you HAVE CANCER!

[JM0Films]

I can totally see you being an anchor to Weekend Update on SNL, you're really funny!

[Zoopyjoe]

Wanking gives you cancer

[WeHateJonas]

4:58

I paused right here, came back, and it looked like he was ready to kiss wide eyed~

[denverdude02]

apple fucking sucks

[himANDhisUKE]

A"All you anti-hypers.." I think you mean hipsters, Phil. (:

[kmhouston9]

hello

[verytotallyreally]

i JUST klicked that video because of the thumbnail!! xD

[connormaczee]

what doesnt kill you will give you cancer

[ifeelrelaxed]

O M G I can't wait for Terminator 4 :D

[FunnyTrevor]

@ifeelrelaxed Dude, that came out about 2 years ago.

[ifeelrelaxed]

@FunnyTrevor looking back i am not sure if i was being serious or kidding.

[Misayification]

I always wonder...how can you know what gives you cancer without knowing the actual cause of cancer........

[MrTorch333]

Did,ent they used too shoot people that feel asleep at there post???

[ruzzzler]

wait howd he manage to get a mentally challenged guy to play the role of a retarded cop anyway?

[senorgrande1984]

retarded policeman should just be called policeman seeing as all police are retards

[sheepie1q2w3e]

im fro the fufture of 2010 and guess what when batman the dark knight comes out its really bad!

[06tjsr]

Phil!! Ur sxe!! :-D Ahaa I love all ur vids n think ur spot on with ur view on everything!! :-) Fkin super funny!! xD

[Seshhi]

Of course you would think someone bad mouthing Obama would be the douche bag of the day. Sigh, I'm disappointed in you Phill.

[biscuitsNzombies]

um, what doesn't give you cancer these days?

[DrunkenGuyOncrack]

If we planted the right charges, we could blow up the world with about a fourth of the nukes we have.

[sawyerscott52]

Chemotherapy gives you cancer. Oh, the irony.

[CAZekany]

So umm, Im just gonna go ahead and say it...

ZOMBIE CANCER!!!

[AmusingYeti]

Terminator Salvation = Worst film in human, cat, ant, penguin history. Christian Bale completely destroyed it being the arrogant dick face he is.

[TheMakeupExpress]

1. 50 Cent... "Overpaid bullet blocker"...you pretty much summed it up Phil

2. Apple is amazing!

3.I love that movie to be honest with you.

4. "Eat a knife" HAHA I love the Batman movie

5. Everything causes cancer. Anything can cause a mutation in the body. So let me tell you. Don't eat, drink, talk, breathe, or wear clothes. You should be cancer-free but you will be dead.

6. Follow me on my blog at quest4onye.wordpress.c o m

[CheeseGenius]

I remember when BatMan was gay

[alienluvrs]

and somting with penguins

[SCproductions12]

I was looking next to the video and i was like wtf it's an add of 50 cent

[lucaria44]

OOOOK i believe everytime i watch these videos i feel someone accually understands me

[XpEAnUTBuTtERsUckSX]

it actually does because everything is carcinogenic in some way

[hiroto858]

daaaaaang

they made the trailer more epic than the movie actually was

dont get me wrong though i liked the movie. it was alright :D

[DizzyDior12]

You are the opposite of tool. Your videos = legit.

[chaz3681]

I dont know if you know this.....but your a tool.

[alexpaulslikewassup]

Your Mother Has Cancer

[Shadowrunner20009]

everything gives people cancer

[sharma19143]

ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL­LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL­LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL­LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL­LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL­LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL­LLLLLLLLLLLLLMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO­OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, "Just.. eat a knife!"

[owenroe1]

What a Spa

[sharkzilla408]

hahaha banana

[D4hk1LL4H]

Lol he's so true. Like his jokes

[SanSuMartialArts]

cop = cool phill = douche bag !! i said good day sure .......goooood day!!

[Outlaw4life123]

HE IS FROM KENYA DIP SHIT LMFAO

[AliasA]

cooking food gives you cancer.

[rosydonut]

OVERCOOKING FOOD GIVES YOU CANCER!

