Top Ten things NOT to say in an Airport

[saaywhaat1]

did i mention LAME by any chance?

[missiwonderwhy]

number 1 thing not to say at an airport: "I'm a terrorist."

[Dawmoon]

This cracked me up :) great lines man

[cmadodge]

Haha... I love satire... but listen up Americans!!! Imagine ACTUALLY using one of these lines! You'd miss your flight. Likely spend minimum 5 hours with ALL SORTS of agencies stopping in to talk to you and ultimately release you OR if you act like a jerk (or are Middle-Eastern) they could hold you for up to 28 days without charging you OR admitting to even having you in custody. By that point they can "claim" you resisted their CONTROL and hold you INDEFINITELY as an "enemy combatant" AMRKAFKYA!

[enamio]

RACIST SHIT!



[DarbyMerce]

This is not cool...at all...u need to go to jail

[3o5Miami]

this shit it corny

[jewpiles]

Step One: Don't be brown (

[Cal2318]

I wonder if he tell all his friends "hey guys its september 10th you know what tomorrow is...Party at my house!".

[StrwbreFldz4evR]

LOL...so right!!

[cammyu00]

lololololol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[DruinFeyfolk]

That was some funny sh*t!!!

[Lally0011]

who in the blue hell r u to critize muslim people. now i'm not a muslim but not all of them belong to the jihad and al qaeda, ur a muthafuckin wank u gay dick in tha pussy ass bitch for even makin this homo ass video u fuckin FOB

[Lally0011]

who in the blue hell r u to critize muslim people. now i'm not a muslim but not all of them belong to the jihad and al qaeda, ur a muthafuckin wank u gay dick in tha pussy ass bitch

[dimepiece1997]

@Lally0011 Thank you for your concern im muslim and trust me this is not insulting because the word Jihad means to struggle like the fact i wear a hijab on a hot 30 degrees summer day is Jihad for me if you understand. Its just that at airports now if you are muslim you will be watched and asked alot of questions or stopped and searched thoroughly. And saying some of these things can cause delay for you at an airport trust me

[RabiehAhmed]

You should be shot.

[Greathoof]

Tenth would be the Hungarian phrase (what people say when they are extremely angry)

"Olyan ideges vagyok majd' felrobbanok"

translated:

"I'm so angry I'm gonna explode"

[achilies12346]

Number 1 Line should be : Hey, IM ARABIAN! BAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

[ACORNSUCKS]

Funny

[lumifie]

this was funny ok fuck you peepz

[djibeauty86]

Stupid

[coolslaya]

hehe

[BrownnnEyes]

OK SHUT UP, this is not RACIST, how can it be racist when the guy is middle-eastern himself?? get a sense of humour, this is funny

[lelejoekane]

LMAO....NICE!

[jacksonshakur]

and if you have a friend named jack don't say hi

[Drbolla345]

*fart* tell the guy next to you "I laid a bomb".

[IntrepidMoocher]

83 people don't have a sense of humour.

[Holmesy278]

silly black cunt

[outstretchedwings]

I don't get the last one

[xthexelitex]

Lool

[xtryingx]

that was very weird.

[SaradominNUB]

if u say allahs name they'll think ur a taliban terrorist

[IstalkBananas]

ROFL!!! To jihad or not to jihad...

[leyshjonoe]

@IstalkBananas shakespearian islam? hmm...

[SuperBored10]

Airport Officer: "Got any fire arms,Sir" You: "What you need"

[ianarmstrong7]

ahmad ahmad, how many time i tell you bomb is not toy!

[DontBroadcstYourself]

Never greet jack!

[XIXownageXIX]

"what are the chances that we will crash" Worst ever thing to say seriously

[RionaOops108]

this is offensive, why wouldn't you be able to say Allahu Akbar in an airport? it means God is the greatest its too bad if you don't understand the langauge. And for those who don't know JIHAD DOESN'T MEAN TO HIGH JACK A PLAIN AND KILL EVERYONE ON IT! JIHAD IS ARABIC FOR RELIGIOUS STRUGGLE! ignorance isn't attractive.

