic2030]

just these christian people are retread

[KieCuster]

@Gnostic2030 Yeah I know right? Cause all of this is so real and believable. A truly legitimate news source saying blasphemous things like this is offensive.

[spartan662501]

@Gnostic2030 Are you this retarded naturally or did you eat lead paint as a kid, if so you didn't eat enough. No one wants to hear you inane, idiotic, rage filled ramblings, so either go die or shut the fuck up I couldn't care less and I doubt that you would be missed.

[Gnostic2030]

fucking christian retards its the wiccan new years holiday da da your a retard 

[Gnostic2030]

fuck you and your Jesus Christ

[Gnostic2030]

IT HAS TO DO WITH MY GODDESS 

[Gnostic2030]

FUCK YOU ITS NOTHING TO DO WITH DEMONS IT'S ABOUT RESPECTING THE DEAD LOVE ONES OF YOUR FAMILY BASTEREDS

[Cavalier223]

Because someone complained about the HOWLING!!!

[MrBigEnchilada]

the whole point is to scare people...

[Sleepydog457]

You guys suck halloween is about paying respect to the dead. And getting candy after. Also how can you talk about sex being bad when none of you have evan had any.

[SamJ1986]

@daveforfun22 shut up...

[ulquiXgrimm]

Jack Skellington <3

[anonymousman555]

I want to read Hallowhy

[daveforfun22]

Ok sorry to do this but this one annoys me. usually I love the onion network I am a big fan, However Halloween is not a demon worshipping holiday thats a common misconception and manipulative lie perpetrated by oppressive christians. Halloween was originally a festival where it was believed that the dead relatives would come and visit once a year. it was demonised and manipulated by oppressive fucktards to appear demonic. In mexico you will find they still follow some of the old traditions

[sorcerb]

@daveforfun22 Surely you know it didn't start in Mexico, right? There are different holidays all around the world celebrated around the same time. It was to appease the demons in the Celtic world and as a harvest festival, which is why costumes were worn - to scare off the demons and spirits. Learn more about the topic please.

[dpDribble]

@daveforfun22 ... That's the Day of the Dead... Learn about holidays before complaining about people not understanding holidays.

[CJEJTHEDJ]

I'm still working on locating a globe.......

[levihambrick]

This seems appropriate for today.

[svenboy89]

Oh wait it's actually: Shoh shenn oie Houiney; Hop-tu-naa T'an eayst soilshean; Trol-la-laa!!!!!!!!

[svenboy89]

🎶 So-shoni oy-noy haptu-na! Kay-ar-heed-narkin HAHP-TU-NAH! 🎶

[qazzy]

The funny thing is that this is kinda true back in the day. I always thought this was creepy but funny at the same time

[catcharide56]

TAKE OUT YOUR AMULETS!!!!!

Damn you Duncan Birch!! You've doomed us all!

By the way, I can recognize Algol.

[AdamYJ]

@catcharide56 As I understand it, Algol isn't a real demon or spirit. Algol is, however a star in the constellation Perseus located roughly where Medusa's head would be. It's a shortened form of the Arabic phrase Ra's al Ghul, which means "The Demon's Head" and refers to Medusa's severed head and is also the name of a pretty cool Batman villian. By the by, the Arabic word "ghul" which means demon is the root of the English word "ghoul"

[zenfrodo]

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, ONION, THIS PAGAN LOVES YOU!! :)

[DaGavinX]

I can't locate the Earth on a globe. :(

[justicelyric]

oh heck naw did they just start signing all at once lmfao I couldnt have them in my family its one thing to have great intelligence its another to be to damn serious for no fucking reason....

[KatyPerryissooawsome]

Up until they started to sing, I thought this was legit and that these people are crazy ass holes. Ahaha (;

[tugboat2030]

@KatyPerryissooawsome The singing was the most accurate part!

[KatyPerryissooawsome]

@tugboat2030 True dat, lmfaaaoo

[soccergirl97979]

think about our wells!!!

