DOUCHE BAGGED

[awesomerandomcollab]

I WANT ONE!!!!!!!!

[thedesertrose99]

'Requescat en Pace!'

[rmherbert1957]

do they have dental?

[kobold565]

The axe thing made me cough just watching it.

Also, how does one hire this fine gentleman? I have some need of his unique brand of assistance.

[imoutofnames1]

Douchebag Assassin. As bender would say "Bless you, sir"

[THExHOUND]

hahahah nickleback sucks...

[An0nym0us53]

@THExHOUND Yep.

[903bloodjinn]

hey you look at me.. what the fuck are you looking at? hahah

[MrCliper222]

sucks



[MrPintop9]

0:10 anyone know what he is looking at?and why he say after that nice tits?

[Chrisromanis1]

@MrPintop9 How fucking retarded are you he was looking at the tits fucking kid...

[MrPintop9]

@Chrisromanis1 am i retarded?you fucking idiot it was a joke 

[Chrisromanis1]

@MrPintop9 ... Cool story kid..... Go back to Cod black cocks....

[MrPintop9]

@Chrisromanis1 i hate cod i play bf3 and probably bigger than faggot

[ChurchRosary77]

Pwnd



[bloodraven432]

Does he charge by the hour or the douche-ness of the target?

[dtbjjrb]

Dammit, there SHOULD be a douchebag assassin!!!!!!! Fuckin' douchebags...

[Mikej1592]

ROFLMAO

[aidanivesdavis]

He looks like my principal. I've gained newfound respect for the administration.

[MrZAP17]

...So the girl stared in shock for a second and then just left without caring? I mean, sure he was a douchebag but...yeah, wow.

Still funny though.

[Longwittyusername]

Either that was the worst spray on tan ever or that douche soaked his face in blood.

[warpigs777]

wtf you lookin at



[Kansutachi]

wow that guy is REALLY good at being a douchebag haha i wanted to punch him myself

[metavash]

this guy needs to come to my school... NOW!!

[ArizonaCowboy116]

The names assassin, douche bag assassin.

[jrjr8619]

kill the jersey shore!!

[FromThe3PointLine]

The black guy needed an inner black man

[cupcakebabymwah]

elijah wood?

[AquaPearlPrincess107]

i hate the smell of Axe.

[cottoncandyplease]

If only it were real...



[FreshPofBellaireTX]

you gonna be real proud of me one day mama... one day.

imma become d-bag assassin

[mjsimons9757]

Why does every white ass douche bag wanna be a jit

[theberms03]

possible career choice? i think so

[jdoogy909]

if only he was real... *sigh*

[LegoPatapon]

@MelodiousStory Let me geuss... New Jersey.

[TheChayLopez]

@LegoPatapon LOL I knew someone would say that. See, I'm from Jersey, and people don't act like that here. I blame the Jersey Shore. That show has CREATED that stereotype for Jersey.

[whatev326]

LOVE THIS! Any chance we could see the Douchebag Assassin strike again??

[LetTheMelodyFlow]

FAKE! The bullet would have gone through his head before you could hear the sound because bullets travel faster than sound

[XDCaptainAwesomeXD]

@LetTheMelodyFlow no shit its fake

[0Koruzang0]

@LetTheMelodyFlow Man nothing gets by you.

[misty6315]

just realized his face is orange.

rad.

[LadyeXo]

@TheSecondCityNetwork So...Who is the Douche Bag Assassin, because I might need his number...

[therealonethistime]

I want one. =[

[mano4488]

why wasn't this a member from Jersey Shore?!?!?!?!

[RonH74]

That is hilarious

[lifeiswonderful22]

I'm the next douchebag assassin!

[paranoidparanoia]

If only the Douchebag Assassin was real...

[DXyNKaMiKazPS3]

Nannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn­nnnnnnnnnnn ! MDR

[StupidWiz]

He's so much cuter dead, thank you, douchebag assasin, LOL

and I love that the girl didn't even bother calling the police. <3

[KatKola]

YES.

[Lovepolkadots43]

Oh, I didn't know you knew my ex-boyfriend!

[bubblegumpop4569]

well, it seems as though my ex is now in a youtube video

[bigj687]

I fear the douchebag assassin would do no good in my area. You can't legally have more than 10 round magazine, and 10 douchebags is such a small percentage of the total I fear it would hardly make a difference. And they're reproducing too, these are dark times.

[incubustellar17]

The fake tanner on the face is CLASSIC :) haha

[sypiscool]

allllll haaiiiiiilllllllll douche bag assassin

[winterrose2008]

She should have walked away from the beginning.

[LexiPexi15]

"...so nobody." HA!