[daninja13]

so does breathing in a rhythm of crazy train

[theoneusawyesterday]

Man, i love your videos :]

[preppylama99]

you are hilarious hahA xd when me and my boyfriend alex are n the phone, we look up your videos and watch them over and over again and agreeee, and also laugh our heads off, keep up the good work :] ha -sarah

[GSCninja]

Living gives you cancer!

Building legos gives you cancer!

Wearing a bandana gives you cancer!

Collecting bottlecaps gives you cancer!

[XxD1EAN0TH3RD4YxX]

Existing gives you cancer!

Touching anything gives you cancer!

Water gives you cancer!

Is there anything which doesn't give you cancer?

[Hunteress90]

sex? and phil? maybe?

[XxD1EAN0TH3RD4YxX]

@Hunteress90 - sex could give you cancer too >.> I saw an article on it. As for phil, watching him too much on YT will give you eye cancer =D

[gangstergirl554]

@GSCninja

OMG I LUVZ LEGO!

[lp21046]

@GSCninja that means i have cancer because of all the caps i have......lol oh shit

[bionicbunny3000]

@GSCninja hell ya

[sprklshine5]

@GSCninja :D yay me, i dont do any of those 4

[XBOXmetalhead45]

haha the outro

[OzoneReviews]

What ever happened to this awesome intro?

[Smittie69]

is the retarded cop on the secret life show?

[XanderPrime]

ha ha The Retarded Policeman is awesome

[Zoozoorck]

the guy at the beginning looks exactly like a special child who help at my church o.O

[sexcSAbabe4776]

Everything gives u cancer. over it. Its not like you get out of life alive anyway, so who really gives a shit. Stop worrying, do ur thing and have fun. Then you die. end of story

[bullethead2202]

now everything cause cancer

"scientists now believe that bunnies cause cancer"

"studies show that eating too much mayo will give you lung cancer"

[noobtard07]

Im just remembering this now. I saw T4 and it was pretty much a Michael Bay movie. But, wasn't John Connor blond in T2?

[adam91094]

age would turn his hair more brown but he did have a lil blond

[delitez1337]

thats right but did you know that 50sent is not the guy we cal 50sent the really 50 hi was a murder and a raper

[RKftw68]

This is john conor... and youve just been jond in...

[WhoracleVision]

hahaha funny intro... the downey cop cracked me up

[weeklyrs]

Cell phones/cordless phones can give u cancer

[bucketofnothing]

Life gives you cancer.

[MrMajorzip]

jade goody got cancer.

then she died.

happy days......happy days.

[dhemlock]

Best.Intro.Ever,

[FromOuttaNowhere]

Did you travel from 1995? Who the hell even has a pager?!

[kindom2010]

I love Philip hahaha

[Chris1479]

What an annoying cunt. His face just makes me want to slap him.

[Emoskins23]

Then dont watch him ? Simple solution dude.

[erintahdahhhh]

Meow meow meow.

[zannythegreek]

"stop your yapping" - take your own advice you prick

[Emoskins23]

Its a news show .. . . . . .kinda involves talking ?

[S1ckntwist3d]

His Stories Are In The Description Box, Stupid Ass.

[newgarda]

u should posts links to your stories cause they are intersting but r they true.

[metalguitaristpunk]

some sort of withcraft with northern lights and eskimos and polar bears and penguins! LMAO

[rarewhisper]

viewer 444,444 is me :P

[Browneye1035]

I saw the new terminator movie and it kicked ass

[whydizz]

ha ha ha ha awesome intro!!! ha ha bananna!!!

[uncdude12]

peguins FTW!

[sourmanofcoal]

how ta fuck did he train a retard?

[1ockedand1oaded]

who still uses phones?

[DarKnight1fanz]

Eat a Knife HAHAHA!

[ToBeFree16]

hey that guy is on the secret life of the american teenager right? hmmm...

[1ockedand1oaded]

wait 50 cent owns vitamin water? wow lol the only time i got close to one was in the airport (just got home) and after closly looking at all the magical colours, thought "f**k it!" and bought a can of relentless.

