Added: 2 years ago
From: alkistisTV
Views: 2,312
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  • you can know someone better then yourself, the deeper you see this person,especially if they have been with you for a long time, you can see the deep human emptiness in them, that is the problem , what we all are at this deeper level.

  • I too have found the 'familiaity breeds contempt' adage to be true. Not just in close relationships, but in friends too. Maybe it's just a human reaction to too much closeness. We're created as single units, so I guess we all need a little more space than maybe society says we need. Society encourages crowding and is suspicious of solitude. Thanks for the thoughts and ideas. Very refreshing.

  • Hi Alkistis:

    I didn't understand your statement that said that: if you get too close to a person, they would tend to take you for granted?

    So how close would "too close" be? I thought the main goal in getting in a relationship was to know and get along with the other person.

  • Off course Alkistis is the expert, but, I think she means like in the Sting song when he says : "if you love somebody set them free", meaning true love is courageous and not insecure.

  • I always like to think of it like guitar strings (since I am a string player). If they are too close, they can't resonate. If they a e too far apart it distorts the sound. The tension and balance are the elements that make the beautiful music.

    Blessings++

  • I totally agree with this video. Thanks, Alkistis.

  • great advice, and thank you so much for the video !....; )

  • So true! As humans we tend to get "dependent" on the other other person as well, so we start feeling hemmed in. Then the relationship starts to unravel quickly. I take trips away from my partner, and he does too. If I can't trust him in another country, then why should I trust him in my bed? I always tell him to, "Have a great, safe time!" He appreciates that totally! Plus, I'm encouraging him to grow as a person. When he gets back or vise versa, we miss each other, and we have stories to tell

  • Again Heraclitus of Ephesus agrees with Alkistis when he says:

    Μεταβάλλον ἀναπαύεται.

    In change is rest.

    Meaning that a healthy relationship needs an environment of change to thrive.

  • Great advice, space also allows a person to develop the qualities that first attracted their partner. Therefore the dynamic of the relationship can continue to evolve. What is more we should actively encourage this healthy room for development as it stops the relationship becoming maladaptive where one person becomes overly reliant on the other, creating a situation which may be unhealthy. If a partner want's to leave you, so what ! I would rather have no relationship than a fake one!

  • An ancient Greek philosopher, Heraclitus of Ephesus said something that might apply to relationships as well:

    Τὰ ψυχρὰ θέρεται, θερμὸν ψύχεται, ὑγρὸν αὐαίνεται, καρφαλέον νοτίζεται.

    Cold becomes warm, and warm, cold; wet becomes dry, and dry, wet.

  • I know how these people feel. Sometimes I get too caught up with my friends that their negative traits become magnified and it can stress me out. But after I take a break from them and start socializing with a different group of people for a short time I return to the relationship with a fresh perspective and generally more tolerant. It doesn't physically change anything, it's just like getting rid of waste that builds up over time. It's very good advice. :)

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