[typicalwhiteperson7]

The ending was the only good part.

[33dgtp]

Actually , wouldn't the bullet hit, FOLLOWED by the sound ?

[Clouds1Apprentice]

Ahahahahaha! That was great...

[MissStoryTelling]

dude if I were her, I would have left a long time ago

[OhZoneFan]

@MissStoryTelling I think she stayed because it's like looking at a train wreck. Oh, well.

[calvininsf]

@iSamSamSmiles the day this guy comes to my school is the day that I enter heaven.

[shelliefosho]

if only...

[iSamSamSmiles]

Hey I go to school with tons of those guys!

[jon93ek]

I love the obvious bronzer line.

[aika092]

Man it took him ages to line up that shot

[GreenEyedSummerGirl]

DOUCHEBAG ASSASSIN! Y U NO EXIST??

[BevinKB]

If this happened to me, I'd be happy to give the Douchebag Assassin a BJ!

[bryarworship]

FINALLY!! I can now feel safe outside

[ImmortalDestructor]

Why did she wait around when he was on the phone?

[sbruno10]

i'm pretty sure EVERYONE knows someone who is equally as douchey as this guy...

[James1803]

Thought it was about to be an allstate mayhem commercial with the way the assassin looked.

[AHMADAMOBMOHAMMED]

I like how he says digits <3

[dcolbert01]

Why must people read so much (racism, false douchebag tan, why jogger stopped, etc.) into what is simply a funny video. This isn't real people. I'm the black guy in this video and in reality I wouldn't have even stopped, but for the purposes of this hilarious video, that character I played did stop. BFD! Either it's funny to you or not. Move on.

[IloveuLL]

@dcolbert01 Because people are so used to the "token black guy" in films and TV that it's become what morons think is the norm. It's a damn stupid shame

[jel535s]

Nice twist. I am a fan.

[krankifish1]

What the hell is on his face? A foundation line??

[S1888ify]

Most Baller!

[HappyBunny0023]

LOL i wish it were that black guy shooting him.

[wasabirock]

douchebag him and tag him

[MichaelaLeach]

I wish this guy would follow me around during my workouts.... I'm sick of people yelling and gawking at me from their cars. If I wasn't breathing so hard from running my ass off they would be in tears by the time I was done with them. But they probably aren't worth wasting my breath on anyways.

[marianb311]

I love how the google pop up ad is for a douching product...thank you Summers Eve for your support

[sduff001]

Lol wasn't expecting that, good short!

[Fa9ooly323]

i like

[MishaShiaLove]

Douchebag assassin is my hero.

[ImprovAsylum]

"Yo wuddup broffael? It's mah boi"

hahhaha

[greenafy]

What's the music playing at the end of every single one of these videos?

[HollyTheFireNinja]

AHAHA I like it cause she just went back to jogging.

[MagicNeinStudios]

Can this be a new series?

[BevinKB]

Not only do we need douchebag assassins, we need anti-douchebag training!

[FREAKout59]

and not a single fuck was given that day

[Sei1863]

I felt violated 10 seconds in.

[Frizinho]

he's cute, though

[BlackCatJaja]

I am so stealing that "Nobody" line. ^-^

[thejoymonster]

Weird, I live in Hamburg and he looks like 90% of the German guys here. Sad, but true.

[THISISAVERYCOOLNAME]

if hes such a douche then why didnt the girl jus walk away?

[MOSTATROLEUM]

@THISISAVERYCOOLNAME Because everytime she tried he blocked her.

[BriBri771]

um. i don't like this. i love it. i wish i had my very own douchbag assasin. <3

[stagespectre]

...this situation could have been avoided if...he had a sassy gay friend.

[jointhefkndots]

I know someone who is EXACTLY like this except he's fat. I think we all do actually, lol

[TheBarbaraManatee]

i would have just...walked away from him. lol

[Kitara86]

YYEESSSS! Thank goodness he was so annoying! :D

[nicklongworth212]

brassassin?

[sarahelisawright]

hahahaha I would have not listened to his bs for that long!

[MysteriousC]

XDD That was awesome!!!

[frozenzoe]

This was hillarious. Good work! :)

[jposh707]

Wow, if only!!!

[drewthedirector]

WHO DID HIS MAKEUP?! SOMEONE NEEDS TO BE FIRED!

[bored8215]

@drewthedirector  haha i think its supposed to be that way.. to me it seems like hes trying to look like hes from the jersey shore!

[drewthedirector]

@bored8215 Yes I know...... its hard to read sarcasm in the comments.....

[BlackChipmunkParade]

Why did that bullet sound like thirty seconds before he got hit? ESPECIALLY at such a close range?

