Jews and Sea Creatures - Myq Kaplan

[LilPitt92]

I think myq looks a tiny bit like the guy from mrarturotrejo channel

[myqkaplan]

@LilPitt92 thanks! if that's a nice thing to say. and no thanks, if it's not!

[handymandan100]

Hhahaha! I love how they give him the skinny "Price is Right" mike. Classic. I think this video just made a new fan. My cousin is Jackie Kashian and she's got one of these animated vids, too, about crazy Los Angeles pet people. Someone is doing a great job promoting you guys

[myqkaplan]

@handymandan100 thanks! i think this comment just made me a new fan of your fandom. jackie is super! thanks for saying nice things.

[GingerMafia13]

why are you so freakin hilarious

[myqkaplan]

@GingerMafia13 because people like you think i am? thanks!

[artemisandbandit4ev]

It's was funny though because I looked you up on YouTube to show my oldest brother and the label of your video was 'funny comedian on Conan' and we said as opposed to...?

[artemisandbandit4ev]

It's kinda funny though, well not funny but my friend maddie is a vegan and this kid named Tate is always saying that cows deserve to die and maddie is all noo!!!

[artemisandbandit4ev]

Ya I originally saw you on Conan with my dad and I was all MOM you gotta see this guy lol.

[artemisandbandit4ev]

Where will you be next?

[artemisandbandit4ev]

Where will you be next?

[myqkaplan]

@artemisandbandit4ev i will be at a few shows in the LES of NYC tomorrow, and thursday through saturday i will be in ann arbor, MI.

[artemisandbandit4ev]

Oops, bulldogs. Like AAA and the KKK, those are just two organizations....to my location, as a stranded Jew

[myqkaplan]

@artemisandbandit4ev those are things that i have said, correct!

[artemisandbandit4ev]

You are awesome

[artemisandbandit4ev]

Pls reply!!!!

[myqkaplan]

@artemisandbandit4ev no! i mean, okay.

[artemisandbandit4ev]

I love myq Kaplan!!!!! We both have aquatic saviors everybody!!!!! Nobody ever says I am Jew friendly! Cause nobody is. Ever

[myqkaplan]

@artemisandbandit4ev i love replies on youtube! thanks for writing!

[CheshireCatFun]

Octopus as Jewish Messiah? Cthulu, anyone? (Go Pods!)

[myqkaplan]

@CheshireCatFun good call... i wrote this joke a long time ago, i think my octopus predicted that predicting octopus.

[MakefunNotwar]

mad funny Myq! great animations as well

[myqkaplan]

@MakefunNotwar mad thanks! and glad thanks! from me and greg franklin who did the animations.

[tekbarrier]

Your advice is very helpful. Thank you very much for replying! I wish you the best of success!

[myqkaplan]

@tekbarrier you are welcome. i wish you the second-best of success!

[tekbarrier]

Oops question 3 should say "change up some jokes if they don't get good reactions"

[myqkaplan]

@tekbarrier 2) it's different for everyone. some people don't experience much stage fright, and some people always do. you just have to want to perform more than you don't. i recommend thinking about the worst case scenario and realizing it's not horrible: a room full of people hates you but you never see them again

3) you learn by doing. start doing.

PS bonus answer: look for an interview i did on Reddit (a website) for more in depth answers about some of these things and more

[tekbarrier]

Hi Myq, saw you on comedy central and you are very funny. I had one question no wait two (I hope to be an aspiring stand up comic someday soon) 1. How do you memorize 30-60+ min of material and remember it all when you're performing? 2. How do you overcome nervousness/stage fright? 3 (bonus question). How do you learn to "read" an audience (i.e. change up some jokes if they get good reactions? Sorry for all the Qs but it would be of great help!

[myqkaplan]

@tekbarrier hi tekbarrier, saw you on youtube and you are nice. first, let me say that i think your hopes are within your grasp: you can very soon be an aspiring standup comic. just as soon as you start aspiring, and standing up, whichever you're not doing yet.

answers:

1) you start by doing 5 minutes or less usually, then work your way up slowly, 7, 10, 15, 20, and so forth. and your brain helps with the memorizing.

2) and 3) see other comment

[mossface78562]

Cows playing chess...the silly..if they try they'll eaither break the table or get the chess bored all wet in slobber...I wouldn't touch it ;p

[myqkaplan]

@mossface78562 that's why i forfeited to the cow, i believe. cow wins at chess, human wins at comedy.

[Wartler]

I'm still trying to figure out if that's fake laughter in the background or not.

[myqkaplan]

@Wartler thanks for your interest! i'm sorry it's taken you so long to ask. it is real people laughing, as the audio is taken directly from a CD that was recorded with a live audience laughing for realsies.