[jamalteikore]

he doesnt OWN vitamin water. he invented a flavor and got a lot of money. he doesnt deserve it though because it's just grape flavored and called "Formula 50"

[Pimpbot1000]

eh tim burtons batman was far superior

[bloodsexbooze13]

i dont like christian bale....as a person or an actor...hes just irritating. i cant stand watching him.

[1scarfaceMC]

fuck 50 cent hes a lil bitch thats why he cryed when latin kings came up to him jajaja

[Splaterson92]

what doesnt give you cancer these days -.-'

[NoPrideProductns]

@Splaterson92 Not having cancer...

[Splaterson92]

@NoPrideProductns lol invalid argument

[NoPrideProductns]

@Splaterson92 Prove me wrong...Haha!  Yeah...that just happened...lol

[VKatze]

EAT A KNIFE X'D!!!! Hahaha

[Bayleasaur]

Did that movie even come out?

[5dragons2]

x__X yes that movie came out...it's been out awhile now

[Leeebles]

I've done extensive research for a college course, in the past, and there are many documented cases that MAY support the plausibility of a link between electromagnetic waves and the development of carcinogens within brain tissue. It's believed that some are more susceptible to the risk than others, and other important variables need to be accounted for, but it IS possible, biologically.

So, check it out, if you're interested. Wiki EMR, for some quick info.

[ElleBellesx]

Batman was way too long, I couldnt feel my legs for like the entire last day

[3dakainsane]

i love the do the joker trick on my self lol wheres my pencil

[MEAXpLiciT]

I love the way you said you were pumped for "Terminator Salvation" and the movie SUCKED!

[bangxlx413]

50 Cent's a bullet blocker lmao

[IEatGlu]

Its a shame the terminator really sucked. I was SO hyped for i skipped out on a party to go see the premiere at midnight... then left wishing i could get my 10 dollars and 2 and a half hours of actually fun things back.

[EljiahR]

I love how rappers like 50 oh i dont have a cent sign:( and Kanye West make a fit out of everything

[spikedieslol]

The movie was not that good. Only Heath and the guy playing two face where perfect. other than that Bale Is the worst batman.

[bobandthepigskin]

My favorite retarded policeman episode...

[corndogsx4xbreakfast]

just saying...when the dark knight movie came out, my boyfriend and i went to see it on the 21st then i went to the hospital the next day for mental insanity reasons...or some other reason i can't explain.

[Spiritan3mz]

also, i love the dramatic music they play.

[Spiritan3mz]

in the words of the joker.

WHY SO SERIOUS?

[MyRangeOwnsYou]

shut the fuck up faggot.

[Spiritan3mz]

are you talking to me?

[sugarspyce9]

Terminator ROCKS!

But yea, christian bale kinda sucks.

[The445117]

It's funny how the ad beside the video is foe blackberry CELLPHONES! Very ironic.

[russiapwnage]

i saw terminator in the movies, it was awesome!!!!! if you havnt seen it in the movies definetly rent it, im gonna rent it and watch it 20 times till i get sick of it....

awesome movie!

[xXasianmistressXx]

Lmfao. You make EVERYTHING sound interesting lol.

[chocomilkfan]

I agree. 50 cent needs to get over it and i am a fan of him. it would be funny if he did change his name though. 4 mil. he already has enough

[laurendeadly]

there's probably a chronic case of narcolepsy going around or something ..

[wv4life29]

what is our world comming to?!?!

[debilLT]

bhahaha xDD bananna pager xD

[JohnLennon9209]

then why did you watch it

[AbsintheMint]

FAIL spelling.

At least Phil knows how to write and talk. Just wondering, do you see a bit of yourself in the beginning of the clip? -_-

[aKaBabyJesus]

Lol...

[Simon16180339]

Signals (electromagnetic radiation from your cell phone to the local tower - which is never seems to be nearby) is suspected of degrading the reverse transcription of RNA to DNA. The degradation in turn leads to improperly directed cell replication. If you don't know what any of that means, then keep using your cell phone without an ear jack; oh and start smoking too - because you don't know how carcinogens work either. Not intended as criticism, Phil I'm a big fan!