[Iwuzhere321]

Is my Sexual Clad Sailor Outfit suitable for warding away demons?

[liamsp544]

GET OUT YOUR AMULETS

[Rostas]

I love how it says since 1896 where television didn't even exist.

[jaidaphire]

@Rostas Shows how much YOU know!

[fischerpilne]

Brilliant! (as always!) LOVED the song AND the shocking 'ghouls'-revenge' ending!

[BadVoodo0]

lol ending was awesome

[MrSleepylk]

its like they took a snapshot of my brain

[sandrsofias]

Best. Onion. Ever.

Btw, "Get out your amulets!"

[Revolution2pointO]

76% of Americans believe demons want their souls.

[Nyx00avatar]

how can this be satire?? its real... hahahaha.... except for the last part...

[cologey]

'get out your amulets', classic.

[2012singularity2012]

the fat chick with glasses isn't very funny IMO

[Revolution2pointO]

@2012singularity2012 I have been saying this for years. If you are an overweight woman, then you need to be thrown into a pit and burned, we need to get NASA working on this giant hole of fire.

[bigvuch]

I was startled when my less traditional cousins couldn't recognize the demon Hex during last year's halloween

[NickBBK]

I think this might be the most outrageous ending to an "In the Know" episode ever. And I love it.

[fpattenable]

Typical Duncan. 

[GwalaUntouch]

I think it's actually talking about christianity and xmas

[knrose10]

Dear Onion....Please Bring...In The Know back to the internet!

[NappyHeadJackie]

I'm only in it for the candy!!!!!!Sorry.

[SuperJohn719]

Earth, TX 79031 is a real city in Texas.

99.999% of Americans would be unable to locate that city

Look it up on Google Earth

[MrBigEnchilada]

@SuperJohn719 hell is also a city in england.

[lordchaos6]

haha "time spent butchering with the family"

[MckyMseNTarotCrds]

I'm sure we can all agree that guy had it coming.

[MisterSheney]

Well that was stupidly sad...

[KillaTequilla83]

The communal altar in our town was closed too. Apparently some people care more about incessant visions of dying animals surrounded by waves of blood and their cries of agony keeping them up in their dream than in banishing banshees :(

[MckyMseNTarotCrds]

@KillaTequilla83 Um....never mind.

[LunarEclipse135]

I agree. We need to slaughter more goats and bathe in the blood of our cattle to ensure our harvest doesn't fail.

[gigas94]

@LunarEclipse135 omg so true! so sad less people are practicing these rituals.

[fighter1sun]

Yes!!! Duncan think about our WELLS!!!!

[cyanmanta]

Ah, the Christ-in-Christmas bandits are at it again. The people who bark the loudest about "the reason for the season" don't even realize that they're wrong. Christmas was around long before the Christians came along; it just went by different names under the Romans and such. For example, the giving of gifts and preparing of feasts are traditions much older than Jesus; both derive from the Roman festival of Saturnalia, which predated the alleged birth of Christ by more than two centuries.

[EltonvonCthulhu]

@cyanmanta Certain Christmas traditions may have preceded Christ, but Christmas itself did not. There's nothing wrong with keeping Jesus in mind during Christmas.

[cyanmanta]

@EltonvonCthulhu I didn't say there was anything wrong with it. But does that excuse all the "there's a war on Christmas" whining where Christians tell non-Christians that Jesus is the only reason for the season? Every year, it seems there are a few of them who think we're dragging "their" holiday down as if it belongs to them and only them. I will celebrate Christmas any way I like, and no Christian is going to tell me how I may or may not do so.

[IBringsTheRuckus]

i think this is clifford baines' best excuse yet

[ayparillo]

@IBringsTheRuckus

I'm just glad he survived the clocktower battle with his rival.

[Gnostic2030]

FUCKERS ITS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH DEMONS AT ALL

[MrThahey]

think about our whales!

[kingzflames]

Whenever commercials come on tv I just watch these instead.

[AnnihalationonaStick]

I'm sorry Duncan, but frightnin' away the demons is the reason for the season.