[wimpylassiter2336]

CTHULLHU

[myqkaplan]

@wimpylassiter2336 lives on in all of us.

[GraciousVillain]

This guy is so amazing.  The last bit with Jesus had me laughing for, like, five minutes straight. I need to see him perform live.

[myqkaplan]

@GraciousVillain this villain is so gracious. thanks for laughing continuously. hope to see you in an audience live soon.

[fartpoopify]

i LOVE your stand up i just saw the stand up last night

[myqkaplan]

@fartpoopify i LOVE your youtube comment. i just saw the comment yesterday. sincerely, much appreciated!

[TheImmortalTree]

This guy is funny, I've been watching many of his videos, Jesus has been telling me to warn people of his soon coming and I was just thinking about this when he started joking around about it. God confirms things to me in these ways and he is confirming it to you right now. He will use any means to do this. Ask Jesus to forgive your sins and enter your life right now if you are reading this. This is not a joke. Call upon the Lord while he is here. GOD WILL CONFIRM THIS MESSAGE TO YOU AFTER TODAY

[myqkaplan]

@TheImmortalTree thanks for saying i am funny and watching my videos. i appreciate you passing along the message from jesus as well. all the best to you.

[TheImmortalTree]

"Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers (mockers), walking acording to their own lusts, an saying Where is the promise of his coming? for since the fathers died, all things continue as they were from the beginning of the creation. For this they are willingly ignorant...But the heavens and the earth...are kept in store, reserved unto fire against the day of judgment and perdition of ungodly men. But beloved, be not ignorant of this..." 2 Peter 3:3-7

[myqkaplan]

@TheImmortalTree thank you for calling me "beloved." i belove you too.

[TheImmortalTree]

Jesus IS coming back soon ....."God is not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance. But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up." 2Peter3:9-11 THIS IS NOT AN ACCIDENT THAT YOU ARE READING THIS whoever you are reading these words right now. God bless you

[myqkaplan]

@TheImmortalTree thanks for your blessing! i appreciate it.

[bigapple10506]

Myq, you should do this routine at a certain, mostly jewish camp in CT

[myqkaplan]

@bigapple10506 maybe i will. or did. or am. some tense.

[bigapple10506]

@myqkaplan, or are you afraid that this routine might not be permitted by the omnipotent directors?

[myqkaplan]

@bigapple10506 i am afraid of nothing! (meaning i am so afraid, i am even afraid when there is nothing to be afraid of.)

[yooncat]

I saw you in yesterday's comedy central. Which showed a heck of a lot of stand ups and ur the one I remembered XD ur jokes are so funny and smart

[myqkaplan]

@yooncat thanks for seeing it, remembering it, and talking about it here. you're nice.

[Wolfboy8x8]

I emailed a link of this video to PZ a few days before he posted it on his blog so I think I get some of the credit for the recent jump in views of this video! I'm so proud!

[myqkaplan]

@Wolfboy8x8 the credit is yours! enjoy! and thanks!

[zafff13]

myq - i am jewish and i'd like to say to you that after seeing your videos i stopped believing in the god of abraham and now i believe in you only. you are the true god.

barukh myq ha'mevorakh

[myqkaplan]

@zafff13 thank you, my child. i am no god, but i'm happy to be believed in.

[Hostile]

I dunno if The Price Is Right music sounds very Jewish, but I know this bit is AWESOME.

[myqkaplan]

@Hostile i believe the person playing the music believed it to be more conceptually than conventionally jewish. and THANKS!

[Dstorm20xx]

Myq Kaplan = The god of comedy... and jews.

[myqkaplan]

@Dstorm20xx Dstorm = the human of being thanked... by myq

[dannyboy785]

@Dstorm20xx when you say "and jews"... do you mean myq is the god of jews or the jew of comedy?

[TheTlotra]

Waas the octapus that predicted the outcome of the football matches, THE MASSIAH?

[myqkaplan]

@TheTlotra good question. only that octopus knows. but it is dead now. maybe it can answer if it comes back from the dead.

[TheTlotra]

@myqkaplan LOL, yeah.

Random question, but what is your view on wicca?

[myqkaplan]

@TheTlotra non-random answer: i don't know everything about wicca, but i have positive impressions of it. as i understand it, it's a lot about nature and not casting spells and such, though i'd be fine with magic also if it existed which maybe it does. as long as the wicca people aren't hurting anyone (which is my impression), i'm down.

[TheTlotra]

@myqkaplan In a lot of tv shows (well, anime really) i watch, there a good amount of wiccan girls (for some reason, no dudes). they run around in school uniforms wearing witch hats, wearing the elemental seal, and doing cartwheels, chanting, and hunting from fairies to dragons, with their familliars.