[yazied00100]

lol ! i got on a plane for 14 hours and i didnt say one single word! i was afraid someone will think i am saying some shit in arabic! LOL

[Chechzki]

my mum makes me wear a hoodie when we go to the airport, she's like "I'm not gonna miss a flight just because of your scarf wearing." it's like ohh thanks for the support mom. but i have too or else she'll beat me with her sandals. HA! jkes,

[RionaOops108]

@Chechzki Fear Allah not your mom.

[Chechzki]

@RionaOops108 its a joke

[Oo786oO]

@Chechzki

Hmmm. Sister if you are forced to wear a hejab then the true significent spiritual meaning behind it is lost. Try researching into it so that you can find the love to wear it out of your own free will. Take care

ma'asalam.

[Chechzki]

@Oo786oO wtf k i say one thing and u weirdos turn it around, im not F#Ck*n^ being forced wth when did i say this??? I DIDN"T!!

[Oo786oO]

@Chechzki

Oh. Sorry sis. I misinterpreted the message you typed. My intention was not to twist your words, nor was it to debate; it was just sincere advice. Anywho now it's apparent that you are not in need of the advice. Mention me in your du'as if you remember. Ma'asalam.

[Chechzki]

@Oo786oO haha it's okay man. srry i snapped at ya. It just happens alot and I took it out on you. soo srry. as long as that wasn't your intention . I will insha'Allah. Ma'asalam

[Oo786oO]

@Chechzki

No problem! It happens... Take care. Ma'asalam.

[Chechzki]

@Oo786oO how can you twist my words if your a true muslim. this isn't a debate, it was joke, learn what humour is.

[joseph88897]

hees a paki nd he dont say nuffin at an airport just in case

[TheSupporter91]

haha f**** funny xDD

[saxondale321]

FUNNY FUNNY FUNNY!

[riK987]

Im a Sikh and wear a turban. When i was studying aboard, and traveling 2 different countries on da weekends i would always get "randomly" searched. 1 time after i was finished being searched 1 of my friends came up 2 me and said, "so. . . did they find it?" with a serious face, and then the security lady sat me down again and searched all of my carry-on luggage

[BrownnnEyes]

@riK987 looooooooooooooooool

[kajoj21]

to jihad or not to jihad lolz

[Zvesda]

I thought number one is:

...bomb...

[sergeantyeti]

Great job Froosh!

[tokcu4eh]

HILARIOUS!

[dragon6855]

what exactly s wrong with :ALLAH AKBAR

?

[LowLowSpinners]

imma try that 1

[TheGooberment]

the first thing is that you should never talk with middle eastern accent

[heterohighelf]

you forgot: DURKA DURKA MOHAMMED JIHAD!!!

[unknownxyz37]

some of it i didn't get it or couldn't understand cuz of his accent. All i heard was bomb, ticking,how many air marshals?, send my luggage to Washington D.C and i can take over the plane if the pilot gets tired.

[Deanchester16]

lllllaaaaaaaaammmmmeeeeeeeee

[lizisbearycute]

Hahaha, that was hilarious...

[Blessja]

wow

[C13J9]

man can't u speak normally u fuckin gay....i didn't understand a word !!

[watermelonandpotato]

That's because English is clearly not his first language - it's called an accent X3

[m2mfan4eva]

Isn't it a fake accent? Lol

[DrikoUSA]

try it in spanish and u will be arrested....lol..

[ymagrl]

It was very funny.

[muslimmayhem]

seriously sometimes i don't mind the jokes about Muslims but this one want even funny

get a life m8

[dciguy01]

I thought it was very funny. Get a sense of humor

[ThunderDonkey]

yeah, lame.

[HawK047]

This one was propably by a muslim even.

[muzzammil9]

it's funny.. but it's sad how racist airport officials are towards muslims.. even people who LOOK muslim

[brsRker]

that wasn't funny...

[sbeax619]

thats preety rasict...but also funny =P

[farrsouth]

funny, way to funny

[bmxerbond11]

bomb!