[Angelblade717]

"Think about the whales!" haha, that lady is a great actor!

[TimeKaiser]

We should come up with an anti-commercialism holiday and make it so popular that some stupid company tries to commercialize it.

[leldoryn]

@TimeKaiser There's actually Buy Nothing Day. Lulz.

[TimeKaiser]

@leldoryn Now all we need is for one or more stupid companies to actually try to commercialize that anti-commercialism holiday. XD

[shibukisama]

lolwut?

[elkor101]

americans are so stupid.... how can you forget about the evil monsters coming to kill you once a year

(this is a joke BTW)

[DannyJProductions]

"GET OUT YOUR AMULETS!"

[emospadez]

i wish holloween was like how they describe it ): it'll be so much fun

[danxl5]

They should have blood orgies.

[fpattenable]

Duncan is always going against the grain.

[GreeceOTOT]

I really want to celebrate Halloween with this guys.

[bmgiannotti]

hehe merry christmas

[Mikanismable]

Duncan Birch, author of "Hallowhy?" I AM SCREAMING.

[afsana7990]

uuh I really need to find somebody who clicks with me

[neoYTPism]

I swear, this is a perfect metaphor for the "Jesus is the reason for the season" perspective about Christmas. It was clearly considered acceptable for Halloween to stray from its roots, why is it so condemned when it comes to Christmas?

[TheRainSnake]

@neoYTPism its meant to be a metaphor for christmas, though its not really the same. i mean i dont think people are saying "celebrate christmas wrong and you'll go to hell". okay, maybe some people are, but i think the majority of people who say that christmas is straying from its roots just want the "christ" back in christmas. when you take a holiday about the birth of the "lord and savior" and make it about a fat man who exchanges gifts for cookies, it can offend people.

[neoYTPism]

Yes, and I'm sure pagans might feel offended that their religious beliefs are looked down on @TheRainSnake

Really, though, it does seem that most Christians tend not to care when people offend the religious beliefs of less popular religions. Isn't it only fair, then, that most Christians end up offended themselves?

[TheRainSnake]

@neoYTPism are you referring to "an eye for an eye"? sorry, just musing. i wasnt referring to religious jokes or disgraces from other religions and cultures, but to the inward decline of the religious structure. christianity is widely celebrated, but the real message of the religion is usually lost. christmas is taking the idea of giving and "giving" it a new environment it wasnt meant to be in. i think thats the real reason people become angry with the idea of commercialism.

[neoYTPism]

If that's the case, their opposition should be to commercialism in general, rather than just focusing on the commercialization of specific holidays @TheRainSnake

[TheRainSnake]

@neoYTPism well whatever. it doesnt really matter much and we cant do that much about it

[neoYTPism]

You including commercialization of Christmas in the "can't do that much about it" comment? @TheRainSnake

[TheRainSnake]

@neoYTPism "we cant do much about what other people think" is what i meant

[thecapone45]

lmao!!! 42% of americans cant locate earth on globe! lololol

[dranion15]

is it wrong for me to want to punch all of them in the face?

[therandomstuffacount]

Study shows that 42% of Americans still cannot locate earth on a globe. Hahaha

[sanikadisanyaka]

My name is Mike from LA Although there busizz4me.info

[chiffmonkey]

Clifford Banes could not be with us today Feb 30th, because he was working out root -1, cooking the cake in portal, discovering the aether, being the stig, reclaiming pluto as a planet, getting robbed by the one armed bandit, and remembering that there is no spoon anyway, so didn't bother showing up.

[AutobotLover]

think about our whales

[indigothecat]

I only got a few seconds in, and I knew this was going to go downhill once she said, "The TRUE meaning of Halloween!"

Is she aware that Samhain came before Halloween on the same exact day, and is Wiccan in origin?

[AndyDrewww]

@indigothecat how dare slapstick parody not be 100% historically accurate...

[BirrelSquoy]

@AndyDrewww

Iceewotudidthar.

[froggymicwop]

@indigothecat are YOU aware that wiccans stole samhain from the druids? of course not. wiccans don't care about facts.