[QuatroDiablo]

I know that guy! I know, like, ten of that guy!

[PARHARIDOU]

@QuatroDiablo tru tru ;)

[chau2k5]

@QuatroDiablo then you should hire an assassin, duh!

[BarbiexCutie]

LMAO THE AXE

[supyal19]

yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy­yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

[softball35089]

why didn't she just walk away from him? lol. cool vid though. I liked the part where he got shot XD

[USADominiRican]

@softball35089 she wanted him.

[HomeIsABoxcar]

can i go?

lmaoooooo!

[mimix0x]

I wouldn't have even stayed and listened to him for as long as she did

[Rozencraft]

I support the organization where can i send my donation?

[ReThinkingTheism]

If the round is super-sonic, the bang comes after the explosion... or whatever.

[Candyheart174]

one less d-bag to take care of.

[xyzoneon]

use a silencer ffs

[LadyWeasel]

@xyzoneon On the rifle or the douche bag? I vote both.

[xyzoneon]

@LadyWeasel on the gun. don't want him getting caught.

[shamroxsalldaway]

freddiew coulda done better :)

[swimgurl514]

One of the best videos you've put up for a while--good job!

[JamesBlond000]

Can you please come to my school? More specifically, my film class?

[LegoPatapon]

THAT was absolutely hilarious :D

[artemis7an]

I can see the foundation lines on his face.

[saithwary]

LOL like a black guy would ever respond that way to someone says "fck you lookin at"

[TwoOldOaks]

@saithwary RACISM, IT WORKS

[crimsure]

@saithwary lol yeah its more like "What the fuck up with you, ill bust ya white sorry ass" and as he walks away its like "Dam white boy talking all shit to me coz he has underwere half way up his back, wigger gonna get shot" LOL

[ToddusRis]

@saithwary did you mean to say a stereotype of a black guy?

[saithwary]

@ToddusRis *most

[bellabob14]

<3

[madcol]

I was expecting this to be another run of the mill douchebag sketch. Nice twist, I kind of want to see a series for this.

[Nandomo321]

If there were a faction of douchebag-assassinating mercenaries, they would probably be more loved and successful than the German ones who helped the Americans win the War of Independence...

[ricosuave3355]

@Nandomo321 What are you talking about? the hessians were used by the british during the American Revolution idiot

[Nandomo321]

@ricosuave3355 Lol whoops that's right, misthought. Good thing you showed me by being a complete cock.

[BaneOfLannister]

Holy crap...It's like everybody I work with.

[SupaKirbTV]

Hey you! look at me.... what the fuck you looking at!

[vancel111]

bring it! XD

[TonicMike]

I love how she's all "oh, alright" and moves on.

[leereturn2006]

ok so the game Assassin Creed Anti-douchebag Hood will be out this year.

[Zero2Legend]

justice has been served 

[enelson554]

I think my boyfriend just found his future career. :D

[MaryJesusJoseph]

Very funny. Though I bet a lot of people posting on Youtube are just like the douchebag in this video.

[CntrBrdr]

I liked this one a lot. Spraying axe on the dick...reminds me of my roommate.

[frogfcker]

YES PLEASE!!!

[onamaykenobi]

That was actually surprisingly amusing.

[theone90d]

somehow it reminds me of Mike ''the situation'' from Jersey Shore.

TOTAL DOUCHEBAG SHIT

[JamesEzSecretChannel]

lol, love the twist ending :)

liked

[TitaniumSeraph]

lmao I wish they existed!

[movieboy01]

How can I sign up to be a douchebag assassin?

[JohnnySomething78]

epic win!

[MysticalFlyingMonkey]

This guy should do chavs, too...

[jdbadboy]

Does Pauly Shore have a son?

[HappyCupcakeGirl]

The Douchebag Assassin is my new hero.

[TheBojanovski]

i like this guy

[NeoArchitect4]

Douchey

[bloo1020]

..if only this was a real thing...if only

[LostintheWandering]

Like!

[CatInTheHat]

better then the mr douchebag song thing

[emak05]

@CatInTheHat hey dont you be hatin on ray william johnson! i like that song!

[StrayJ89]

If only... if only.

[WakeEntry]

He clearly hasn't made his way to NJ considering the abundance of Ed Hardy shirts I see every day.

[charmingwizkidwizard]

I actually know some guy that's a lot like this. 

[vietryc]

@charmingwizkidwizard

Don't we all! lol

[awefilledcreep]

he could save us all a lot of time and just take out nickleback 

I just thought, maybe the douchebag assassin will do a hit on all the people who keep making comments on Second City Network asking for more Sassy Gay Friend. It's kind of insulting to the people who took the time to make the other videos.