Sometimes, they really go a mile to far, referring to the ppl who make those shows.

an alternate example is nagisa. did you ever encounter any religous stereotypes like that? (besides simpsons)?

[TheTlotra]

@myqkaplan i guess.

i am a (budding) comedian myself, btw.

(my jokes focus on things like, well randomness.)

i hope you do not mind me asking but is there any advice you could pass on to a rookie?

[myqkaplan]

@TheTlotra i do not mind your asking. the best (and pretty much only) advice there is is to write as much as possible, get on stage as much as possible, and then keep doing those things. to succeed takes talent, work, and luck in some combination that is different for everyone, and the only thing you can control is the work. so, get to work: hone your talent, put yourself in more positions to have the opportunity to get lucky.

[TheTlotra]

@myqkaplan Thanks for the advice!

My best joke is:

cooking with Zenu,

add the turkey into the volcano, wait a few eons, and then throw your lifes savings into the volcano, and there you go.

[myqkaplan]

@TheTlotra you are welcome. as a vegan though, i don't condone turkey murder.

[NickVatterott]

I like this

[myqkaplan]

@NickVatterott i like that.

[christiandeblis]

myq you're so funny! I like the animation :) dude, come to the irvine improv!!!

[myqkaplan]

@christiandeblis you're so nice. i like your comment on the animation. and i'll try to get to the irvine improv as soon as possible (dude).

[BlackLethalDragon]

awsome and hilarious XD

[myqkaplan]

@BlackLethalDragon thanks and thanks-larious!

[JewishPlan]

i think in germany that would be not funny

[myqkaplan]

@JewishPlan fair enough. good thing almost every country in the world isn't germany then! (all but one, really.)

PS i think it would be funny there too.

PPS thanks for your comment!

[JewishPlan]

@myqkaplan not funny ;-)

[myqkaplan]

@JewishPlan not appreciated. (smile/wink.)

[nicolecollins62]

good video

[myqkaplan]

@nicolecollins62 thanks! good comment.

[JewishPlan]

Jews?

[myqkaplan]

@JewishPlan yes, jews. i think.

[multimackes]

YOU VERY VERY FUNNY

[myqkaplan]

@multimackes thank you very very much.

[interestingperson121]

OMG I laughed my testicles out .... HAHAHAHAHAHA

[myqkaplan]

@interestingperson121 thanks! i hope you get your testicles back in someday. so you can laugh them out again. much appreciated!

[fartmonkey89]

I find it appropriate to say this because it was very visible and this video includes religious content: Sweet Adam's Apple. It looks good on you. Just make sure there are no snakes or hungry ladies around.

[myqkaplan]

@fartmonkey89 thanks! i'll make sure to keep all the ladies fed. with snakes. killing two snakes with one lady.

[myqkaplan]

@ArawnChernobog they're out there, maybe! thanks for not finding them yet!

[manueldr1985]

@dreca102 We all have abs! :P (Some "six packs" just get covered up by the "keg").

[myqkaplan]

@dreca102 sorry your original comment where you pointed out that jesus had abs was deleted. but thanks for saying nice things!

[manueldr1985]

@myqkaplan Sorry if my comment made another fan delete their comment. You rock!

[myqkaplan]

@manueldr1985 it's not you, it's me. also, it's not them, it's me. i hit a wrong button. apologies to everyone who it's not, from the one who it is.

[pilpanii]

you got 5 star hotel in hell : ) see you there

[myqkaplan]

@pilpanii sounds pleasant, thanks!

[interestingperson121]

@pilpanii except... there is no Hell or Heaven in Judaism :D. Even the Haredim don't bother about that. However, they DO believe in resurrection. You might think that Kabbala talks about that... but Kabbalah isn't your average Judaic discussion topic. Even Rabbis don't touch that stuff.

[myqkaplan]

@alanjakobpaulo yes! waterfall as stairmaster! thanks!

[Benjabola]

so you did both the animation and the comedy? impressive.

[myqkaplan]

@Benjabola i did the comedy. greg franklin and a few other folks are the animators. (fully listed in the credits.)

thanks for your impression!

[Benjabola]

@myqkaplan Oops, in this age of wizardry doo I tend to fall unconscious during the credits of most anything. But you and your team should definitely make more of these.

[Budah1214]

Soooo funny! Hahahhaha

[myqkaplan]

@Budah1214 soooo appreciated! thahahahanks!

[ghazikankan]

nice animation. what pgm was it made in?

[myqkaplan]

@ghazikankan thanks! i have no idea! a computer?

[pokey78]

Fantastic!

[myqkaplan]

@pokey78 thank-tastic!