[AnthAhmad]

hahaha funny man Ahmed ahmad how many times i tell u bomb is not toy!!! im lebanese this is some funny shit

[dart981]

LMFAO you have to be able to laugh at yourself.

[UnknownHaxer]

Racist ass moron.

Why don't you go get a bigger penis?

[PatriotsPride12]

your gay. talking about penis

[UnknownHaxer]

'Talking' about penis doesn't make you gay, for fucks sake, why don't you nerds use some common sense.

[PatriotsPride12]

you said the guy dick was little. I'm pretty sure you use that word alot. You're always thinking about...Fag

[UnknownHaxer]

Sure I do.

[gasher70]

i dont find the mojo that good for some reason. thats just me.

[ThePatMoran]

the first one should be BOMB!

[4marchbaby12]

i agree that's what i was thinking when i first clicked the video

[meebs95]

hey that's really funny XD

[residenteviladict]

11th: im pakistani

[Dafroft]

amad amad how many times i tell u bomb is not toy lol

[proudmuslimsister01]

Ummm excuse me i lost my passport but will this Al-Qaeda membership card do haha. I love terros.

Allahu Akbar

Allahu Akbar

Allahu Akbar

[davidwhatadick]

Dirka Dirka Jihad

[evolkram]

that last one was from kite runner ya douche.

[raptormonev]

jihad or not to jihad hahahaha

[lancettes]

looool

[lamborghinithking]

lol

ahmad(my name) is a gangester name

[oywidapoodles]

Planes are the only place I get the overwhelming urge to use the phrase "da bomb."

[bboydjoe]

HAHAHAHAH LMAO DAM THIS WAS FUNNY

[tomken8dy]

"I want a seat directly over a fuel tank."

[polos505]

What in the world are you talking about? really, I did not understand anything.

[T4zY]

me niether!

[jesuistahmid]

the last few were just lame

[Billions719]

u fukin punjab go fuck urself

[TheSweetGirl37562]

Lol..

And to those who did not understand what he said; Get a move on, I'm 14, live in Denmark and english is not my mothers tongue, which you probably already guessed. But he was not very hard to understand. :)

[airsoftkid59]

hey that waz funny really really funny

[andychappers07]

Ahh passive racism.

[aztecprincess87]

lol omg how in tha hell could you not understand what he said???

this is fucking america, how many different nationalities are in this country???

you should be able to understand them all!!!

this vid was pretty funny and haha hell yea at tha person below me, don't greet jack! HIJACK!

lol.

[attackofdameepits]

lol Yeah I have an uncle named jack. Guess I cant say high to him at the airport... xD

[ArararoZamora]

they forgot one...... if you have a friend named jack DONT GREET HIM!!!!, hi-jack

[Symmetriq]

@ArararoZamora Recycle incredibly old jokes much?

[bubaloow123]

trying not to be racist when i write this but...

didnt catch a word of that, atall

[Greathoof]

Yea, almost the same here... I only understood a few word...

[RicoGustav]

lol. well, I hope you're not American or other english speaking countries, cause I'm Asian and english is not my mother tongue and I can understand it most of it.

[santacruz4]

#6 wasnt even a comment, more of a response to a question. this wasn't funny, you gotta push the line more

[patennis3]

what did he say at number 6?

[Lee7noo8]

Racist video.

FAIL.

[Warunho]

Actually no, it seems like it, but it aint

[muslimlander]

lool, reall y funny and so true

[21433H]

Very funny. I saw a link on the internet once that, when clicked on, started to count down from ten in arabic. Ideal for a laptop midflight. Although, i'm guessing that by the time you got out of prison the joke would of worn off a bit.

[Joshgldbrg]

sand negro go go

[818ANDR3S818]

Wtf niggers

[fatimadzan]

Asalamu aleikum.Walla i was laughing brother...very good sence of humor...I was travelling a lot for the last two years a lot and believe me every time they checked my bag and found little pocket Quran i heard silly questions...like What is the purpose by having it in airport? and so on...So the question is Jihad or not jihad.He he

[PranksJust4Fun]

lol, they were probably scared like "OMG ITTS A BIBLE IN ARABIC", lol im muslim and i fly alot my final destination is usually in the middle east so of course you get checked with those random searches

[10dimensionman]

i dont get any of them. =( then again im 12...

