I know what you are going through and how you are feeling..it sounds like you are a bit of a perfectionist..which I am too. Maybe try taking up something like a musical instrument...for instance if you can try the guitar...doing something creative is really great because you don't have someone mouthing off to you or telling you what to do and u are in control! hugz to you!
i think, people have problems, but the can never be the real problem... so... take all the problems and find solutions which are the best for you... i know, it's not easy... but i think it's the best way... look to the future and not back to the past.. past is done.. you can't chance it.. but you can form your future.. and that is the most importaint thing..
i feel for you ash. i know the feeling of emotional pain, wondering if it will ever go away. I really hope you can get better one day. My name is ashleigh too by the way.
GO TO INPATIENT I am going 3 weeks from now for alcohol cocaine and valium addiction. It's not whatever, I don't want to quit, but I've had a little taste of how real life felt last time. IT IS WORTH IT. Don't listen to your brain, listen to your heart. I feel for you
Hi, My instant reaction to your vlog was to let you know to continue to share your feeling here, because I need to hear your story. Please strive to make a breakthrought and read the comments. Baby steps every day. Peace.
Hey! You are the reason why you shouldn't give up trying! I see so much potential, so much beauty! I just teared up...youtube is a healthy place to share your thoughts and emotions! Good for you sweetie!
Dont give up trying. I know the feeling of going through all different kinds of treatment and nothing seems to work, for years and years. Maybe you could find an inpatient treatment center in the states?
^please tell me how about is supposed to be said? (i do not pronounce it ABOOT, do i? i don't think so..and i know no other way of saying it..so..enlighten me and tell me?
I think it's pronounced like "uh - bawt". I know you don't know me, but I've been through depression myself and I know that it's hard to see the point of doing something that you know is just going to fail. YouTube is an amazing place to connect with other human beings! Even just by posting this blog you are helping other people by sharing a part of yourself. You have now become responsible to the people watching your blog who may be having a similar struggle. I hope it is a responsibility...
...that you will take seriously. Whatever other failures or successes you may have in this struggle, you can always encourage the people on YouTube who similarly struggle. It may seem like a small thing, but it matters more than you might think. Human beings were not meant to be alone. It is a sad thing that we have constructed our society so as to isolate us from each other so much. Thank you for your efforts in re-establishing that connection. I want you to know that it is appreciated!
Ashley, I know you have problems but you have so many good things from my view, you are smart, pretty, great hair :) and a clean safe place to live. These may sound like little things but they are important, btw I love the way you say about. Huggs baby!
As for the statement, "What If I fail?". You won't fail, I promise. I hope you find something that works for you because I know you can find something. The fact that you're posting on YouTube and letting a ton of people know about yourself, is such an amazing start!!!!
I have a simalir experience with trying to get into ED treatment. Only two places in the states would accept me and even then there is a lot of struggle to make things work. I dont have any answers, but I just wanted to reach out and tell you that I know how that feels...
Groups got to vote to accept you don't they? You are on youtube and you don't accept certain types as your friends. It is how it works, and you didn't accept me as a friend. I accept that. Better for both of us, even though I sent a GC to you. I accept that I'm not part of your group. sincerely J
It sounds like you feel that res TX would be best for you right now. What needs to happen before this can take place, less anxiety??? If this is so, then this is what your (and the psych) focus should be on for now. And if you think something wont work, you are probably right. Keep positive.
I hope that one of the treatment places works out for you. :-\ if not maybe if you got a second opinion from another phsyciatrist? cause sometimes ive noticed that some of them dont try as hard as they should. dont know about yours but im on my 3rd one and he's finally listening to the things that I say.
These people piss me off for you so much! *big big hugs* They have no idea what each individual goes through daily and how, for some people, just GETTING UP IN THE MORNING is an accomplishment. GOD! I could kick something right now. This makes me so angry Ashley! It's so fucked up. :'o( Umm, try asking her if there are any programs in Canada or the northwestern U.S. that take patients on scholarship. :o\
You don't look like shit Ash, you're beautiful. I'm sorry the other groups didn't work for you and I hope you get accepted, if it'll help it's worth it.. <33..