[AdamYJ]

@indigothecat Actually, it's ancient Celtic in origin. It was a druidic festival that celebrated the harvest and the Celtic new year. It was also supposedly day when the barrier between the world of the living and the world of the dead was at it's thinnest, allowing spirits to come to our world.

[elk832]

Oh God, lol. I love when these have epic endings.

[LaZix7]

Why are they singing the Hop Tu Naa song in Manx?

[MDisindahouse2]

lmao this is still my favorite onion video

[sw204me]

Pretty sure the closing remark is actually a true statistic..

[iconindy]

@sw204me Haha. Get it. Americans are dumb.

Oh wait...

[mattrc2]

@sw204me psh, i don't know what you are talking about. America's that island all by itself isn't it?

[TheDeadDudeWalking]

"EVERYBODY!!! GET OUT YOUR AMULETS!!!"

[CityzenJane]

Briliant.

[sr038]

Why is it that "anger" is the only emotion the spirits are comfortable expressing, maybe the spirits need to mature a bit.....or maybe we are just assuming they're always angry because of our own fear of them, maybe they do have access to all their emotions and don't need any kind of therapy, maybe we need to mature a bit ourselves.

[jiggidyjones]

@sr038 I'd rather have it be anger they express than other emotions... like sexual arousal.

And I seriously hope you are being sarcastic. Not believing in their existence would be the mature thing to do...

[sr038]

@jiggidyjones I have been told that (even in person) I have a very dry sense of humor, I do hate that sarcasm doesn't come through while typing, and now I'm killing the joke by explaining it...

[jiggidyjones]

@sr038 yeah I hate that too. Now that I look back on it, it was pretty obvious you were joking. Sorry for the heckling.

[EclipseTheDarkOne]

I'll stick with, Ghosts/Demons/Spirits do not excist. Halloween is a day too watch Horrormovies while being dressed up with your friends. Call me Overcommeralized but im enjoying it my own way.

[Usuxdyx]

1:04 Bitch wants more candy

[pcoristi]

This is hilarious!!

[WorseThanFriday]

does someone fart after 2:00 ????? just b4 he says absolutely

[GreeceOTOT]

Now i know what i'm doing this halloween

[beaglegirl345]

Duncan is a Halloween atheist

[theman9126]

....pwnd.....

[domandape]

Funny how they claim to be professionals but i had my amulet out way before any of them did. FAIL!

[splattyfish]

lol

[Sketch105]

82 people believe we should continue trick or treating rather than torture animals to protect ourselves from the souls of the dead.

[dillonator42]

Everybody- GET OUT YOUR AMULETS!

[KillingFratellisLeon]

Is this real?

[figaz555]

@KillingFratellisLeon

It couldn't be not real.

[KillingFratellisLeon]

@figaz555 It all makes so much sense now.

[AndyDrewww]

lol, that got out of hand fast.

I wonder if anyone thought this was real?

[MarcowaR]

@AndyDrewww It was real, seen in all over the tv. some dudes soul got taken by a ghoul. glad i managed to find the footage....

:P

[meesasquall]

holy crap! 14%

[A135S4656]

I had to do a science project, with a video of a news report... of me of coarse, and I used the same end credits in my video, Study finds 42% of Americans unable to locate Earth on globe... it's very believable.

[napischu]

I wonder how many americans there were who did mistaken this for a real debate.

[masik7290]

@napischu i wonder how many swedish douchebags write stupid comments on youtube?

[oOBNOo]

@masik7290 I wonder how many people put a question mark at the end of something that isn't a question.

[masik7290]

@oOBNOo I WONDER HOW MANY PEOPLE QUESTION PEOPLE THAT DONT PUT A QUESTION MARK AFTER A QUESTION? LOL

[Nick4563880]

@RONIDC1979 no it's not, it's an old Mexican tradition where they warren costumes to scare away evil spirits and go visit dead family family members in the cemetery

[broli1111]

@Nick4563880 The other guy's right, "All Hallows eve" is the pagan holliday that became halloween. You're thinking of "day of the dead", they both occur around the end of October tho.

