II Kings Cannibals

[LifeIsABigPuzzle]

Did David have both women put to death? That would be what Moses would have done.

[Nomiss9]

Re-reading this story it doesn't sound all that crazy. Well, the women were crazy, but it didn't justify cannibalism, and the king didn't seem to be very rich. :O

Really funny though. :D

[gagnashdiak]

It was such a good interpretation I actually believed the king said that!

I will just in the next couple of days reach this part, and I realised I've mistaken.

Still, as I blog my reading (in written form) I wish to quote you there if you allow me, of course with link to this video.

[HappyApostate]

Ah, the wisdom, morality, and family values of the good book. It never fails to enlighten. You do such a good job of interpretation I wonder if you could sub for some fundie preacher who wanted to take the day off.

It would be quite funny if you convinced one that you were also a preacher and wanted to guest-preach one day. Love to be in the audience then.

[blackprince84]

You know, in some ways, this is one of your best. It simply lays out the imoral insanity and stops. It would be interesting to hear a fundie preacher make a sermon out of this set of verses.

[andytoz]

Excellent ^^ Glad to have subscribed to you

[SuperiorSavior]

At least the king didn't do what she thought he'd do... or did he :p You never know with the Bible :/

[robindesade]

hears*

[robindesade]

hmm odd isn't it that nobody here's of this story.

i onestly find this funny satirical and briliant, but it sure does show the kind of uuhm sickening OLD ancient customs of biblical times

[kalsolarUK]

yes, the bible is a treasure trove of wickedness and crazy stories. Oh well, keeps us entertained I suppose, lol.

[Drekoguk]

And I thought atheists were the baby-eaters.

[kalsolarUK]

lol, thats just a creationist slur - although, if theres ever a chicken shortage...

[Jacnas]

You got us all wrong. We're not like that at all. We eat christian women and rape babies. Eating infants... it's disgusting and barbaric.

[randompalindrome]

You rock.

[ASithTheyCalledEmo]

Brilliant, as ever.

[Paxmax]

hahahha! excellent one kalsolar!

[AzmodanKijur]

Crazy Lady 1: Let us boil and eat our children.

Crazy Lady 2: Great idea **boils son***

Crazy Lady 1: Om nom nom nom.......he is so sweet and impudent.

Crazy Lady 2: I cannot wait to eat yours! (om nom nom nom)

Crazy Lady 1: Oh, there won't be any of that.

Crazy Lady 2: WHAT?! Why not!?

Crazy Lady 1: I'm sterile and I hate children! Muwahahahahaha! **runs off most crazily**

Great one, Kalsolar.

[kalsolarUK]

lol, interesting alternative version!

[hairyreasoner]

A boiled kid EVERY day? Were those people fucking gluttons, or something? Get some "Hamburger Helper" or toss a salad, for christ's sake.

[twelve121]

rofl

[agnosticman77]

If most christians knew half the stories in the OT they would be sick to their stomachs. The OT is loaded with imaginative barbarity that is not seen in most horror movies today.

[kalsolarUK]

The problem is (as we all know) most christians havent read these stories, they just get to read the more acceptable ones directed to them by their pastor.

[joeyoap]

Well she may as well get some use out of the brat before god inflicts some other misery on the poor sod.

[sapperbloggs]

Great story... one I'd never heard before. Well said too, as usual... keep making these, they're great!

[Atheistblindchick]

I know, that book's so full of love, compassion and good deeds.

I'm actually rather happy there's so many gems to choose from, it'll keep you making great vids for a while yet!

5/5 again...

[kalsolarUK]

yep, the bible is indeed a treasure trove of comedy, despite it's sombre and flowery text.

thanks!

[echthroi9]

Your sinister laugh cracked me up, I almost choked on my soda. Good job. :D

[DblOSmith]

Your skin looks incredibly clean and clear. :) Nice lighting.

Do you talk like that around the dinner table and everything? I dunno if that'd be cool or weird. heh.

[BryanAJParry]

He told me that he conducts his entire life as if it were a YT video.

[kalsolarUK]

hey, I told you not to tell anyone! Can't trust anyone on here. lol.

[BryanAJParry]

Goddamn freak.

[kalsolarUK]

True.. but then we all have our crosses to bear...well except jesus of course.

[kalsolarUK]

I wouldn't be invited to many dinners if I did! Unless they just wanted me there for laughs. doh!

[BryanAJParry]

You seem to be implying that presently you are invited to "many" dinners when I know full-well (for it was **revealed** to me) that you've never been invited to dinner in our whole life.

[kalsolarUK]

*sobs* you can be so hurtful at times.

[riversonthemoon]

But what you're missing here is that it's an...er..allegory. For um...not eating babies. The kings of old were truly wise.

[Hooya2]

OMG finally a story I knew before you told it!!

Yeah that one made me laugh myself to death.

[otakursed]

lmao . . . so that's where Swift got his inspiration for his modest proposal^^ KFC, Killarney Fried Children, certainly a step up from boiled, imho.

[blackprince84]

I love this! There's no "gee, you shouldn't eat babies" from the king. Or even, the king saying "Holy &%*&)*, my people are so hard up they're eating babies!" And of course, it ends with the king suggesting the remaining baby be cut in half.

[kalsolarUK]

In fairness - I think there was a bit of a famine going on at the time. Boiling their own children was certainly cheaper than buying an ass's head which at the time cost fourscore pieces of silver. lol.

[Danmill23]

I'm hungry now! );

[laffer35]

Oh my god, I laughed out loud while listening to this one! Haha :D

Awesome :D

[mortemdei]

hahahhahhahahahaahh, excelente como siempre

[windham666]

pop pop popping the bible bubble

[CheezMonsterCrazy]

Mmm... babies are delicious! *rubs hands together as skin turns red and horns sprout from head, and all crosses within a four mile area burst into flame*

[kalsolarUK]

babies are delicious eh? Hmm... well so far I can't find a single cookery book with a recipe for how best to prepare one. Perhaps boil-in-the-bag baby would be an easy option - tv dinners mmmm.

[CousinoMacul]

As an atheist (and you know we atheists eat babies), I completely sympathize with the plight of that woman.

[kalsolarUK]

Maybe that accounts for your healthy looking shiny pate - I regular diet of babies! hehe.

[CousinoMacul]

Indeed! And as a result of my shiny pate I'm now having trouble with children. But as an atheist, God won't send any bears down to help me out with my problem. So alas, I will need to expand my culinary pleasures.

[kalsolarUK]

lmao, come on, you must have a gun around the house somewhere... I'm sure that would take care of the little blighters.

[Solarees]

AMAZING AS ALWAYS!

[lamnaa]

"What do you expect me to do? Hunt down her son?" said the king

"Well other kings are promising people half babies, I thought it would be worth a shot" said the woman

"I knew I should have just told you to eat cake, this is really going to ruin my tea tonight" King exits

[kalsolarUK]

lol, sounds like a worthy alternate version!

[lazymornings]

I bet thats 'tender' meat, some good eating,yummy!!

Yea, sounds like just another work of fiction designed to scare,not for box office cash but for belief, really believers, are you this stupid?oh you are,sorry!

great vid, thank the bible for that disgusting bullshit.Mind it made for a good vid.

You can get the Kuran in English also,I'd be intrested to hear what you think of that!I think I can guess!!;)

I agree with you.

[kalsolarUK]

lol, I think I might just leave the koran for now... I mean, there's living dangerously and then theres just sheer stupidity. lol.

[inteligentdesigner]

You could try the Book of Mormon, that'll be good for a laugh. Or Dianetics.

[kalsolarUK]

lol...the book of mormon is even more self-parodying than the bible.