I guess the saying is once you hit the bottom the only way is up, sure you might feel worse after going to this therapy or whatever, but something has to work and something has to pick you back up in the end. You're an amazing girl, you're so strong and you've been through so much. I admire you and I know you can keep on going and one day you'll find something that does work, and something that makes you want to keep on trying..
Go vegan! You'll feel alot better =]
LilyandLola1 4 years ago
You remind me of Karen Carpenter, she was such a wasted life, dont let that happen sweetie.
gandt 4 years ago 2
thanks for sharing!
Davidscave 5 years ago
What Trama did you experience?
10109878 5 years ago
I know what you are going through and how you are feeling..it sounds like you are a bit of a perfectionist..which I am too. Maybe try taking up something like a musical instrument...for instance if you can try the guitar...doing something creative is really great because you don't have someone mouthing off to you or telling you what to do and u are in control! hugz to you!
indigolight84 5 years ago 2
i volunteered at the human society for a time period. that really made me feel better about my life.
kittyonthecouch 5 years ago
check your meds. many of them have black box warnings of suicidality...your meds could be exacerbating things
kittyonthecouch 5 years ago
Man, I hope she's okay. I miss her poems. I guess I miss her.
Just don't you go ANYWHERE - keep going. You're strong, it's just that it's still hard, very hard.
I'm sorry for my waffle. Just be gentle with yourself, Ash. Okay?
God Bless.
Siobhán.
nahbios 5 years ago
i understand exactly what ur going through...i currently am struggling
bonnymyhamster 5 years ago
i think, people have problems, but the can never be the real problem... so... take all the problems and find solutions which are the best for you... i know, it's not easy... but i think it's the best way... look to the future and not back to the past.. past is done.. you can't chance it.. but you can form your future.. and that is the most importaint thing..
just keep on going beauty.. keep on going..
Jomjael 5 years ago
i feel for you ash. i know the feeling of emotional pain, wondering if it will ever go away. I really hope you can get better one day. My name is ashleigh too by the way.
Ashleigh75 5 years ago
GO TO INPATIENT I am going 3 weeks from now for alcohol cocaine and valium addiction. It's not whatever, I don't want to quit, but I've had a little taste of how real life felt last time. IT IS WORTH IT. Don't listen to your brain, listen to your heart. I feel for you
6shotns240s 5 years ago
Hi, My instant reaction to your vlog was to let you know to continue to share your feeling here, because I need to hear your story. Please strive to make a breakthrought and read the comments. Baby steps every day. Peace.
JamJells 5 years ago
Eating is a good thing sweetheart. Get the mental help and start living a happy life. Don't be a victim of society.
tvjunkie1000 5 years ago
i wish you felt better. ;; i'll see what i can do.
peecacamix 5 years ago
Hey! You are the reason why you shouldn't give up trying! I see so much potential, so much beauty! I just teared up...youtube is a healthy place to share your thoughts and emotions! Good for you sweetie!
MandaGal06 5 years ago
In the end only you know what will work for you. So what do you know, that works for you?
Acinica 5 years ago
Dont give up trying. I know the feeling of going through all different kinds of treatment and nothing seems to work, for years and years. Maybe you could find an inpatient treatment center in the states?
Moonlightpoet 5 years ago
hehe I often think that too when you say OUT or ABOUT it is cute to me as it sounds like OOT... I am an aussie so we say it like OWWT.
bmuseful 5 years ago
(((HUGS)))
Silenceshattered09 5 years ago
^please tell me how about is supposed to be said? (i do not pronounce it ABOOT, do i? i don't think so..and i know no other way of saying it..so..enlighten me and tell me?
justagurl23 5 years ago
I think it's pronounced like "uh - bawt". I know you don't know me, but I've been through depression myself and I know that it's hard to see the point of doing something that you know is just going to fail. YouTube is an amazing place to connect with other human beings! Even just by posting this blog you are helping other people by sharing a part of yourself. You have now become responsible to the people watching your blog who may be having a similar struggle. I hope it is a responsibility...
TheMathGuy 5 years ago
...that you will take seriously. Whatever other failures or successes you may have in this struggle, you can always encourage the people on YouTube who similarly struggle. It may seem like a small thing, but it matters more than you might think. Human beings were not meant to be alone. It is a sad thing that we have constructed our society so as to isolate us from each other so much. Thank you for your efforts in re-establishing that connection. I want you to know that it is appreciated!