[Cottenballz93]

i dont get any of them and ime 15 =/

[areeb10000]

you have to be racist or muslim to....really understand it....me...im muslim lmao

[kimskazmi]

haha lol! gwd reply bro :p

[afghanSara]

hahaha, to jijad, or not to jihad.

[xamarcadeeye]

You are beyond callow .........

your  Foolishness

is just sad to watch......

[moviedisorder]

please dont do that again because thats a wate of time

[tom31385]

Not funny and serious bad taste

[A7XDudeDrums]

get a sense of humour

[paperclip456]

wow!!

thats funny

[Revern]

number 2 and 1 are the funniest hahahaha

my name is muha achmed

[muslimahrevert]

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha­hhahaha

[jeremysc123]

fucking muslim

[James670]

Jack: Hi John!

John: Hi Jack!

[fozterchild]

ahhhh hahahaha...that's fucking brilliant! i'm still laughing!

[skeetshooter410]

Perhaps we should not be making fun of things like this, and instead remembering those that lost their lives on 9/11????

[AceTracer]

We can't do both?

[mellisco]

never go into an airport and say

This place is the BOMB!

[ASmileIsACharity]

hahaha :P

[muslimrani]

lol, funny!

[thegunman55]

Lmao. Great job.

[moroolz]

idiot

[kkooccooww]

dude i got in giant cuz i screamed yer da bomb at the airport lucky me mom works at southwest!!!

[maroutyII]

I'm muslim and this is actually true u'll see the security guard like, FUCK NOT AGAIN....

[KimDonesia]

It's it's "ALLAHU AKBAR", not "Allah Akbar". 'Tard.

[cinnamonrefresh]

you put 'it's' twice, not once like it should be. 'Tard.

[KimDonesia]

And don't you dare take Allah's name and use it as a way to ridicule His name. Man you're ignorant, people like you make Muslims look bad.

[KimDonesia]

Obviously you have education about the true meaning of jihad therefore are ignorant and have no knowledge as to the true meaning of it. Go buy yourself a book.

[puzzledabul]

very funny but true.

[pilot7893]

"How many air marshals on this flight? Two? ****, COME QUICKLY!!

[viewerABCDEF]

dry...

[nadinehanafi]

Pretty funny =)

[Cromanijak40658]

to dzihad or not to dzihad - that is the question....

[collision934]

racist rubbish hes sikh

[mauiwowie11]

how the fuck is that racist

[mrwonderful966]

yeah it is

[prettyhotattractive1]

so funny

[LSUrockshard2]

hilarious great job dude

[AmreenM]

Erm...Ok...

[walshinator250]

i got one....u need two people

one yells: HIjack!

other yells: HI fred

[SuperkoolAidman122]

THATS NOT FUNNY WALSHINATOR250

[mcdetinate]

i thort it was u jackass

[mrblair87]

yes it is funny,

[tubeyou443]

Two guys got kicked off a plane recently for saying that.

[NikiAMFM]

i think the number 9 was funny :)

[darrylqanatsiaq]

lol good one

[marziatokhi]

all i can say....

you are not funny!! m not sayin tht cz m muslim...its jst not funny

[CHOCHANG786]

i agree with andyw77 lolsss u prat (person in the vid) very funny

[asadyasinabbasi]

Soo kool and true !

Great Job!

[austinpowerz007]

hahaha 3

[humagb]

ur not funny

no seriously.. ur not funny!

ur just increasing the ignorant people's ignorance... people who think that all muslims are terrorists!!!

such people are slaves.... slaves of media ... slaves of their news reporters!!

I repeat... thats not funny

by the way... 9/11... was not even done by osama.. he is long dead!

9/11 was a bush conspiracy! Go watch all those documentaries about it... mabe by AMERICAN journalists!!!!