[SPONGEBOBFTW123]

lol the globe is the earth

[RONIDC1979]

i know it is funny but it is also factual . halloween is aday to conjure demons sacrifice children slaughter animals and just a very inportant day fo occult magic

[XDarkAppleX]

Lmao at the end " studies show that 42% of Americans can't locate earth on the globe" haha thats just sad

[InsanePickle007]

FUCK HURTING ANIMALS! I'll skin that fat bitch , her skin can cover about... 3 people :3

[ewthmatth]

Duncan Birch, author of "Hallowhy?" LOL

[mackenzieeful]

this is the best one ever!!

[ffffman]

Ahh I miss the old days of halloween.

[scottg4520]

I think the movie, Drag me to Hell took an example from this skit.

[TitWarlord]

i like the woman who looks like rosie o'donald lol

[ErinD7292]

I HOPE YOU ALL KNOW THAT THIS IS A JOKE... FOR FUTURE PEOPLE WHO DONT GET IT HAHAHAH!

[Thepocalypse]

It's like half of all Americans that can't find North America on a globe, so the last fact wouldn't surprise me.

[gio11911]

THINK ABOUT OUR WELLS!

[VitaNuovaRevolution]

Oh. I always wondered why my mom glued that amulet into my hair.......Now I have to thank her

[MDisindahouse2]

that is so sad...

[AliceWithFriends]

And then they all burst out singing.

Epic. Fucking. Win.

[Eurrsk]

Crap! I forgot my amulet! 0_o

[SanguineBullet667]

Santa > Jesus

[argozempo]

Who the hell cares about Halloween and whether or not it's overcommercialized? What about Undercooked Chicken Appreciation Day?

[scotland282]

Think about the whales

[xeractus]

I'd hate to get serious on an ONN video, but Americans really dont know how Halloween came about. In fact, I'm English and I've no idea either.

[Freshhhhh1982]

@xeractus Its a celtic festival.

[LocoRedKixx]

@Freshhhhh1982 100% RIGHT.

[VitaNuovaRevolution]

@xeractus The Irish believed that the veil between the realm of the living and Elsewhere would be the thinnest at the winter's solstice. They'd do things to scare away evil spirits (Jack O'Lanterns), but there were good spirits too, and often they would visit the graves of loved ones and go to mediums to communicate with those passed. When English settlers found that Christianity wasn't catching as well as they hoped, they created a holiday on that day to revere Saints, All Hallow's Eve.It mixed

[TlGBC]

waw eez dis rl?

[TheTrooperX0]

if your kids can't recognize the gaul you talked about @1:17... try telling them? they're not gonna be taught about it in school. idiots.

[ultrabizzle]

@TheTrooperX0 hehe, I hope you're not serious >_>

[123121s1]

Honestly, Duncan kinda had it coming. :s

[CrimsonToast]

Holy Fucksickles!!! This is the craziest onion vid i've ever seen.

[smellydee]

hahaha by far the best video from the onion :D

xxx

[Peeze16]

lol has anyone even ever seen clifford baines?

[Smackerlacker1]

What is happening to this country, when we no longer give our archaic superstitions the reverence that they deserve? Like Christmas. We no longer celebrate the death of Horus, our Lord and Savior. I mean c'mon! He was born of a virgin, died for our sins and was resurrected three days later!

And why don't we offer burnt sacrifices on the solstices and equinoxes anymore? If we don't give these gods and spirits the respect that they deserve one day a year, they will destroy us!

[Mistoffelees11]

jack skellington is mmmuch more than a fictional character!

[flamesabrethedark]

"Everybody, get out your amulets!!!" best line ever

[joey3491]

The onion is the best.

[fegu]

I'm not afraid to say to people everywhere "HAPPY HALLOWEEN!" on Halloween. I say it, I don't shy away from that, I say it loud and proud. Are we going to stop saying "Happy Halloween!" now? Is that next?!