[NatTowsen]

This is literally the only youtube video I have ever seen with no negative comments. FUK y0 tht guyss notfunny ATALL

[myqkaplan]

@NatTowsen and this is the only youtube comment i am responding negatively to. MAYBE!

[OonaCanute]

Vegan, Jewish, hilarious.... *fans self*

[myqkaplan]

@OonaCanute thanks for fanning yourself, very efficient!

[hazmatikus]

that was brilliant.

[myqkaplan]

@hazmatikus that was appreciated!

[JasonBSchmidt]

genius.

[myqkaplan]

@JasonBSchmidt nice!

[ColiseumGaming]

God damn this is funny. Such a smart joke.

[myqkaplan]

@ColiseumGaming god damn i thank you. such a nice comment.

[jeffreypaulbobrick]

Very funny! But Myq is much better looking in real life!

[myqkaplan]

@jeffreypaulbobrick very nice. but jeff is even nicer in real life!

[Glitterqueen09]

Love it Myq~~

Fiona

[myqkaplan]

@Glitterqueen09 love fiona! --it myq

[Mehranathon]

You're so fucking good, Myq. :)

[myqkaplan]

@Mehranathon you're so fucking thanks! emotiocon.

[Harl33nQu1nz3l]

This is AMAZING.

[myqkaplan]

@Harl33nQu1nz3l that is NICE OF YOU.

[smartbunny]

This is sweet!

[myqkaplan]

@smartbunny so is this! thanks!

[atomicpup]

Loved the waterfall.

[myqkaplan]

@atomicpup loved the youtube comment.

[PeaceLoveAnimation]

Waterfall as stair-master. Hahaha great work Greg!

[myqkaplan]

@PeaceLoveAnimation indeed! thanks! on greg's behalf!

[ChefDeora]

Hilarious! So clever! Loved the "eat" part, and the waterfall, and the octopus.

[myqkaplan]

@ChefDeora thanks! so appreciated! loved the part where you loved the "eat" part, and the other parts you loved.

[chipCHIPLEY]

Greg Franklin's the man!!!

[myqkaplan]

@chipCHIPLEY correct!

[samwawawa]

amazing job Myq. phenomenal 

[myqkaplan]

@samwawawa thank you samwawawa. appreciated!

[BobbyLMello]

That was hilarious Myq! Thanks for sharing! I loved the octopus and Jesus' headphones while doing the waterfall stairmaster!

[myqkaplan]

@BobbyLMello thanks bob! i appreciate your love of those things!

[mariaciampa]

Hilarious!

[myqkaplan]

@mariaciampa lovely!

[EricIComicGenius]

Really really good shit, Myq.

[myqkaplan]

@EricIComicGenius really really thankful guy. --myq

[dhirshon]

Awesome. Great stuff, myq

[myqkaplan]

@dhirshon thanks! great stuff yourself.

[starrberri1]

watched it with my daughter....very funny!

[myqkaplan]

@starrberri1 thanks to you and your daughter!

[banjo94040]

waterfall stairmaster is f-ing brilliant

[myqkaplan]

@banjo94040 thanks! you are f-ing nice.

[xxlesslikeitsmathxx]

That pyramid scheme joke was so subtle that I almost missed it. Myq rules!

[myqkaplan]

@xxlesslikeitsmathxx thanks for almost but not missing it! you rule.

[dannyboy785]

damn, I guess this material is from your cd. I might just have to buy it!!

[myqkaplan]

@dannyboy785 damn, i might have to provide it for you if you do that.

[dannyboy785]

@myqkaplan update: I bought the cd. great stuff!

[myqkaplan]

@dannyboy785 update: your update is appreciated!

[ovidio114]

nice :)

[myqkaplan]

@ovidio114 nice yourself!

[LizMiele]

really like it myq!

[myqkaplan]

@LizMiele really thank you liz!

[thehofstetter]

If you don't love Myq Kaplan, the terrorists win.

[myqkaplan]

@thehofstetter and if you are the terrorists, don't listen to this. (these are our secrets.)

thanks steve!

[cincynj85]

ur fantastic myq!

[myqkaplan]

@cincynj85 im appreciative. --myq

[hexix2]

Hooraybies!

[myqkaplan]

@hexix2 thanksies!

[ChrisCoxen]

This is special and desireable. Very cool.

[myqkaplan]

@ChrisCoxen i especially desire to thank you.

[jodishawmusic]

Ha ha this is great

[myqkaplan]

@jodishawmusic thanks thanks! you are great.

[sidewalksiren]

I already own Vegan Mind Meld, and it is awesome!!

[myqkaplan]

@sidewalksiren i already thank you! (if that makes sense.) awesome.

[goingforthegold]

genius