TheMathGuy 5 years ago
Ashley, I know you have problems but you have so many good things from my view, you are smart, pretty, great hair :) and a clean safe place to live. These may sound like little things but they are important, btw I love the way you say about. Huggs baby!
imindelaware 5 years ago
ok ok, seriously...see the commment above the one thats above this one? Thats one I posted when I didn't watch any of your videos.
I'm sorry, me=a little slooww, lol.
WhlzOnFre 5 years ago
As for the statement, "What If I fail?". You won't fail, I promise. I hope you find something that works for you because I know you can find something. The fact that you're posting on YouTube and letting a ton of people know about yourself, is such an amazing start!!!!
WhlzOnFre 5 years ago
As for the statement "What if I fail?" Well, you never know unless you try. You can't fail if you tried.
Well, I hope things work out with you and you do find an answer (that you like).
WhlzOnFre 5 years ago
You know, I only do some things once a week. I agree with you that it's not a lot of time, and it's difficult to go far in that amount of time.
But what if you looked at it another way?
Does it help to think that going once a week is better then not doing anything at all? Just a thought.
WhlzOnFre 5 years ago
You do not look like shit...you never do...From what I hear, I don`t like your psychiatrist very much...
CellThePeacefull 5 years ago
I have a simalir experience with trying to get into ED treatment. Only two places in the states would accept me and even then there is a lot of struggle to make things work. I dont have any answers, but I just wanted to reach out and tell you that I know how that feels...
TwistedBarbie 5 years ago
I am so sorry you feel so bad Ashley I just hope you can get in to a progam thats for you try to be positive we are all here for you
johnb2003 5 years ago
Groups got to vote to accept you don't they? You are on youtube and you don't accept certain types as your friends. It is how it works, and you didn't accept me as a friend. I accept that. Better for both of us, even though I sent a GC to you. I accept that I'm not part of your group. sincerely J
Shiporu 5 years ago
Hugs, I am sorry that this is so hard for you and I pray that you can get this worked out.
blessed923 5 years ago
OK, one man's unsolicited opinion: You are totally hot! :)
adventureindustries 5 years ago
i wish we had groups like that in NY. hang in there ((hugs))
jesmalu 5 years ago
It sounds like you feel that res TX would be best for you right now. What needs to happen before this can take place, less anxiety??? If this is so, then this is what your (and the psych) focus should be on for now. And if you think something wont work, you are probably right. Keep positive.
DisguisedAsMyself 5 years ago
You need to keep trying. Don't give up.
drcoz 5 years ago
Yeahhh group therapy never worked for me =/ *hugs* We love you
Alekona87 5 years ago
I haven't been on in a while, so anyway I hope you can get some treatment, and that you get into a good place that has a program that works for you.
Spencer522652 5 years ago
I hope that one of the treatment places works out for you. :-\ if not maybe if you got a second opinion from another phsyciatrist? cause sometimes ive noticed that some of them dont try as hard as they should. dont know about yours but im on my 3rd one and he's finally listening to the things that I say.
alissashreddah 5 years ago
why wont my comment post?
DisguisedAsMyself 5 years ago
I have been having the same problem
johnb2003 5 years ago
These people piss me off for you so much! *big big hugs* They have no idea what each individual goes through daily and how, for some people, just GETTING UP IN THE MORNING is an accomplishment. GOD! I could kick something right now. This makes me so angry Ashley! It's so fucked up. :'o( Umm, try asking her if there are any programs in Canada or the northwestern U.S. that take patients on scholarship. :o\
leezie666 5 years ago
argh it cut off my first bit.
You don't look like shit Ash, you're beautiful. I'm sorry the other groups didn't work for you and I hope you get accepted, if it'll help it's worth it.. <33..
neonhandshakex 5 years ago
I guess the saying is once you hit the bottom the only way is up, sure you might feel worse after going to this therapy or whatever, but something has to work and something has to pick you back up in the end. You're an amazing girl, you're so strong and you've been through so much. I admire you and I know you can keep on going and one day you'll find something that does work, and something that makes you want to keep on trying..
neonhandshakex 5 years ago