[TheJugglinJuggla]

The rate at which cell replication slows is so low, it wouldn't have any real impact upon your anatomy.

[CobrazVeNoMx]

Takes 240 hours of air time, proven by doctors

[zachsrader]

Phil is fuckin boss! ... your funny as all get out i just watched legit like 10 videos in a row at least. I love how people actually take time to bash you. and man that 17 year old kid in your other vid is a tart. im 18 and 13 year olds have more common sense its called .... ask someone who works at the park to help you.... phahaha keep up the good work man

[emilihone]

OMG i have that monkey picture on a t-shirt :O

[eskila86]

talk slower lolo

[redyoshi1985]

If you put your cellphone in your front Pocket can it cause Nut Cancer Phil?

[1gn1gh7]

Ignorant humans. Keep fretting, your time is almost up.

This is nothing even remotely close to LIFE.

[TheGeek1028]

Shut up. Just...shut up.

[Blythe31]

AHAHAHAH Banana pager.

[crazyCyrus111]

hello kitty iphone 4tw i wanna get one but i have no money

[BrendanPanda]

first

[minit08]

so true

[MadayTwentySeven]

banana pager ftw

[Ears14U]

This guy is a total loser. Bad taste in a topic too.

[BrentAudi]

Your personality and voice is obnoxious!

Gastly! I promise.

[victorino1pv]

your voice hurt my ears

[lavender40]

YOu should keep doing the Channel " Hooking Up "

[ThatRunescaper]

Yay! Retarted policeman

[sm0kingJay]

rofl @ pager

[Abez111]

hey phil go fuck yourself

[2007jeepliberty]

One word...OUTCAST!!! I'm through.

[ktluvaxx]

OVERPAID BULLET BLOCKER XD

ahh, i continue to fall even more in love with you with each video :]

[TomasPaalman]

"Overpayed Bulletblocker needs to shut the fuck up!" Haha, that was awsome xD

[MaNdYrOsE3]

i'm gonna watch the new terminator movie this weekend..

for free!!!

YAY for military bases!!!!!!..lmao

[yogerts]

shut up noob

50 cent rocks

[Creezymunky]

Ledgend..

[Katriania]

Hello Kitty iPhone, Eskimos, penguins, "Oh no I've had a cell phone, since like, cell phones were INVENTED!" LMAO! XD

[mzdeathkizz]

LMFAO

> "Fuck ya'll. I'm gonna go and do some gangster shit and sue you in the court of law. YO"

>"Now I'm just one guy, but I don't remember when 50 cent HAD a good name or a good song for that matter."

>"...But when I think '50 cent' the only think I think of is: ok, the guy that made millions off of vitamin water, candy shop, Kanye West's bitch. All I'm really saying about this story is that this over-paid, bullet-blocker needs to shut the fuck up. Honestly, honestly...."

LMAO.

[amymaybe11]

lol u just typed the whole script... lol

[slstorm2]

the new batman movie was the best movie EVER!!!!

[XRyokuX]

How can you have a terminator without Arnold? =(

[BerlinCityRunner]

Saw the monkey in the back with headset xDDD!!!

[Matt54956]

LMFAO and it goes Meow meow mewo every time someone calls

[MetalMeProductions]

Haha... a banana.

[iLoveu4ll]

thats not very nice to the the man who actually looks like he is retarded(Down Syndrome?).

Unless it was his idea to make a Retarded Policeman. Then thats ok because he loves himself hopefully.

Anyway i like this video... =]

[bigt00128]

he really does have down syndrome. but he likes doing the videos and no one is making him do it.

[Capoyi]

The Hello Kitty iPhone sounds nice :3

[25legoman]

bale was the worst person they could have chosen....

[HickSlayer1]

christian bale is a stud

favorite actor hands down.

[RamRam956]

5:29 lol

[chives123456]

Yay!

[edref2]

lol

i never realised it was u in the retarded policeman